For an atheist, I say the word "God" a lot. "Thank God it's Friday" or "I swear to God" come out of my mouth fairly often. During my classic rock phase, I used to sometimes substitute "Clapton," but that time is over. We need something more modern and something that sounds like a better substitute for "God ( Read more... )

To: WonkyWheels, WW's Brother
Subject: Happy Yom Kippur

Yes, you're welcome for not making you be observant Jews.

Love,
Mom

So, apparently, we are going to see Doubt for Jewmas this year. As I told my family, "What better movie for Jews to see on Christmas than a movie about a nun and a potentially child-molesting priest?" I'm hungry for the Chinatown Chinese food already...

On my way out of the subway this morning (I was running late, as always), these two young women offered me a "free granola bar." Of course, I happily accepted it; I hardly ever turn down anything that's free. But then I noticed that it came with a card that said, "This is our simple way of saying that God loves you." Ladies, if you're going to try ( Read more... )

My life is more like college now than it has been for the past couple of years. I think it's no coincidence that since I've lived with 22-year-olds, I've had someone pee on my floor. And then last night for Molly H's 23rd birthday, we drank scorpion bowls complete with Baccardi 151. Oh, sophomore year. When I drank a sip, I exclaimed, "Holy crap!" ( Read more... )

Becky: I heard we might close at 3:00 today!
VP of Finance: Um... no....
Becky: But it's Good Friday, and we have to leave early to practice our religion.
VPoF: Are you Catholic?
Becky: No, the Red Sox game is on!

Hey, it was worth a shot....

I just tried again by pleading, "Let my people go!" Moses style. That didn't work either.

I went to a Chanukkah party last night with my friend Lany. Cooking latkes creates a powerful aroma! I seriously need to get my coat dry cleaned now. It reeks. And I couldn't sleep because my hair smelled like fried potatoes. But the party was really fun, and I was shocked to learn (bad Jew that I am) that the candle-lighting prayers have tunes! My ( Read more... )