Fucking Russia. Bloody Russians. Ruined my night, they did. (I spent the last forty minutes staring at my hands, listless and helpless, not believing what I saw the few times I could get myself to look up. And when Ruud van N. scored, four minutes before the end of the game, I couldn't believe it, it was so good - and we lost in the thirty extra ( Read more... )

I woke up and he was screaming...

I wanted to say, well, she’s my new musical obsession, but that’s not true, the other songs don’t have this feeling to them.

I’m annoyed at SvV and Tad and stuff, because apparently they’ve (with Matt and Jim) decided that SvV’s coming with us to Lowlands and I had no idea, no one else from the group had any idea. ( Read more... )

I live in a town called Millhaven

and it’s small and it’s mean and it’s cold
but if you come around just as the sun goes down
you can watch the whole thing turn to gold

Disorienting day. Fell asleep on the couch at eleven, woke up briefly to say that I was up, got up at two, spent three hours on an entry, slept, awoke, went to the hospital, waited in ( Read more... )

you could’ve been a doctor in a soft easy chair

Jas says listening to Bauhaus twenty hours a day is unhealthy, I think sleeping four hours a night every night most of the week has been unhealthier, but still I deeply regret staying home Thursday morning. No, actually, I regret falling asleep at midnight and again at five in the morning when I should ( Read more... )

On some hustle-bustle evening before Rome me and SvV were talking about working for newspapers, columnist jobs and how basically impossible it is to get them. Let’s walk in at the local newspaper together one day, he suggested. We both take our tremendously impressive portfolios and blow them away. I told him I didn’t exactly have a portfolio in ( Read more... )

i. It’s like the early days of the breakdown, when the thought of speaking to you filled me with such distaste that the thought itself became a sort of act of self-harm.

ii. I saw Der Himmel Über Berlin (the film) in the music store yesterday, and I bought it today. Apparently the play was a success in other cities too (was it a success in the US, ( Read more... )