Comments | szaleniec1000: Deserving Chapter 48

szaleniec1000

Deserving Chapter 48

Jan 30, 2011 00:00

Ladies and gentlemen, this is it. If you've been following the sporking so far, Chapter 48 needs no introduction. It's not even "just" the revelation about the Dursleys did to Harry, but Chapter 48 is just all of the worst of Deserving distilled into a single chapter. Think about that for a moment.

( Deserving Chapter 48 (NSFW, of course) )

show don't tell, close harmony conversation, exquisite burn, please form an orderly queue, paedofinder general, lamarcked ones, reading the books is a good idea, pov!fail, rectuuum!, mary sue and gary stu, allcaps of doom, celebrian wants her buttplug back, you fail paediatrics forever, dumbledorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrre!, single is a douche, convention of the psychics, dada, minerva is ooc, epic fail, waterloo road did it better, please recycle where facilities exist, how many tags does this chapter have, ivory seed, wrong word dammit, bad sex, the dursleys aren't paedophiles, badfic:deserving, anvil of foreshadowing, i hate that you have a cock, centaur of gor, doubt your commitment to sparkle motion, mione my arse, ministrations, incantations do not work that way, screw karma, harry potter, brain bleach, said bookism, singularity of fail, continuity isn't optional

Comments 22

enochiansigils January 30 2011, 05:09:30 UTC

... I'm going to hell.

I'll see you there, then!

eaglevision1999 January 30 2011, 05:13:14 UTC

So that was chapter 48. I'm surprised she didn't try to milk the Vernon!rape revelation for more drama.
Also, I haven't seen a Mary Sue as obvious as Serena fr a long time (probably because I close the tab in horror before it can get this bad).
You're right about terrible things in fiction. I think horrible events in fiction become horrible by showing the bad consequences and attached feelings in a somewhat realistic manner. Just stating them or glossing over them (or going over the top with them), will read more as a macabre comedy. Especially if every character is written as despicable as the Deserving cast.

szaleniec1000 January 30 2011, 17:09:55 UTC

I'm surprised she didn't try to milk the Vernon!rape revelation for more drama.

She did try, with a rambling wall of text that didn't even read like Harry's voice, but fell flat because the only real consequence seems to be that now Severus can't wear a collar (epic high drama!) because apparently collars remind Harry of dogs, which remind him of Marge. I guess it sucked to be Sirius in the Deservingverse. No sign of the trauma when Draco unveiled his own collar earlier in the chapter either.

Also, I haven't seen a Mary Sue as obvious as Serena fr a long time (probably because I close the tab in horror before it can get this bad).

I'm toying with the idea of submitting her to pottersues like I threatened to in an earlier chapter. :)

eaglevision1999 February 1 2011, 00:38:07 UTC

I guess it sucked to be Sirius in the Deservingverse. No sign of the trauma when Draco unveiled his own collar earlier in the chapter either.
I think the author just makes this up as he goes. Nothing makes sense in Deserving after all.

Does she qualify for Pottersues? I had the impression only Sues as main charas/that are there from the beginning are posted. Otherwise I'd say go ahead, she fits right in withsome of the worse Sues there. Maybe pottersues should consider a "Canon characters infant children Sue week" or something.

szaleniec1000 February 1 2011, 02:50:06 UTC

Maybe pottersues should consider a "Canon characters infant children Sue week" or something.

Maybe sending her Serena would inspire her to run one. There must be others with how common kidfics (mpreg and otherwise) are in this fandom. :)

tenkai_kujaku January 30 2011, 11:11:31 UTC

Ugh. Just plain ugh.
Although I'm surprised she didn't detail the Vernon-is-a-rapist-incestuous-pig bit more, I'm not asking to know more.

Also, I'll save a spot for you in Hell, near the chocolate fountain.

ms_shalimar January 30 2011, 12:09:30 UTC

Drive-by icon love!

ms_shalimar January 30 2011, 12:31:34 UTC

I have to admit, I'm not terribly surprised that the author didn't go into too much detail about Harry and Vernon - it seems to be at about the same level of detail she gives anything that doesn't pertain to the "Harry and Snape are soulmates and shag a lot" side of things.

Also, am I the only one who thinks Draco's pride (such that it remains) would prevent him from making such an idiot of himself in front of so many other people? And yes, I might very well be focusing on that so I can ignore the rest of the awful, including Serena-Sue up there. Even Gossip Girl's Serena is less Sueish.

tenkai_kujaku January 30 2011, 13:49:48 UTC

Yeah, Draco's suddenly turned from proud little Slytherin git to a hard-boiled romance heroine.
This makes me very sad.

ms_shalimar January 30 2011, 13:53:17 UTC

Exactly. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for notevil!Draco (as I don't buy into the Slytherin=evil as a definite pattern) but there's still no way he'd voluntarily humiliate himself in that way.

tenkai_kujaku January 30 2011, 14:10:04 UTC

Well, this *is* Deserving... That's the only way I can explain this.

Thread 7

meicdon13 January 31 2011, 14:15:21 UTC

WAIT. Vernon raped Harry? Is that what's happening? Did I get that right?

AUGH WHY.

szaleniec1000 February 1 2011, 02:46:11 UTC

Because the author needed to contrive some reason for Harry not to want Snape to wear a collar, because... search me. And the author, and damn if I know why, thought that was an appropriate reason to introduce a child sex abuse storyline.

meicdon13 February 1 2011, 08:15:48 UTC

Unless Vernon made Harry wear a collar, I don't see why Harry wouldn't want Snape to wear one *rubs chin thoughtfully* Then again, maybe I shouldn't try to apply logic to this 8|

szaleniec1000 February 1 2011, 10:36:28 UTC

The "logic", such that it is, runs: the kitchen floor incident happened at Marge's urging, Marge keeps dogs, therefore dog collars remind Harry of Marge and hence the KFI. Yet Harry doesn't seem to be unusually scared of dogs - he's fine with dog!Sirius once he knows he's friendly.