Good Morning, Mr. Hyde, Today I'm Gonna Rock Your World - Chapter 6B
Title: Good Morning, Mr. Hyde, Today I’m Gonna Rock Your World - Chapter 6B
Author: Mayonaka no Taiyou/ unare_haineko
Pairing: hyde x tetsu
Rating: R-ish overall, but again, this chapter’s definitely NC-17…
Summary: Hyde is having marital problems and Tetsu decides to exploit the opportunity to address his longtime obsession with Hyde.
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WARNING! The author has rated this chapter NC-17 for sexually explicit content. If you are offended by this kind of content, proceed no further. If you have reached this page in error, please click on the ‘Back’ button of your browser at this time.
Hyde returned to Tetsu’s house in the afternoon of the next day.
“I’m back,” Hyde called, removing his shoes at the entrance. “Tetsu?”
Hyde walked past the living room and peered into the kitchen.
“Tetsu?”
There was no answer. Hyde walked to the bedroom and set down his things.
“Tetsu?”
The house was quiet except for the droning of a lone fan that had been left on in the living room.
“TETSU?” Hyde called a little louder.
“Downstairs!” called a muffled voice.
“Where are you?”
“Over here!”
‘Over here’…what does he take me for? Psychic?
Hyde rolled his eyes.
“And this is why you manage the band and I write the lyrics,” mumbled Hyde as he started down the stairs.
“Have you slept?” Hyde called, picking up random objects as he made his way to the lower level-jacket on the railing, socks at the bottom of the stairs, a bottle of water on the chair, and a packet of tissues next to a bag of marbles in the middle of the wood floor.
“No,” Tetsu called. “Did you go out or something?”
“Yeah, I went back home.”
“Really? How come you came back so soon?”
“I went home to go look at the hose that was supposedly leaking or flooding our garden…”
Hyde bent down to pick up the bag of marbles, which unfortunately had a hole in it, so when he picked it up, they all spilled out from the side, scattering all over the open floor.
“Damn it,” Hyde muttered, as he chased after the marbles.
“Did you fix it?”
“No, I called the gardener, who I found out was the incompetent one who broke it in the first place.”
“So what’d you do?”
“I called the landscaper for a referral. He told me he’d call someone to take a look at it, but he called back and told us that his guy couldn’t come out until morning. He came at five this morning to work on it. We had to take Rei to baseball practice at seven…and on the way back, we got into a fight…”
Hyde felt like a kid as he placed another marble in the hem on his shirt. He had about thirty of the fifty that had scattered.
“What about?”
“Everything and nothing. I’ll spare you the details. Long story short, she told me I was a crappy father. I told her to stop interfering with my work since I’m the only one working unless she wants to go back to work. I told her I was willing to pay for a nanny for Rei.”
As Hyde picked up the last red marble, he came upon a door that he had not noticed previously. What set this door apart from the others was that this door was painted the same off white as the walls. Tetsu’s other doors on the basement floor were a similar shade of light mahogany to match the wood floor. Hyde tried the knob and found it was locked.
“Tetsu?” Hyde said, overjoyed that he had found a plastic bag on the table and was now dumping the marbles into the zip pouch receptacle.
“Hmm?” Tetsu called absently.
“What’s in here?” Hyde asked, pointing to the door in question.
“Huh?” Tetsu poked his head out of the music room. “Oh. A dead body.”
“What?!”
“Don’t worry about it,” Tetsu said in a serious voice. “He won’t bother you. But just for a good measure, I’ve locked the door…And why are you…wet…?”
“Megu got angry at the end and threw a bucket of water at me.”
“Is that supposed to deter negative behavior or something? What does she take you for-a cat?”
“But more importantly…Come on, seriously, Tetsu, what’s really in there?”
“I told you, a dead body.”
“Right just like how you told everyone my real name is Doi Hachiro-which I might add, is the worst fake name you could have given me! Come on, what’s really in there?”
Hyde was getting impatient and his curiosity was becoming more and more apparent.
“Nothing,” Tetsu replied, putting away his bass and closing the door to the music room. “Don’t worry about it. It’s nothing of interest to you.”
Tetsu shrugged and started to walk up the stairs.
“Oooh, but if it’s nothing, then why is it locked??!” Hyde asked bouncing after him like a kitten on a sugar rush.
“I dunno, too lazy to unlock it. Why do you wanna know so bad anyway?” Tetsu asked, as they reached to top of the stairs onto his main floor. “Do you have a thing for locked doors or something?”
“No,” Hyde said quickly, plopping himself onto the couch and suddenly finding the cushions very interesting.
“You do, don’t you?” Tetsu grinned impishly.
“No, I don’t!”
“Yes, you do! You have a thing for locked doors! Secrets bother you and you wanna know what’s behind that door, don’t you?”
“No, I don’t!” Hyde cut in. “I’m not curious. See, here I am just watching TV. Look at me; I don’t care.”
Tetsu rolled his eyes and Hyde tried (mostly in vain) to try and gain back the upper hand by feigning disinterest.
“Well, I guess you’ll never know what’s behind that door since there’s no key for it,” Tetsu teased in a singsong voice.
“There’s no key?!”
“Aha! So you do want to know!” Tetsu said, jumping onto the cushion next to Hyde, causing his pouting princess to bounce with the intrusion.
“No, I don’t!” Hyde protested, turning away as Tetsu played with a loose tendril of Hyde’s long, sleek hair. “But how are you supposed to open the door with no key?! I saw the keyhole!”
“Well, I guess since it doesn’t bother you, it doesn’t matter right?” Tetsu said, kissing Hyde on the cheek.
“Tetsuuu!!” Hyde whined.
“There’s nothing in there, I told you! Only a dead body! Don’t think about it. Really, there’s nothing of interest to see in there.”
Tetsu looked at Hyde’s pleading face.
“Oh, all right. If you can figure out how to open it without BREAKING IT DOWN, you can see what’s inside.”
“Yaay, huh?-open it without breaking it down?”
“Yeah. Figure out how to open it and you can see that there’s nothing behind that door. I’ll give you a hint, so you don’t ransack my house looking for a key. That door is the only door that can open without a key.”
0-0-0-0-0
Over the next few days, Hyde became obsessed with the locked door. Tetsu found the situation to be rather amusing, so he pushed the armchair from the music room out to sit in while Hyde tried to figure out how to open the door. While Hyde tried everything from pounding on the door to picking the lock, Tetsu managed to read nearly three novels. Today was another attempt at picking the lock.
“You’re really not good at lock-picking, are you?” Tetsu commented from behind his magazine.
“Shut up,” Hyde said as he inserted a weird looking screwdriver tip into the keyhole.
“Have you ever picked a lock successfully, Hyde?”
“No, why? Is it that obvious?”
“Yes,” Tetsu said, placing the subscription card that fell on his lap on the floor.
“Have you?” asked Hyde, jiggling the screwdriver in hopes that something would unlock.
“Picked my first one when I was eight years old,” Tetsu replied, taking a sip of iced tea as he turned the page.
“Are you serious?” Hyde said, pulling the screwdriver out and tossing it into the cardboard box he had of ‘useless tools’ hanging out in front of the door.
“Yeah. I lost the key to my showcase and I wanted to put my newly finished model into it, so I picked the lock.”
“Shut up, no way.”
“Wait here,” Tetsu set his magazine on the chair and disappeared in the music room. He returned with a small toolbox.
“Here’s a standard padlock and a combination lock. Pull on them. They’re locked,” Tetsu said, handing them to Hyde. Hyde tested them and handed them back to Tetsu. “I’ll do the padlock first.”
Tetsu took out a paperclip and inserted it into the keyhole. After less than thirty seconds, the spring triggered and the padlock was released.
“Here…Okay, now I’ll do the combination.”
Tetsu placed his ear next to the combination lock and turned the knob several times. Just as quickly, before Hyde could respond, he had the combination one open.
“You knew the combination to that one,” Hyde said accusingly.
“But, I wasn’t looking at the numbers when I cracked the combination one. My memory’s not so good and these days, it’s hard to keep track and remember them all.”
“Remember them all?”
“See,” Tetsu turned the box around to reveal that the entire box was filled with padlocks and combination locks that were physically identical. “I just chose one randomly…”
“You’re too much…” Hyde murmured. “Bah, I think I should give up.”
“Already?” Tetsu teased. “You’re ready to give up already?”
“I think those nimble fingers of yours could be put to better use. Oh! Wait! I’ve got another idea!”
Hyde stood up and scrambled over to the door. He stood in front of the door and stared at it for several seconds.
When he opened it out, he belted, “Koware sou na, supiido agete-“
“Why are you singing ‘Heaven’s Drive’?” asked Tetsu.
“Barabara ni chirabaru hanabira…muchuu de, hayaku, kakenukete kita…toki wo kanadete omoi wa afureru…kawaita kaze wo karamase…meguri kuru toki ni…HIRAKE GOMA!!!-“
“As lovely of a medley that was of ‘Flower’, ‘Ready Steady Go’, ‘Niji’, ‘Honey’, and ‘Blurry Eyes’, the door’s not voice activated, so the last part about ‘open sesame’ will not work, Hyde.”
“Oh, okay, well then I give up,” he said. “Let’s go to bed…”
0-0-0-0-0
After a few more days of fruitless fiddling, Hyde appeared to have given up. The only breakthrough that Hyde had made was that the door was heavy and that probably no amount of force short of a typhoon could break it down. Discouraged, Hyde had no choice but to return to the normal schedule of work, eating, sleeping, and sex.
Then, one afternoon while Tetsu was taking a nap, Hyde came out of the music room after having written a song. Strolling down the hallway, something about the way the light had caught on the chandelier caused him to look at the secret door. Walking to the ‘secret room’, he squinted at the door. It was at this time when he noticed that one of the square panels looked odd. The door was painted like the walls, but it had eight square panels, four rows of two, equally spaced, cut about three or four centimeters deep into the door. What he had not noticed previously was how well those panels were cut into the door.
Hyde ran his fingers lightly over the panels located in the middle of the door. They were solid, but something did not feel right. Hyde reached up to the upper left one and brushed against it. The panel seemed to be loose when Hyde touched it. Hyde pushed it to the left. Nothing. He pushed it to the right. Nothing.
Hmm....
Hyde craned his neck to the right and noticed that embedded in the doorframe was a small button at the same level as the top left panel. When he pressed it, he heard something click and saw the panel vibrate slightly. Hyde pushed the left panel horizontally and was disappointed when it did not open. Then, he pushed it up just to see if anything would happen. He was surprised when the thin panel slid up easily five centimeters revealing a dial lock embedded within the door.
Of course, leave it to Tetsu to safeguard it with puzzles.
Hyde saw that the dials were of katakana set at ‘A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A’.
Eight dials…what would be eight characters? Ogawa Tetsuya? O-ga-wa-Te-tsu-ya…No that’s only six…wait a minute!
Hyde knew what word was eight characters.
RA-RU-KU-A-N-SHI-E-RU
When Hyde slide the final ‘ru’ into place, he heard a bolt released. He looked to the right panel. He slid it up and found another dial lock with katakana set at ‘A-A-A-A-A-A’.
This one must be Ogawa Tetsuya.
O-GA-WA-TE-TSU-YA.
The sound of a bolt dropping from the right led Hyde to believe that the next panel was the second on the right. He pushed the panel up. Nothing. When he pushed it to the right, it slid to reveal another dial lock with numbers set at ‘’0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0’.
This must be his birthday.
1-9-6-9-1-0-0-3.
The next panel was a dial lock of Roman alphabets set at ‘A-A-A-A’.
Hyde took a guess and set it to ‘B-A-S-S.’ Another panel opened. This one showed a dial lock with a mixture of Roman alphabets and numbers set at ‘A-A-A-A-A-0-0’.
T-E-T-S-U-6-9?
The next one had only four numbers to figure out. Hyde knew that the last three panels must be something tricky, but still he tried the obvious ones for the four digit dial lock.
1-1-1-1? Nope. 0-1-2-3. Nope. 1-2-3-4.
Hyde felt that to save time, since there were only four numbers, he would just go in numerical order. About twenty minutes later, the panel opened at 0-1-2-9.
What an odd number. That’s not his bank PIN…what’s so significant about 0-1-2-9? Well, whatever.
Hyde came to the final two panels. The one on the bottom right had a dial lock with Roman alphabets set at ‘A-A-A-A’.
Well, it's probably not 'B-A-S-S'...Four letter word...?
Hyde pushed the first one up and down as he struggled to think of the word Tetsu might have chosen. As he turned the dial, it suddenly stopped and something unlocked. Hyde looked at where it had stopped.
H? Does the word start with H?
Hyde turned the second dial to ‘Y’ and heard even more movement coming from within the door.
H-Y-D-E…
It sounded like cogs and wheels were turning from within the door. Hyde waited as the door appeared to be unlocking itself, its final act opened the last panel revealing nothing underneath the thin piece of wood. Hyde tried the doorknob. It was still locked much to his disappointment.
How does this door open?!
Hyde ran his fingers against it and knocked on it, but it was to no avail. Then he remembered how the first panel had opened. When he looked around the frame, he saw that there was another button next on the bottom of the door, just like the upper level panel. When he pressed it, the sound of a huge deadbolt unlocking reverberated through the door. Hyde turned the knob and the heavy door gave way.
Hyde walked in and found it was a room with no furniture-only boxes and piles of stuff. It looked like a storage room.
“But why would he lock it?” wondered Hyde, as he opened the closet. Peering inside the closet, he saw that it had been filled with all of Tetsu’s old Indies clothes on one side. On the other side, Hyde poked around the ground and found some old hats, makeup, accessories, and shoes. He noted that this was where Tetsu was storing all his platform shoes also. So far, it just appeared that Tetsu had been using it to store all the things he could not bear to part with from the good old days. When Hyde closed the closet door, he turned around and accidentally knocked one of the stacks of small boxes down, spilling the contents of the box on the top, which had not been closed.
Hyde first straightened the stack and then bent down to pick up what had been scattered all over the carpeted floor. It had been mostly papers and photos. Picking some up and examining them closely, he saw that the box he had dropped was filled with photos, newspaper and magazine clippings, and other memorabilia of him (Hyde) and Sakura. The picture that Hyde picked up first was attached to a magazine article and had him sitting on Sakura’s lap staring straight forward innocently as Sakura held him from behind. There were others. Sakura half naked and carrying him, Sakura pressing himself up against him, him centimeters from Sakura’s face, close enough to kiss him.
While they were only fan service photos from magazines and calendars, Hyde quickly shoved all the clippings and photos back into the folder as if he did not want to be reminded about this part of his past. Tetsu never asked him about Sakura, not when Sakura left, not a word about it until this very day. He did not even ask about Hyde’s previous lovers or even about Megumi. Hyde, on the other hand, despite having the full knowledge that Tetsu would hand him his heart on a silver platter had he asked, was quite the jealous lover. When he demanded to know about Tetsu’s past, Tetsu had told him everything he wanted to know. Since Tetsu did not bother covering anything up (including the fact that he sometimes could not remember the name of whatever it was he dragged home), Hyde really had no right to complain (though he had been initially shocked to say the least that he was not the first man that had ever been in Tetsu’s bed).
When he was shoving the Hyde-Sakura stuff back into the box, Hyde noticed that an envelope, about the size of a sheet of printing paper folded in half vertically, that had fallen out also. He picked it up. Finding it to be quite heavy, he turned it around to read what had been written on the front.
“OGAWA TETSUYA-SAMA” it read in large printed characters.
He turned the envelope over and found it had been opened. Hyde shrugged and lifted the flap. Inside was a piece of paper and another envelope. He shook the contents out and unfolded the letter.
“Ogawa Tetsuya-sama,” he read silently. “I have completed my investigation. And, as you have requested, I have placed the results of my intensive investigation in a plain envelope within this one along with a cover sheet and have marked it accordingly.”
Hyde looked at the smaller envelope, which he turned over and found to read, “THE ANSWER TO YOUR QUESTION.”
“I have substantial proof to support my analysis,” he continued. “Which you will find to be included in this second, smaller envelope. You may rest assured that you have the only copies of these documents. I certify that these documents are accurate. Should you require any further assistance, you may contact my office directly via the number on my business card. Thank you for your patronage. Sincerely, Oda Wataru.”
Hyde looked at the envelope curiously and found that the seal was still in tact. For whatever reason, Tetsu had not opened the envelope. Gazing at the top of the page, he found it had been over 10 years since the document had been dated. Figuring it would not be any harm to open it, he slid his finger under the flap and broke the plastic security seal. When he dumped out the contents of this one, he found another piece of paper and another envelope, which was not sealed. Unfolding the single sheet of paper, he found it to be another simple document.
“My findings for your investigation are as follows. Your original request was to examine if a Sakurazawa Yasunori was endangering the well being of the lead vocalist, one Takarai Hideto. Please refer to the pictures that have been included with this document for proof of all statements. My investigation has determined that while Sakurazawa is clearly purchasing and abusing illegal substances, he is not doing so in the presence of Takarai. Takarai has not been observed participating in any drug-related activities. On a purely physical level, there does not appear to be any signs of endangerment on the part of Sakurazawa; however, several cases of possible verbal abuse have been observed. It should be noted that the latter of these statements is purely speculation, as these two appear to be intimate with each other. These observed instances may have been ‘lover’s squabbles’. A picture is worth a thousand words and I am certain the evidence will speak for itself. It is therefore, my professional opinion that the results of the investigation indicate that Sakurazawa is not directly endangering the well-being Takarai; however he poses a potential danger to himself as well as those around him should he not seek counseling for his addiction. -Oda Wataru.”
Hyde opened the envelope and what he saw were pictures of Sakura shooting up, frames where Sakura was clearly yelling at him and he was bawling his eyes out, and photos of him kissing and cuddling with Sakura. Hot tears sprung to his eyes and he began shoving the photos back into the envelope, quickly trying to put everything back as it had been and vainly attempting to tell his mind to clear the images from his mind. A million things raced through his mind as he broke out into a cold sweat
“Oh my god, Tetsu sent out a private investigator to find out if Sakura was abusing me? What the hell was he thinking?! He didn’t trust me, is that it?! No, he just was worried-wait, did he suspect Sakura was on drugs? No, that’s not possible. He was shocked when he got the call that Sakura had been arrested. He couldn’t have known what was going on. But he had some idea, right? No, wait, he asked that guy to find out if Sakura was harming me, not to find out if we had drug addictions….So he knows that Sakura and I…? No, that can’t be right. The envelope was sealed. He couldn’t have known. I broke the seal, so…he purposely didn’t open it then…? But it was with all this other stuff of us, so he knew what was inside-he decided at the last second that he didn’t want to know…?”
Hyde felt dizzy and disoriented with this new piece of information. He was so confused that he managed to walk right into another stack of boxes in a largely failed attempt to find the door.
“Ouch…” Hyde groaned, as he rubbed his head and elbow after having tripped on the boxes and their covers.
When he opened his eyes, he found pictures, stuffed soft toys, and letters strewn all over the floor.
“Aww…shit…” he mumbled as he turned the boxes right side up so that he could put everything back.
Crawling over to the right, he saw that one of the boxes had been filled with letters. Scooping up the letters, he shuffled them into a haphazard stack and dumped them into the nearest box. Some of the letters did not have envelopes and he caught bits and pieces of them. Letters from old friends and well wishers made up most of them. Then Hyde came to a bunch of letters that had clearly come from the same person as the envelopes all had the same lavender flower print on them. Thinking that they might have been from an ex-girlfriend, Hyde’s curiosity got the better of him and he pulled one out at random and skimmed the contents of the letter.
“Dear Tetsu….why Ken is so bent on dropping out of school is beyond me…what possessed you to ask such a favor of my son…he was supposed to be an architect!…What the heck is wrong with you…if you really cared about Ken you wouldn’t do this to him…”
Hyde gulped and looked down at the end of the letter to find it was Ken’s mother sending Tetsu these letters. He opened more and found more letters of similar nature. Some of them were angry; some of them were guilt-trip jabs to the bandleader. Clearly, she was upset and had no problem showing it or spending money in the form of postage on sending Tetsu these lengthy letters. There were easily 20 or 30 letters dating from when he first recruited Hyde until right after Sakura left the band. Tetsu had never said anything about Ken’s mother sending him these letters. Hyde doubted even Ken knew about the existence of these persistent letters. Gauging from the content of these letters, it appeared that Tetsu actually never responded to her letters. She mentioned on several occasions that she would continue to send these letters until she got her message across, whatever that was supposed to mean. Hyde guessed Tetsu must have felt guilty because he opened and kept every one of the letters. She used the same letter set, so there was no doubt that each letter was from her. Hyde wondered why Tetsu just did not throw them away after recognizing the stationery, but figured that there must have been a deep reason why he kept them.
He opened another one and skimmed the first few lines.
“It appears you have no intention of ever responding to my letters, Ogawa-san…As Ken’s parents, we have a vested interest in Ken’s future. You have no idea how much we had to suffer just to send Ken to school…”
“Wait a sec,” Hyde thought to himself. “Weren’t Ken’s parents filthy rich?”
Hyde was almost certain that if there was anyone who was the epitome of ‘normal’ or ‘middle-class’, it was Tetsu, not Ken.
“…Am I going senile or something? I know there was that one time I went to Ken’s house…that’s right…he lived in that humongous house in that super nice area of town. And I know he said that he lived in that house all his life. What the hell is his mother talking about then? They seemed pretty well off to me…Hmm…these letters all pretty much say the same thing…’I’ll never forgive you’, ‘This is all your fault’, ‘I blame you for everything’, ‘I hate your guts’…. Wow this lady is nuts…she sounds like a jilted woman…Oh, here’s the last one….”
Hyde opened the last envelope.
“It is all your fault that Ken doesn’t ever come home, nor does he have the decency to call his parents. Why you as his friend did not allow him to just be like everyone else, a skilled professional, but a salaried employee of a large company, some nice safe, upstanding, NORMAL job is beyond me. You dragged him down this wild, ‘alternative’ lifestyle. He’s a good boy and must be miserable doing your bidding. I don’t know why you had to go and bring him into this stupid, childish, selfish dream of yours. I wish he never met you-“
“TETSU’S NOT A BAD PERSON, YOU STUPID WOMAN!” Hyde yelled. “Ken isn’t miserable! Why are you so angry?! Ken is happy! He gets to be on stage doing what he loves…Have you ever been to one of our concerts before or listened to any of our music?! Instead of judging Tetsu and the band and arrogantly labeling Ken as being ‘miserable’ why don’t you take the time out to get to know us?! Geez!….And I’m yelling at a piece of paper….I have lost my mind….I better clean this stuff up and go up to make dinner.”
Hyde sighed in irritation as he put back the letters into their original box. Picking up the other stuff he had knocked over, he found that most of the items were soft toys, figurines, letters, and pictures, some of which were still in their original picture frames. Cocking his neck, he went over to some of the other stacks and piles and found that most of the boxes contained one or more of these things. He stumbled on more clothes-this time they were all of Tetsu’s favorite clothes and accessories-the ones that were pretty much the epitome of girly and pretty. In another box were all his anime and manga otaku merchandise. The more he looked through, the more puzzled he became.
“Why would anyone lock up their favorite things in a room no one uses or sees?” Hyde wondered, as he placed the cover back on another box. He opened more boxes trying to find some reason or answer to his question.
Soon Hyde had gone through almost all of the boxes, covering and restacking them neatly and systematically so he could keep track of which ones he had looked though.
“All this stuff is what Tetsu likes. It’s all his pretty clothes. He hasn’t gained weight or grown taller, so it can’t be an issue of them not fitting…I can understand not wanting to see stuff your ex gave you, but why his figurines and all these other things. Tetsu’s a pretty hard-core otaku, so why would an otaku keep all this stuff in a storage room, not a showcase? It’s not like he has to be embarrassed or that he has to hide his hobbies. Megu doesn’t like my art, says it’s too dark and depressing, but Tetsu doesn’t live with anyone…”
Hyde frowned as he moved the box he had been looking at and revealed the last box of that stack. Lifting the cover, he found that this box had a plastic bin within the cardboard box. Hyde assumed it was to protect it from the elements. Figuring it might be some important documents or the key to why all this stuff was in this room, he opened the bin. He was surprised to find it contained nothing more than a small notebook. The size of the bin was extremely disproportionate to the contents it held. Hyde picked up the bound book and opened it up.
Hyde flipped through and found there were pictures of Tetsu and him between the pages of the notebook from when they first started out. As Hyde flipped through the pages, he noticed that Tetsu had some stuff jotted in between. Most of it was comprised of lines of songs they had been working on at the time, but several pages caught his attention, mostly because they had been written in a different color than the lyrics each time. The lyrics were written in black. These were written in red.
The first one was on a blank page all by itself.
“Our new drummer Sakura likes Hyde. I think Hyde likes him too.”
The next one said:
“Hyde smiled for Sakura. It was so pretty. I’ve never seen him smile like that.”
Followed by more pictures and lyrics, then:
“Why won’t he notice me?”
There were some blank pages after that followed by more lyrics, then:
“I think my love is one-sided.”
And the last entry of the notebook, written on the last page:
“My intuition proves to be correct once again. It must not be meant to be.”
Hyde closed the notebook and returned everything to its former state. When he covered the box, it hit him.
“Could this be all the physical manifestations of the things that Tetsu felt guilty about or wanted to forget but couldn’t erase from his memory…? Stuff he couldn’t bear to throw away, but couldn’t bear to see on a regular basis? Sakura…the letters from Ken’s mother…stuff related to his ex-girlfriends…wait, but that doesn’t explain why all his clothes and otaku goods are down here. Why did he lock his favorite things down here?”
Hyde looked around hoping he had missed something that might provide some insight. He craned his neck and saw there was a large picture frame the size of a movie promotion poster against the wall he had not noticed. He walked over and turned it around to see what it was of. He had just found the answer to his question. It was a poster of Tetsu and his last steady girlfriend, a woman that had a great deal in common with Tetsu, was also obsessed with anime and looked just like an anime character. Tetsu had done a cosplay of Evangelion with her, and had gone to get their photo taken.
Then she cheated on him. He caught her and ended the relationship. Shortly after, Sakura was arrested for drugs and the band was on the brink of disbandment. Around which time, Tetsu suddenly chopped his hair short, stopped going shopping as much, stopped wearing his happy flowery, gaudy, pink, sparkly attire with his platform shoes outside of concerts or when he was in public. He stopped wearing the flowery cologne and he stopped trying to get Hyde to come with him to anime conventions. It was like he suddenly became more masculine and serious. He still acted crazy, but he was not the same. It was almost as if all the things that Tetsu had been, once he had been hurt, were locked them away one by one in this room.
“All these things are painful reminders of the hurt he suffered, aren’t they?” Hyde thought sadly. “The person buried here is the old Tetsu, isn’t it? The more he was hurt, the more he had to end up locking up. He never shared any of this with us. Even though he was dying inside, he grinned and bore it…literally…and as the leader and because none of us had our shit together, he pretended to be strong and forced himself to move forward as he locked bits and pieces of himself away.”
“TETSUUUUUUU!!” Hyde cried, standing up suddenly and bounding up the stairs into the living room, the door slamming loudly behind him. He ran up to Tetsu who was taking a nap on the couch in front of the television and shook him awake, his eyes threatening to spill the welled up tears in the lachrymal ducts.
“Tetsuuuuuuuu,” Hyde wailed. "I’m sorrrrryyyyyyy!!!”
Tetsu only half-awake opened one eye sleepily.
“What’s wrong, Hyde?” he yawned trying to prop himself up on the cushions and failing miserably as his body refused to do what his brain asked.
“I figured out how to open the door and went in and saw everything!!!”
“Why do you look like you’re about to cry?” Tetsu asked, rubbing one eye. “It’s not like you. You sound like a 6-year old kid that just broke his mother’s favorite vase…”
“Tetsuuuu…..”
“All right, calm down. Where were you?”
“I was trying to figure out how to open that door, the one you said had a dead body behind it-“
“Oh yeah, what about it?”
“Well, I got it open, and I know I should’ve told you and gotten your permission, but I saw everything and…I’m sorrryyyyy!!!”
“And that’s why you’re upset?”
“No! You stupid bastard! I…I hurt you and…and….I let you suffer alone….”
“What are you talking about? Hyde…are you on drugs or something?”
“Tetsu! Be serious!”
“I am! You’re the one who’s not making sense!”
“Waaahhh, the person locked up in that room is you, isn’t it? It’s the old you, isn’t it? The ‘dead body’ that resides in that room is the old Tetsu, isn’t it?!! All of the things that you wanted to forget ever happened or existed, but couldn’t are in that room…I saw all those letters!! The clothes!! All the stuff from your previous relationships!! You were hurting inside all these years with no one to ease your burden even though you always lighten ours and that makes me sad!! But even worse is me, who didn’t do anything, didn’t even notice, and couldn’t even offer to share the burden of your pain with you! It’s pathetic and I have failed you as your friend!! I am the lowest creature to walk the face of this earth! I don’t deserve your kindnesssss-‘
“Okay, first, stop sobbing. It just looks really uncool when a 40-year old man is bawling his eyes out to me like that.”
“Aaaauuuggh, and you just always have that gentle smile that-“
“It’s okay, Hyde, I’m okay. Don’t worry about me-“
“You’re just such a strong person…too strong. I know I always get so upset at trivial things to the point where I get so bent out of shape that I can’t go anywhere. I know I’m difficult, hard to please, high-strung, and at times extremely unreasonable. I’m more sensitive than a woman and more selfish than a kid. I am basically a pain in the ass to deal with and I’m sorry that I was so self-absorbed I couldn’t see your pain-”
“Hyde, stop,” Tetsu said gently, bringing Hyde closer to his chest. “I am touched that there is someone in this world who cares enough to shed tears for me. Let the past be. I’m okay, really…”
“Tetsuuuuu….kiss meeee…” Hyde implored with watery eyes.
“Anything for you,” he smiled, brushing his lips against Hyde’s.
“I do love you,” Hyde whispered, leaning into Tetsu, as a final tear made its way down his cheek.
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To be continued...Previous Chapters | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3A | Chapter 3B | Chapter 4A | Chapter 4B | Chapter 5A | Chapter 5B | Chapter 5C | Chapter 5D | Chapter 6A | Chapter 6B | Chapter 7A | Chapter 7B | Chapter 8 |
Author: Mayonaka no Taiyou/ unare_haineko
Pairing: hyde x tetsu
Rating: R-ish overall, but again, this chapter’s definitely NC-17…
Summary: Hyde is having marital problems and Tetsu decides to exploit the opportunity to address his longtime obsession with Hyde.
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WARNING! The author has rated this chapter NC-17 for sexually explicit content. If you are offended by this kind of content, proceed no further. If you have reached this page in error, please click on the ‘Back’ button of your browser at this time.
Hyde returned to Tetsu’s house in the afternoon of the next day.
“I’m back,” Hyde called, removing his shoes at the entrance. “Tetsu?”
Hyde walked past the living room and peered into the kitchen.
“Tetsu?”
There was no answer. Hyde walked to the bedroom and set down his things.
“Tetsu?”
The house was quiet except for the droning of a lone fan that had been left on in the living room.
“TETSU?” Hyde called a little louder.
“Downstairs!” called a muffled voice.
“Where are you?”
“Over here!”
‘Over here’…what does he take me for? Psychic?
Hyde rolled his eyes.
“And this is why you manage the band and I write the lyrics,” mumbled Hyde as he started down the stairs.
“Have you slept?” Hyde called, picking up random objects as he made his way to the lower level-jacket on the railing, socks at the bottom of the stairs, a bottle of water on the chair, and a packet of tissues next to a bag of marbles in the middle of the wood floor.
“No,” Tetsu called. “Did you go out or something?”
“Yeah, I went back home.”
“Really? How come you came back so soon?”
“I went home to go look at the hose that was supposedly leaking or flooding our garden…”
Hyde bent down to pick up the bag of marbles, which unfortunately had a hole in it, so when he picked it up, they all spilled out from the side, scattering all over the open floor.
“Damn it,” Hyde muttered, as he chased after the marbles.
“Did you fix it?”
“No, I called the gardener, who I found out was the incompetent one who broke it in the first place.”
“So what’d you do?”
“I called the landscaper for a referral. He told me he’d call someone to take a look at it, but he called back and told us that his guy couldn’t come out until morning. He came at five this morning to work on it. We had to take Rei to baseball practice at seven…and on the way back, we got into a fight…”
Hyde felt like a kid as he placed another marble in the hem on his shirt. He had about thirty of the fifty that had scattered.
“What about?”
“Everything and nothing. I’ll spare you the details. Long story short, she told me I was a crappy father. I told her to stop interfering with my work since I’m the only one working unless she wants to go back to work. I told her I was willing to pay for a nanny for Rei.”
As Hyde picked up the last red marble, he came upon a door that he had not noticed previously. What set this door apart from the others was that this door was painted the same off white as the walls. Tetsu’s other doors on the basement floor were a similar shade of light mahogany to match the wood floor. Hyde tried the knob and found it was locked.
“Tetsu?” Hyde said, overjoyed that he had found a plastic bag on the table and was now dumping the marbles into the zip pouch receptacle.
“Hmm?” Tetsu called absently.
“What’s in here?” Hyde asked, pointing to the door in question.
“Huh?” Tetsu poked his head out of the music room. “Oh. A dead body.”
“What?!”
“Don’t worry about it,” Tetsu said in a serious voice. “He won’t bother you. But just for a good measure, I’ve locked the door…And why are you…wet…?”
“Megu got angry at the end and threw a bucket of water at me.”
“Is that supposed to deter negative behavior or something? What does she take you for-a cat?”
“But more importantly…Come on, seriously, Tetsu, what’s really in there?”
“I told you, a dead body.”
“Right just like how you told everyone my real name is Doi Hachiro-which I might add, is the worst fake name you could have given me! Come on, what’s really in there?”
Hyde was getting impatient and his curiosity was becoming more and more apparent.
“Nothing,” Tetsu replied, putting away his bass and closing the door to the music room. “Don’t worry about it. It’s nothing of interest to you.”
Tetsu shrugged and started to walk up the stairs.
“Oooh, but if it’s nothing, then why is it locked??!” Hyde asked bouncing after him like a kitten on a sugar rush.
“I dunno, too lazy to unlock it. Why do you wanna know so bad anyway?” Tetsu asked, as they reached to top of the stairs onto his main floor. “Do you have a thing for locked doors or something?”
“No,” Hyde said quickly, plopping himself onto the couch and suddenly finding the cushions very interesting.
“You do, don’t you?” Tetsu grinned impishly.
“No, I don’t!”
“Yes, you do! You have a thing for locked doors! Secrets bother you and you wanna know what’s behind that door, don’t you?”
“No, I don’t!” Hyde cut in. “I’m not curious. See, here I am just watching TV. Look at me; I don’t care.”
Tetsu rolled his eyes and Hyde tried (mostly in vain) to try and gain back the upper hand by feigning disinterest.
“Well, I guess you’ll never know what’s behind that door since there’s no key for it,” Tetsu teased in a singsong voice.
“There’s no key?!”
“Aha! So you do want to know!” Tetsu said, jumping onto the cushion next to Hyde, causing his pouting princess to bounce with the intrusion.
“No, I don’t!” Hyde protested, turning away as Tetsu played with a loose tendril of Hyde’s long, sleek hair. “But how are you supposed to open the door with no key?! I saw the keyhole!”
“Well, I guess since it doesn’t bother you, it doesn’t matter right?” Tetsu said, kissing Hyde on the cheek.
“Tetsuuu!!” Hyde whined.
“There’s nothing in there, I told you! Only a dead body! Don’t think about it. Really, there’s nothing of interest to see in there.”
Tetsu looked at Hyde’s pleading face.
“Oh, all right. If you can figure out how to open it without BREAKING IT DOWN, you can see what’s inside.”
“Yaay, huh?-open it without breaking it down?”
“Yeah. Figure out how to open it and you can see that there’s nothing behind that door. I’ll give you a hint, so you don’t ransack my house looking for a key. That door is the only door that can open without a key.”
0-0-0-0-0
Over the next few days, Hyde became obsessed with the locked door. Tetsu found the situation to be rather amusing, so he pushed the armchair from the music room out to sit in while Hyde tried to figure out how to open the door. While Hyde tried everything from pounding on the door to picking the lock, Tetsu managed to read nearly three novels. Today was another attempt at picking the lock.
“You’re really not good at lock-picking, are you?” Tetsu commented from behind his magazine.
“Shut up,” Hyde said as he inserted a weird looking screwdriver tip into the keyhole.
“Have you ever picked a lock successfully, Hyde?”
“No, why? Is it that obvious?”
“Yes,” Tetsu said, placing the subscription card that fell on his lap on the floor.
“Have you?” asked Hyde, jiggling the screwdriver in hopes that something would unlock.
“Picked my first one when I was eight years old,” Tetsu replied, taking a sip of iced tea as he turned the page.
“Are you serious?” Hyde said, pulling the screwdriver out and tossing it into the cardboard box he had of ‘useless tools’ hanging out in front of the door.
“Yeah. I lost the key to my showcase and I wanted to put my newly finished model into it, so I picked the lock.”
“Shut up, no way.”
“Wait here,” Tetsu set his magazine on the chair and disappeared in the music room. He returned with a small toolbox.
“Here’s a standard padlock and a combination lock. Pull on them. They’re locked,” Tetsu said, handing them to Hyde. Hyde tested them and handed them back to Tetsu. “I’ll do the padlock first.”
Tetsu took out a paperclip and inserted it into the keyhole. After less than thirty seconds, the spring triggered and the padlock was released.
“Here…Okay, now I’ll do the combination.”
Tetsu placed his ear next to the combination lock and turned the knob several times. Just as quickly, before Hyde could respond, he had the combination one open.
“You knew the combination to that one,” Hyde said accusingly.
“But, I wasn’t looking at the numbers when I cracked the combination one. My memory’s not so good and these days, it’s hard to keep track and remember them all.”
“Remember them all?”
“See,” Tetsu turned the box around to reveal that the entire box was filled with padlocks and combination locks that were physically identical. “I just chose one randomly…”
“You’re too much…” Hyde murmured. “Bah, I think I should give up.”
“Already?” Tetsu teased. “You’re ready to give up already?”
“I think those nimble fingers of yours could be put to better use. Oh! Wait! I’ve got another idea!”
Hyde stood up and scrambled over to the door. He stood in front of the door and stared at it for several seconds.
When he opened it out, he belted, “Koware sou na, supiido agete-“
“Why are you singing ‘Heaven’s Drive’?” asked Tetsu.
“Barabara ni chirabaru hanabira…muchuu de, hayaku, kakenukete kita…toki wo kanadete omoi wa afureru…kawaita kaze wo karamase…meguri kuru toki ni…HIRAKE GOMA!!!-“
“As lovely of a medley that was of ‘Flower’, ‘Ready Steady Go’, ‘Niji’, ‘Honey’, and ‘Blurry Eyes’, the door’s not voice activated, so the last part about ‘open sesame’ will not work, Hyde.”
“Oh, okay, well then I give up,” he said. “Let’s go to bed…”
0-0-0-0-0
After a few more days of fruitless fiddling, Hyde appeared to have given up. The only breakthrough that Hyde had made was that the door was heavy and that probably no amount of force short of a typhoon could break it down. Discouraged, Hyde had no choice but to return to the normal schedule of work, eating, sleeping, and sex.
Then, one afternoon while Tetsu was taking a nap, Hyde came out of the music room after having written a song. Strolling down the hallway, something about the way the light had caught on the chandelier caused him to look at the secret door. Walking to the ‘secret room’, he squinted at the door. It was at this time when he noticed that one of the square panels looked odd. The door was painted like the walls, but it had eight square panels, four rows of two, equally spaced, cut about three or four centimeters deep into the door. What he had not noticed previously was how well those panels were cut into the door.
Hyde ran his fingers lightly over the panels located in the middle of the door. They were solid, but something did not feel right. Hyde reached up to the upper left one and brushed against it. The panel seemed to be loose when Hyde touched it. Hyde pushed it to the left. Nothing. He pushed it to the right. Nothing.
Hmm....
Hyde craned his neck to the right and noticed that embedded in the doorframe was a small button at the same level as the top left panel. When he pressed it, he heard something click and saw the panel vibrate slightly. Hyde pushed the left panel horizontally and was disappointed when it did not open. Then, he pushed it up just to see if anything would happen. He was surprised when the thin panel slid up easily five centimeters revealing a dial lock embedded within the door.
Of course, leave it to Tetsu to safeguard it with puzzles.
Hyde saw that the dials were of katakana set at ‘A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A’.
Eight dials…what would be eight characters? Ogawa Tetsuya? O-ga-wa-Te-tsu-ya…No that’s only six…wait a minute!
Hyde knew what word was eight characters.
RA-RU-KU-A-N-SHI-E-RU
When Hyde slide the final ‘ru’ into place, he heard a bolt released. He looked to the right panel. He slid it up and found another dial lock with katakana set at ‘A-A-A-A-A-A’.
This one must be Ogawa Tetsuya.
O-GA-WA-TE-TSU-YA.
The sound of a bolt dropping from the right led Hyde to believe that the next panel was the second on the right. He pushed the panel up. Nothing. When he pushed it to the right, it slid to reveal another dial lock with numbers set at ‘’0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0’.
This must be his birthday.
1-9-6-9-1-0-0-3.
The next panel was a dial lock of Roman alphabets set at ‘A-A-A-A’.
Hyde took a guess and set it to ‘B-A-S-S.’ Another panel opened. This one showed a dial lock with a mixture of Roman alphabets and numbers set at ‘A-A-A-A-A-0-0’.
T-E-T-S-U-6-9?
The next one had only four numbers to figure out. Hyde knew that the last three panels must be something tricky, but still he tried the obvious ones for the four digit dial lock.
1-1-1-1? Nope. 0-1-2-3. Nope. 1-2-3-4.
Hyde felt that to save time, since there were only four numbers, he would just go in numerical order. About twenty minutes later, the panel opened at 0-1-2-9.
What an odd number. That’s not his bank PIN…what’s so significant about 0-1-2-9? Well, whatever.
Hyde came to the final two panels. The one on the bottom right had a dial lock with Roman alphabets set at ‘A-A-A-A’.
Well, it's probably not 'B-A-S-S'...Four letter word...?
Hyde pushed the first one up and down as he struggled to think of the word Tetsu might have chosen. As he turned the dial, it suddenly stopped and something unlocked. Hyde looked at where it had stopped.
H? Does the word start with H?
Hyde turned the second dial to ‘Y’ and heard even more movement coming from within the door.
H-Y-D-E…
It sounded like cogs and wheels were turning from within the door. Hyde waited as the door appeared to be unlocking itself, its final act opened the last panel revealing nothing underneath the thin piece of wood. Hyde tried the doorknob. It was still locked much to his disappointment.
How does this door open?!
Hyde ran his fingers against it and knocked on it, but it was to no avail. Then he remembered how the first panel had opened. When he looked around the frame, he saw that there was another button next on the bottom of the door, just like the upper level panel. When he pressed it, the sound of a huge deadbolt unlocking reverberated through the door. Hyde turned the knob and the heavy door gave way.
Hyde walked in and found it was a room with no furniture-only boxes and piles of stuff. It looked like a storage room.
“But why would he lock it?” wondered Hyde, as he opened the closet. Peering inside the closet, he saw that it had been filled with all of Tetsu’s old Indies clothes on one side. On the other side, Hyde poked around the ground and found some old hats, makeup, accessories, and shoes. He noted that this was where Tetsu was storing all his platform shoes also. So far, it just appeared that Tetsu had been using it to store all the things he could not bear to part with from the good old days. When Hyde closed the closet door, he turned around and accidentally knocked one of the stacks of small boxes down, spilling the contents of the box on the top, which had not been closed.
Hyde first straightened the stack and then bent down to pick up what had been scattered all over the carpeted floor. It had been mostly papers and photos. Picking some up and examining them closely, he saw that the box he had dropped was filled with photos, newspaper and magazine clippings, and other memorabilia of him (Hyde) and Sakura. The picture that Hyde picked up first was attached to a magazine article and had him sitting on Sakura’s lap staring straight forward innocently as Sakura held him from behind. There were others. Sakura half naked and carrying him, Sakura pressing himself up against him, him centimeters from Sakura’s face, close enough to kiss him.
While they were only fan service photos from magazines and calendars, Hyde quickly shoved all the clippings and photos back into the folder as if he did not want to be reminded about this part of his past. Tetsu never asked him about Sakura, not when Sakura left, not a word about it until this very day. He did not even ask about Hyde’s previous lovers or even about Megumi. Hyde, on the other hand, despite having the full knowledge that Tetsu would hand him his heart on a silver platter had he asked, was quite the jealous lover. When he demanded to know about Tetsu’s past, Tetsu had told him everything he wanted to know. Since Tetsu did not bother covering anything up (including the fact that he sometimes could not remember the name of whatever it was he dragged home), Hyde really had no right to complain (though he had been initially shocked to say the least that he was not the first man that had ever been in Tetsu’s bed).
When he was shoving the Hyde-Sakura stuff back into the box, Hyde noticed that an envelope, about the size of a sheet of printing paper folded in half vertically, that had fallen out also. He picked it up. Finding it to be quite heavy, he turned it around to read what had been written on the front.
“OGAWA TETSUYA-SAMA” it read in large printed characters.
He turned the envelope over and found it had been opened. Hyde shrugged and lifted the flap. Inside was a piece of paper and another envelope. He shook the contents out and unfolded the letter.
“Ogawa Tetsuya-sama,” he read silently. “I have completed my investigation. And, as you have requested, I have placed the results of my intensive investigation in a plain envelope within this one along with a cover sheet and have marked it accordingly.”
Hyde looked at the smaller envelope, which he turned over and found to read, “THE ANSWER TO YOUR QUESTION.”
“I have substantial proof to support my analysis,” he continued. “Which you will find to be included in this second, smaller envelope. You may rest assured that you have the only copies of these documents. I certify that these documents are accurate. Should you require any further assistance, you may contact my office directly via the number on my business card. Thank you for your patronage. Sincerely, Oda Wataru.”
Hyde looked at the envelope curiously and found that the seal was still in tact. For whatever reason, Tetsu had not opened the envelope. Gazing at the top of the page, he found it had been over 10 years since the document had been dated. Figuring it would not be any harm to open it, he slid his finger under the flap and broke the plastic security seal. When he dumped out the contents of this one, he found another piece of paper and another envelope, which was not sealed. Unfolding the single sheet of paper, he found it to be another simple document.
“My findings for your investigation are as follows. Your original request was to examine if a Sakurazawa Yasunori was endangering the well being of the lead vocalist, one Takarai Hideto. Please refer to the pictures that have been included with this document for proof of all statements. My investigation has determined that while Sakurazawa is clearly purchasing and abusing illegal substances, he is not doing so in the presence of Takarai. Takarai has not been observed participating in any drug-related activities. On a purely physical level, there does not appear to be any signs of endangerment on the part of Sakurazawa; however, several cases of possible verbal abuse have been observed. It should be noted that the latter of these statements is purely speculation, as these two appear to be intimate with each other. These observed instances may have been ‘lover’s squabbles’. A picture is worth a thousand words and I am certain the evidence will speak for itself. It is therefore, my professional opinion that the results of the investigation indicate that Sakurazawa is not directly endangering the well-being Takarai; however he poses a potential danger to himself as well as those around him should he not seek counseling for his addiction. -Oda Wataru.”
Hyde opened the envelope and what he saw were pictures of Sakura shooting up, frames where Sakura was clearly yelling at him and he was bawling his eyes out, and photos of him kissing and cuddling with Sakura. Hot tears sprung to his eyes and he began shoving the photos back into the envelope, quickly trying to put everything back as it had been and vainly attempting to tell his mind to clear the images from his mind. A million things raced through his mind as he broke out into a cold sweat
“Oh my god, Tetsu sent out a private investigator to find out if Sakura was abusing me? What the hell was he thinking?! He didn’t trust me, is that it?! No, he just was worried-wait, did he suspect Sakura was on drugs? No, that’s not possible. He was shocked when he got the call that Sakura had been arrested. He couldn’t have known what was going on. But he had some idea, right? No, wait, he asked that guy to find out if Sakura was harming me, not to find out if we had drug addictions….So he knows that Sakura and I…? No, that can’t be right. The envelope was sealed. He couldn’t have known. I broke the seal, so…he purposely didn’t open it then…? But it was with all this other stuff of us, so he knew what was inside-he decided at the last second that he didn’t want to know…?”
Hyde felt dizzy and disoriented with this new piece of information. He was so confused that he managed to walk right into another stack of boxes in a largely failed attempt to find the door.
“Ouch…” Hyde groaned, as he rubbed his head and elbow after having tripped on the boxes and their covers.
When he opened his eyes, he found pictures, stuffed soft toys, and letters strewn all over the floor.
“Aww…shit…” he mumbled as he turned the boxes right side up so that he could put everything back.
Crawling over to the right, he saw that one of the boxes had been filled with letters. Scooping up the letters, he shuffled them into a haphazard stack and dumped them into the nearest box. Some of the letters did not have envelopes and he caught bits and pieces of them. Letters from old friends and well wishers made up most of them. Then Hyde came to a bunch of letters that had clearly come from the same person as the envelopes all had the same lavender flower print on them. Thinking that they might have been from an ex-girlfriend, Hyde’s curiosity got the better of him and he pulled one out at random and skimmed the contents of the letter.
“Dear Tetsu….why Ken is so bent on dropping out of school is beyond me…what possessed you to ask such a favor of my son…he was supposed to be an architect!…What the heck is wrong with you…if you really cared about Ken you wouldn’t do this to him…”
Hyde gulped and looked down at the end of the letter to find it was Ken’s mother sending Tetsu these letters. He opened more and found more letters of similar nature. Some of them were angry; some of them were guilt-trip jabs to the bandleader. Clearly, she was upset and had no problem showing it or spending money in the form of postage on sending Tetsu these lengthy letters. There were easily 20 or 30 letters dating from when he first recruited Hyde until right after Sakura left the band. Tetsu had never said anything about Ken’s mother sending him these letters. Hyde doubted even Ken knew about the existence of these persistent letters. Gauging from the content of these letters, it appeared that Tetsu actually never responded to her letters. She mentioned on several occasions that she would continue to send these letters until she got her message across, whatever that was supposed to mean. Hyde guessed Tetsu must have felt guilty because he opened and kept every one of the letters. She used the same letter set, so there was no doubt that each letter was from her. Hyde wondered why Tetsu just did not throw them away after recognizing the stationery, but figured that there must have been a deep reason why he kept them.
He opened another one and skimmed the first few lines.
“It appears you have no intention of ever responding to my letters, Ogawa-san…As Ken’s parents, we have a vested interest in Ken’s future. You have no idea how much we had to suffer just to send Ken to school…”
“Wait a sec,” Hyde thought to himself. “Weren’t Ken’s parents filthy rich?”
Hyde was almost certain that if there was anyone who was the epitome of ‘normal’ or ‘middle-class’, it was Tetsu, not Ken.
“…Am I going senile or something? I know there was that one time I went to Ken’s house…that’s right…he lived in that humongous house in that super nice area of town. And I know he said that he lived in that house all his life. What the hell is his mother talking about then? They seemed pretty well off to me…Hmm…these letters all pretty much say the same thing…’I’ll never forgive you’, ‘This is all your fault’, ‘I blame you for everything’, ‘I hate your guts’…. Wow this lady is nuts…she sounds like a jilted woman…Oh, here’s the last one….”
Hyde opened the last envelope.
“It is all your fault that Ken doesn’t ever come home, nor does he have the decency to call his parents. Why you as his friend did not allow him to just be like everyone else, a skilled professional, but a salaried employee of a large company, some nice safe, upstanding, NORMAL job is beyond me. You dragged him down this wild, ‘alternative’ lifestyle. He’s a good boy and must be miserable doing your bidding. I don’t know why you had to go and bring him into this stupid, childish, selfish dream of yours. I wish he never met you-“
“TETSU’S NOT A BAD PERSON, YOU STUPID WOMAN!” Hyde yelled. “Ken isn’t miserable! Why are you so angry?! Ken is happy! He gets to be on stage doing what he loves…Have you ever been to one of our concerts before or listened to any of our music?! Instead of judging Tetsu and the band and arrogantly labeling Ken as being ‘miserable’ why don’t you take the time out to get to know us?! Geez!….And I’m yelling at a piece of paper….I have lost my mind….I better clean this stuff up and go up to make dinner.”
Hyde sighed in irritation as he put back the letters into their original box. Picking up the other stuff he had knocked over, he found that most of the items were soft toys, figurines, letters, and pictures, some of which were still in their original picture frames. Cocking his neck, he went over to some of the other stacks and piles and found that most of the boxes contained one or more of these things. He stumbled on more clothes-this time they were all of Tetsu’s favorite clothes and accessories-the ones that were pretty much the epitome of girly and pretty. In another box were all his anime and manga otaku merchandise. The more he looked through, the more puzzled he became.
“Why would anyone lock up their favorite things in a room no one uses or sees?” Hyde wondered, as he placed the cover back on another box. He opened more boxes trying to find some reason or answer to his question.
Soon Hyde had gone through almost all of the boxes, covering and restacking them neatly and systematically so he could keep track of which ones he had looked though.
“All this stuff is what Tetsu likes. It’s all his pretty clothes. He hasn’t gained weight or grown taller, so it can’t be an issue of them not fitting…I can understand not wanting to see stuff your ex gave you, but why his figurines and all these other things. Tetsu’s a pretty hard-core otaku, so why would an otaku keep all this stuff in a storage room, not a showcase? It’s not like he has to be embarrassed or that he has to hide his hobbies. Megu doesn’t like my art, says it’s too dark and depressing, but Tetsu doesn’t live with anyone…”
Hyde frowned as he moved the box he had been looking at and revealed the last box of that stack. Lifting the cover, he found that this box had a plastic bin within the cardboard box. Hyde assumed it was to protect it from the elements. Figuring it might be some important documents or the key to why all this stuff was in this room, he opened the bin. He was surprised to find it contained nothing more than a small notebook. The size of the bin was extremely disproportionate to the contents it held. Hyde picked up the bound book and opened it up.
Hyde flipped through and found there were pictures of Tetsu and him between the pages of the notebook from when they first started out. As Hyde flipped through the pages, he noticed that Tetsu had some stuff jotted in between. Most of it was comprised of lines of songs they had been working on at the time, but several pages caught his attention, mostly because they had been written in a different color than the lyrics each time. The lyrics were written in black. These were written in red.
The first one was on a blank page all by itself.
“Our new drummer Sakura likes Hyde. I think Hyde likes him too.”
The next one said:
“Hyde smiled for Sakura. It was so pretty. I’ve never seen him smile like that.”
Followed by more pictures and lyrics, then:
“Why won’t he notice me?”
There were some blank pages after that followed by more lyrics, then:
“I think my love is one-sided.”
And the last entry of the notebook, written on the last page:
“My intuition proves to be correct once again. It must not be meant to be.”
Hyde closed the notebook and returned everything to its former state. When he covered the box, it hit him.
“Could this be all the physical manifestations of the things that Tetsu felt guilty about or wanted to forget but couldn’t erase from his memory…? Stuff he couldn’t bear to throw away, but couldn’t bear to see on a regular basis? Sakura…the letters from Ken’s mother…stuff related to his ex-girlfriends…wait, but that doesn’t explain why all his clothes and otaku goods are down here. Why did he lock his favorite things down here?”
Hyde looked around hoping he had missed something that might provide some insight. He craned his neck and saw there was a large picture frame the size of a movie promotion poster against the wall he had not noticed. He walked over and turned it around to see what it was of. He had just found the answer to his question. It was a poster of Tetsu and his last steady girlfriend, a woman that had a great deal in common with Tetsu, was also obsessed with anime and looked just like an anime character. Tetsu had done a cosplay of Evangelion with her, and had gone to get their photo taken.
Then she cheated on him. He caught her and ended the relationship. Shortly after, Sakura was arrested for drugs and the band was on the brink of disbandment. Around which time, Tetsu suddenly chopped his hair short, stopped going shopping as much, stopped wearing his happy flowery, gaudy, pink, sparkly attire with his platform shoes outside of concerts or when he was in public. He stopped wearing the flowery cologne and he stopped trying to get Hyde to come with him to anime conventions. It was like he suddenly became more masculine and serious. He still acted crazy, but he was not the same. It was almost as if all the things that Tetsu had been, once he had been hurt, were locked them away one by one in this room.
“All these things are painful reminders of the hurt he suffered, aren’t they?” Hyde thought sadly. “The person buried here is the old Tetsu, isn’t it? The more he was hurt, the more he had to end up locking up. He never shared any of this with us. Even though he was dying inside, he grinned and bore it…literally…and as the leader and because none of us had our shit together, he pretended to be strong and forced himself to move forward as he locked bits and pieces of himself away.”
“TETSUUUUUUU!!” Hyde cried, standing up suddenly and bounding up the stairs into the living room, the door slamming loudly behind him. He ran up to Tetsu who was taking a nap on the couch in front of the television and shook him awake, his eyes threatening to spill the welled up tears in the lachrymal ducts.
“Tetsuuuuuuuu,” Hyde wailed. "I’m sorrrrryyyyyyy!!!”
Tetsu only half-awake opened one eye sleepily.
“What’s wrong, Hyde?” he yawned trying to prop himself up on the cushions and failing miserably as his body refused to do what his brain asked.
“I figured out how to open the door and went in and saw everything!!!”
“Why do you look like you’re about to cry?” Tetsu asked, rubbing one eye. “It’s not like you. You sound like a 6-year old kid that just broke his mother’s favorite vase…”
“Tetsuuuu…..”
“All right, calm down. Where were you?”
“I was trying to figure out how to open that door, the one you said had a dead body behind it-“
“Oh yeah, what about it?”
“Well, I got it open, and I know I should’ve told you and gotten your permission, but I saw everything and…I’m sorrryyyyy!!!”
“And that’s why you’re upset?”
“No! You stupid bastard! I…I hurt you and…and….I let you suffer alone….”
“What are you talking about? Hyde…are you on drugs or something?”
“Tetsu! Be serious!”
“I am! You’re the one who’s not making sense!”
“Waaahhh, the person locked up in that room is you, isn’t it? It’s the old you, isn’t it? The ‘dead body’ that resides in that room is the old Tetsu, isn’t it?!! All of the things that you wanted to forget ever happened or existed, but couldn’t are in that room…I saw all those letters!! The clothes!! All the stuff from your previous relationships!! You were hurting inside all these years with no one to ease your burden even though you always lighten ours and that makes me sad!! But even worse is me, who didn’t do anything, didn’t even notice, and couldn’t even offer to share the burden of your pain with you! It’s pathetic and I have failed you as your friend!! I am the lowest creature to walk the face of this earth! I don’t deserve your kindnesssss-‘
“Okay, first, stop sobbing. It just looks really uncool when a 40-year old man is bawling his eyes out to me like that.”
“Aaaauuuggh, and you just always have that gentle smile that-“
“It’s okay, Hyde, I’m okay. Don’t worry about me-“
“You’re just such a strong person…too strong. I know I always get so upset at trivial things to the point where I get so bent out of shape that I can’t go anywhere. I know I’m difficult, hard to please, high-strung, and at times extremely unreasonable. I’m more sensitive than a woman and more selfish than a kid. I am basically a pain in the ass to deal with and I’m sorry that I was so self-absorbed I couldn’t see your pain-”
“Hyde, stop,” Tetsu said gently, bringing Hyde closer to his chest. “I am touched that there is someone in this world who cares enough to shed tears for me. Let the past be. I’m okay, really…”
“Tetsuuuuu….kiss meeee…” Hyde implored with watery eyes.
“Anything for you,” he smiled, brushing his lips against Hyde’s.
“I do love you,” Hyde whispered, leaning into Tetsu, as a final tear made its way down his cheek.
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To be continued...Previous Chapters | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3A | Chapter 3B | Chapter 4A | Chapter 4B | Chapter 5A | Chapter 5B | Chapter 5C | Chapter 5D | Chapter 6A | Chapter 6B | Chapter 7A | Chapter 7B | Chapter 8 |