Honeyfund questions?

[misskelleen]

Hi all!

My wedding is on August 4th of this year!  :)
My fiancé and I have decided to ask those guests who wish to give us a gift to instead help out with our Honeymoon fund, and we are not doing the usual registry/gift tradition.  I looked through the tags and found several opinions about whether or not it's okay to ask for this, whether people

Comments

[ipsafictura]

Opinions will differ on this, but mine (and this is also the opinion of most etiquette guides) is that it's in bad taste to mention gifts in any way on your invitation, as it's seen as a solicitation for gifts. Registries should be an "ask" item, and you shouldn't tell people unprompted what you want to receive.

[misskelleen]

I don't plan to put it on the invitation. If I do print up something it would probably be on a small card that accompanies the invite, added inside the envelope.

[herladyship]

No, she means it shouldn't be sent out with the invitation at all.

We only told people who asked where we were registered. I generally think it's tacky to do anything else. BUT if you have a wedding website, it seems to be ok to mention it on there.

[ipsafictura]

That's more or less the same thing, etiquettewise.

[texasoddity]

My (F)SIL went the honeyfund route and we just threw her a bridal shower. Her MOH simply listed honeyfund as the place FSIL was registered on the shower invitation. A few people still gave her gifts, which we expected, but most people gave her a card with a check and/or printout from honeyfund

[texasoddity]

Sorry meant to start by saying that my post is in regards to the bridal shower, not the wedding. FSIL will not list anything registry related on/in the invitation. She will rely on word-of-mouth.

[misskelleen]

Good to know, thank you!

[misskelleen]

OMG, I absolutely LOVE this idea of the map!!!!! I think I will do something similar, that is such a cute way to involve everyone in the fun of the honeymoon!!!!!!

Thank you so much for your input!

Also, your last two sentences. Just, too perfect. :P

[plain_mornings]

I would never mention gifts on the invitation, I find that very tacky. If you send out save the dates, include your wedding website on them somewhere (but I wouldn't mention gifts on the STD). Put the information on the website for people who are wondering.

[misskelleen]

Yes, I wasn't planning doing it ON the invitation, but I thought maybe some people had perhaps done it that way...

Thanks for your input! I'm thinking that the link on the Wedding Website will be the perfect place.

:)

[greatmachinery]

mentioning gifts on the invitation is gauche as hell -- don't do it. give a url for your wedding website. otherwise, i plan to do a similar thing except to pay for our house.

[misskelleen]

Yes, I'm not planning to do it on the invitation, I know not to mention the gifts on there at all. I was thinking more of including a little card about registry/gifts. But perhaps the website would be a better place for this, and I won't include anything in the invite envelope after all...

I've heard of people doing this type of thing for their house! I hope it works out for you!

:)

[greatmachinery]

yeah, i think it's not kosher to mention gifts anywhere in the invitation "package." i do like your wording and think it would be perfect on a website. it's best to include a small traditional registry as well.

[misskelleen]

I wonder if that's kind of changing though? The last few weddings I attended or was invited to, they all included a small card in their envelope with registry info on it. But maybe I'll just avoid the whole thing and do website only...

[fuckedbeauty]

I sent a separate small card with our website address on it. Most people know where we are registered, as we have sent them there to buy birthday & christmas gifts for us. However, we are starting to rethink everything and possibly start a honeyfund. I vastly decreased the # of items on our registry to upgrade the cheap crap we already have.

My FSIL told us that it would be horrible not to register for china. Hi... I break EVERYTHING I touch, and it isn't 1955... so I don't think it is "horrible" to not register for crap I won't use, or will break if I ever do use it. Everyone has opinions. LOL.

[misskelleen]

I am feeling the same way about china!!! But if people in my family feel REALLY strongly about it, I will pick some out I guess? I know we will never use it though, eeep!

[fuckedbeauty]

I straight up refuse. I don't want people buying me that instead of a super awesome new vacuum that I want. LOL.

[lizzie]

If you're never going to use it, then don't register for it! It's a waste of your family and friend's money to buy you china if it's just going to sit in boxes in the attic or something. Why not pick out a set of every-day plates and bowls, instead?