just what you were hoping for, another post from me.

another post about how wonderful and beautiful my girlfriend is, even though we hardly get to see each other lately.  for some reason ive been watching all these canonical lesbian movies lately (the word always reminds me of nicole spending a whole night saying lehzbeein in this drawl, just ( Read more... )

dont actually have anything interesting to say, but im procrastinating taking my transcripts to U of T so i can take classes this summer.  I'm annoyed because I think I might have missed the cutoff while waiting for my French transcripts.  mixed feelings about the whole thing really.  i want to take the classes, I just wish it didnt have to be ( Read more... )

reminder to myself.

also try these things:
eat
sleep
breathe
take time to be alone

there is no spoon.

it frightens me how affected i can be by the weather. if there is sun, i can handle hardship and things not going according to plan, like yesterday, for example.

and then there are days like today, when no matter what i do, it just feels wrong. unfulfilling. whether i try to run errands in the nasty drizzle, go drink coffee, go home and eat, read, ( Read more... )

no matter how much i do, all i can think is that im not working hard enough, not doing enough. all i see is the things yet to be done, goals not yet acheived. the molasses-like pace of things. if i havent done 10 things today, i feel i have done nothing at all ( Read more... )

i would like to leave the worst of the last year on the threshhold of the new, and step into the life i have wanted. but i dont have high hopes. all the stupid little things between me and such things. why put so much pressure on what is really a day like any other? i will only be disappointed ( Read more... )

working working working ( Read more... )

i never actually realized that wm s burroughs was from st louis.  and died in lawrence, KS shortly before i moved there.  less than a month, in fact ( Read more... )

i would like more money. but i am loathe to sacrifice the things i am doing now in order to get some bilingual admin - or worse, customer service - job. maybe i should. maybe after a couple years of that, i could get sthg bilingual in my fucking feild. or not. i could just shrivel up and have money but no time or energy for art... i know id be ( Read more... )

Mixed emotions, really, Cynthia. Like the time I drank the orange juice with ice in it...a good day, though turns out workshop at art city is postponed a week. i am looking forward to the stuff i have planned, but also would like a little money. also got an official rejection letter this evening. already had surmised i didnt get it, but still ( Read more... )