so I was sitting with matt at lunch and he started talking about this girl he sort of messed around with last weekend.. he just got to "second base" but he said it bothered him though, because the whole time he was just thinking about his ex.. and said it felt like he was cheating.. she is out screwing other people and he can't even be with anyone ( Read more... )

my friends were already giving me shit about not doing something with that girl. I ended up turning down two girls this last weekend too. one was good looking but had a b/f, that just didn't sit right with me. I just wasn't attracted to the other. now they're really giving me shit. I woke up this morning after I had a pretty good sleep, a rarity. I ( Read more... )

so I'm really pissy today at de randomly and for almost no current reason. it rubs me the wrong way that some dude that she was talking to and started something with for less than a month means more to her than I do. I know, it's child like. it would make anyone feel that way though if they were in the same situation. I mean, if me and her stopped ( Read more... )

a major reason why I dislike this job, I work alone most of the day and I have way too much time to think about things. not to mention there's hardly any mental stimulation, just the same old bullshit everyday. I was patching up the concrete in some of the basements, thinking far too much. of course eventually I thought of De. the situation came to ( Read more... )

does anyone know how to make a journal "friends only" ?

..a rare post where I'm talking to someone other than myself

I was cleaning out a house at work, getting lost in my thoughts again, when I looked across the street and saw a little baby playing in the sprinklers with his mom. it made me think about things. I want kids so bad. I think I'd be a pretty good dad. it's weird, because right now I really just want to party and be stupid with random girls. at the ( Read more... )

I think I'm an idiot when it comes to chicks. joe says I definately am. he said that the ( girl )

my problem in a break up is that I don't push feelings aside or try to forget them. I just feel them. so if I love someone and I should be trying to not think about loving them, I don't. I guess it's because I don't want to cheapen what we had. I want it to stay special and be something I can take with me in my heart. that's hard to do when you're ( Read more... )

well, I was really bummed yesterday and we were having a party. a few girls showed up. one girl, ann, gave me the eyes when she first showed up. I started talking to her but I wasn't in the mood to be too flirty or even try to be funny at all. so we hung out most of the night, then chad asked me why I didn't look very happy.. I said I was thinking ( Read more... )

I was thinking about stuff today, while on the toilet. hey.. I couldn't find anything to read. I was thinking about how I have these set standards for things instead of just letting things flow. like how far I'd go for my loved ones and how I'm supposed to be towards them. it's like a control thing with myself maybe, or maybe I just wanted to try ( Read more... )