Breakfast With a Side of Hopelessness

[lethechained]

Characters:  Naminé (lethechained)
Setting: Floor 1, the cafeteria
Format: Starting this way, will match.
Summary: Naminé's been spending most of the event trying to fight the experiment effects, but it looks like it's a battle she's losing. (Attempting to fight transition to Stage 3.)
Warnings: Angst, hopelessness, lethargy. She's still got enough of a handle on

Comments

[prayerless]

The last time she had been this jumpy had been at the peak of her journey through the realm of darkness (then again, was it really a "journey" if you had no true destination), when the danger was greatest. She'd been driving herself mad more than the actual paranoia had been, trying to figure out why it had suddenly gotten her in its clutches so badly. But it felt like every time she tried to rationalize, she just...couldn't. Every conclusion led her to blame that felt more and more ridiculous each time it arose.

Finally she was able to blame something that felt entirely fair to be blaming: the Tower. This place was making her feel this way. It took off the edge that being around other people brought her, just a little. Gave her something to focus on.

So Aqua was investigating. She was investigating everything. Every floor, every object, every nook, every cranny. And eventually, she came to the cafeteria, scraps of paper (scavenged from one of the floors, as the only paper in her trunk was bound in her spellbooks) and a pencil in

I WANTED TO RESPOND TO HER OPEN POST but Namine is kind of um. Not in a wandering state. :C

[lethechained]

Naminé did not look up when she first heard someone else coming; they probably weren't looking for her, anyway, (not that they should have been), and... to be honest, she was ashamed. She was ashamed to look this way, to fail to stop herself from being so hopeless when she knew it would make other people feel worse, too, even if by all rights they should be. But when she heard her name, her low lidded eyes widened ever so slightly. Nothing she said would be able to help, but-- she was being addressed, and she had no intention of leaving anyone in the cold, even if it didn't really mean anything

I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND, group D lethargy is the reason i haven't tagged with England either

[prayerless]

Aqua waited for Naminé to gather herself (as Aqua had no doubts that the blonde girl was afflicted by the tower, as well), but when it seemed that Naminé was as gathered as she was going to get, Aqua put on a concerned expression. She looked...very upset-- the kind of upset that someone who was coping with a great loss would have, something similar to that. Sort of...hopeless-seeming, in that way

PHEW good. ;A; I keep feeling like I should be doing more but fdgjdbgjbkdf dat lethargy.

[lethechained]

What was wrong? For a moment, Naminé was taken aback. Had she been wrong to assume that Ven had told Aqua about what had transpired? Surely Aqua would not have seemed concerned about her if she believed Naminé was a traitor. Despite this, the girl couldn't help glancing at the Keyblade briefly before looking back at the older woman - the weapon was still there, after all.

What was wrong.... Everything, maybe? But perhaps it was better to start at the beginning. "...It's the experiments." She would just have to hope (hah, as if) that Aqua would not come to the same conclusion Ven did. Or, rather, maybe Naminé should have hoped just the opposite; that way, no matter what happened, it would be easier on Aqua. One less person to worry about. "I'm in group D." That wasn't an explanation, really, but more of a preface.

i know, i feel the same ;n; sob what is CR

[prayerless]

The experiments. That was the second time now that Aqua was hearing about them. Ven had known something, and now Naminé was saying she did, as well. Were they trying to keep something from her? Maybe that was how Ven had made this new friend of his; maybe they were both--

No. Stop it. Aqua didn't know Naminé very well, but Ven would never turn his back on her.

...not willingly, at least. But maybe...maybe he had been brainwashed. Maybe Naminé had brainwashed him. Maybe the tower had brainwashed the both of them, and that was why

That thing that doesn't really exist apparently--

[lethechained]

The pause was not missed by Naminé, but she had no outward reaction of her own. She wasn't a mind reader, only a memory reader, and though she could probably have found out what was on Aqua's mind by looking at her most recent memories, she did not. She didn't do things like that, at least not anymore. She'd spent so long using her powers because that was what she had to do, but now... now, she had decided it was for the best that she didn't, at least not until she had found the right way to use them. More and more, she'd realized that some things were better left unsaid, and in the end, going prying in someone's memories would probably only cause trouble

oh, so is it like, some kind of mythological creature or something

[prayerless]

Aqua listened dutifully as Naminé spoke. Was the fact that Naminé was saying all this part of her plot? She was telling Aqua this stuff so that Aqua would know the experiment was working, and she was falling straight into the trap, and this was all part of some amusement gambit--

That got less and less likely the more she listened to herself think about it. (Were you even supposed to be able to listen to yourself think, really?) She frowned, lifting her Keyblade-- but not into an offensive position. She merely held it diagonally, lifting the teeth so that she could look at it thoughtfully. "I've felt differently too," she confessed. So maybe she was succumbing to some ploy for the sake of someone else's entertainment by admitting to it, but dear lord, if she tried to think up a plan to foil a plot that she wasn't even sure existed, she really would go crazy. Crazier? Yeah, that sounded more accurate

yeah, sounds about right. I know I've never seen it /what

[lethechained]

Naminé almost flinched as the Keyblade was raised, but not quite. What Aqua mentioned made a few puzzle pieces click into place. Worrying a lot? And suspecting everyone-- that did sound like what Ven was doing. It had made sense at the time because of her own fears, but just as she'd begun to suspect afterwards, it did sound like there was a distinct possibility that it was because of their experiment group. "It could be different for you because we're in different groups."

But it was true; there was a lot to be suspicious of. Everything was dangerous, here, and at any moment they could be kidnapped (did it even count as kidnapping when they were already prisoners), or killed, or forced to do who-knew-what. Even though she was well aware that both their concerns were caused or at least fed by the experiments, they were still legitimate. It was only a matter of time. "But-- it's true. This place is dangerous." Not that keeping her guard up would do much, anyway. "I don't think that there is a way to stay safe."

i never have either ): i'm not magically inclined

[prayerless]

Aqua frowned, lowering the blade to instead tug at the tubing on her collar; she wondered what the liquid inside was. She knew she couldn't take the collar off (she had tried that upon arrival), but could she cut the tubing? She'd never tried before. But then, that had never occurred to her before; a lot of things were occurring to her now that she'd never previously given a passing thought about

:C

[lethechained]

She was having trouble trusting Ven, too? It was horrible, even though Naminé couldn't help thinking that that was justified, too, because she was all too well aware that there was such a thing as cloning, and such a thing as clones that were not aware that they were clones. But Naminé knew that Ven was the real Ven, or at least had been when they'd met for the first time in the tower (unless he was a very convincing fake); it was one of the exceedingly few times since she'd come to the tower that she'd ever seen fit to use any of her unusual abilities.

Naminé was not, in her present state, inclined to give the tower the benefit of the doubt. And yet... once again she felt a spark of that desire to help, to make someone feel better. It was cruel, it was wrong, it was foolish - there was no hope, so why should she dare suggest to someone that they should cling to what of their own invalid optimism they might still possess? But

and then people start hunting CR like they do Bigfoot

[prayerless]

She was glad for her upbringing. Master Eraqus raised her as a soldier, a valiant knight of the light. The most important thing that she had been taught was control. She had to control her Keyblade when she fought; she had to control her magic, lest it go wild and injure her or people close to her; she had to control herself, otherwise control over anything else was rendered useless. She had never really noticed before just how deeply ingrained it was, though. If not for her habits, she'd be accusing people and attacking things left and right.

Aqua's eyebrows knitted together in thought after a moment, gaze settled upon Naminé. "So do you think it's right to feel hopeless?" the young master eventually questioned. Unlike Naminé, Aqua had no qualms about encouraging a more optimistic view, aside from the preemptive inability to do so that came from mostly avoiding people on the whole.

^ Although I'm not sure how they're going to get and/or fake film, since it's invisible.

[lethechained]

Naminé knew from the look on Aqua's face that what she said next might be trouble. As it turned out, it could have been worse. Still, it was such a shameful thing to admit, even if she did believe it (or at least part of her believed it). For so long, she'd tried to remember to keep a brave face for other people, and although she'd had her failures, none were so thorough as this. But... that feeling was unrelenting, and truthfully, there was no logical chance for them to escape. Not with control so complete in the hands of their captors.

"...Yes." Although her discomfort with saying so was obvious. "I just... don't see a way out. Not when they can make us do things against our will." Her hands clenched, her eyes even sadder than before. It was so much harder to so much as believe that there was somewhere else to go, now, even though she had yet to find the proof she'd decided to wait for.

...hm. something that detects invisible things?

[prayerless]

Aqua looked to the neglected food again. "Then you're not controlling yourself," she said simply, with a note of somberness behind it. "If it's really because you're in Group D, then whoever is in charge of this is who is in control of you." It seemed like such an obvious follow-up, considering their previous thread of conversation, but Naminé needed to hear it. Even being aware that she was being controlled would restore some power to her.

Something in Aqua kept niggling at her about the possibility that Naminé was just trying to decrease her morale, but she ignored it thoroughly. Even if that far-fetched idea was the case, then by being optimistic, she could at least show that the plan wasn't working and she was nowhere close to breaking. "You don't have to make yourself feel differently," the acrobatic woman went on. "Just keep reminding yourself that it's not anything you're doing. All of it is the tower. The people in charge

Heat vision, I guess? Not that CR necessarily has a heat signature or whatever it's called.

[lethechained]

Naminé turned her eyes downward to regard the floor. Not controlling herself.... She readily admitted that that might be the case. And yet-- it seemed to make so much sense. What could possibly set them free? An outside force, perhaps, but it seemed so hard to believe that there was one that could do something in such a situation. Even if these thoughts were someone else's doing, they weren't necessarily wrong

...echolocation maybe?

[prayerless]

Maybe the advice wouldn't work for Naminé -- after all, just because Aqua had the self-awareness required for the actions suggested didn't mean Naminé did. Or, even if she did, that these actions would yield the right result. Not everyone thought the same way, and that was especially true now that they were part of this mysterious experiment.

Regardless, Aqua smiled a little at the younger girl. "You don't have to thank me if it didn't help," she assured. She didn't really even need thanks if it did help, either, but that wasn't the point. "But I think it's worth thinking about." Not saying much for her, personally (everything was apparently worth thinking about to her right now), but the sentiment was no less truthful just because of her paranoia

Could work, assuming it actually has a surface for stuff to bounce off of. :O

[lethechained]

Naminé recieved the smile with a shift in her own expression toward momentary surprise. Funny; this state of mind almost made her feel like she was back in Castle Oblivion, so such a kind gesture, even a small one, was rather startling and out of place. At first she thought she should smile back, but then that thought was ambushed by the thought that what did it matter, anyway? But then that thought was shoved aside because even though they might never get out of there, kindness was still worthwhile. It might help, a little, even if it wouldn't make a real difference. So, with an effort, she smiled back. "I meant it. It's very kind of you to try to help