Almost completely out of the blue yesterday, I was told by a man whom I don't even want to date or sleep with (although he sure as hell wants to get in my pants; sigh) that I'm not "relationship material ( Read more... )

My car, after four and a half thankless & loyal years, has basically given up. Judging by its current behavior, it more than likely needs a new transmission, and it's just not worth the money at this point. I thought for sure my bank would approve me for an auto loan, but they denied me due to "insufficient credit history" (um wut; I've had credit ( Read more... )

So, as I'm sure many of you have heard, Wisconsin currently boasts a complete and utter pig as their DA. His "sexting" is finally coming to light after harassing these women, as well it should ( Read more... )

RANDOM QUESTION TIME ( Read more... )

So as some of you may already know, my tubal was a success. No issues with anesthesia aside from very mild nausea/vomiting that went away promptly, thankfully. Pain has been off and on, mostly discomfort from being so bloated up with the CO2 gas they use to inflate your abdomen D: Hopefully this ends soon, because every single stretch mark I've ( Read more... )

Definitely just broke ANOTHER fucking Hitachi Magic Wand, and this one wasn't even a year old! I mean, at least it didn't explode in a fireball this time, but godDAMN it anyway. Aren't there drugs to calm a sex drive like this??

Things that are awesome - hauling ass halfway across the city at 10.30pm at breakneck speed to pick up friends and get to the sex shop before closing time, eventually leaving there with (among all three) a glass anal plug, a bullet that vibrates in time with your MP3 player, a Hitachi wand knockoff, and a "Couples" grab bag that later reveals to ( Read more... )

Oh, inappropriate 80s masturbation songs, how I love you.

Yes, I'm looking at you, "I Touch Myself", "She-Bop" and "Dancing With Myself".

Also, best quote ever - "The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time." - Bertrand RussellI do believe he's sanctioning my desire to lie in bed and play Pokémon Platinum as opposed to cleaning or doing ( Read more... )

I just blew up a vibrator.

Yes, you're reading that right. Blew. Up. A. Vibrator.

Evidently my laziness in acquiring electrical tape was not a good idea.

Nothing like a giant orange fireball-esque explosion in the morning when all you want to do is get off. Sigh. I'm just glad the carpet didn't catch on fire.

Whenever I feel particularly down about being single and COMPLETELY fucking unable to find someone moderately intelligent, interesting, motivated, emotionally available and attractive who ISN'T either a complete horndog or absolutely insane (or both ( Read more... )