I went to my second therapy session on Wednesday last week; my first since resolving the insurance issues. This therapist is more likely to allow longer periods of silence while I think and/or organize my thoughts. That may be experience on their part, or a style thing. Either way, I feel a little anxious when neither of us are talking, but I think ( Read more... )

A donation to our Little Free Library included 50 Shades of Gray. That led to a brief conversation with one of the gay men at work about BDSM fantasy versus reality, leather, and International Mister Leather in Chicago. I love working here!

In a dream, I was in a room with seven or eight people watching a movie or similar. I was snuggled on a bed with a couple of male-type people and was relaxed and happy. Other people I knew were there and were happy for/with me. But everyone but one of the guys I was snuggling left. He touched me in an unpleasant way without consent, and then ( Read more... )

After doing pretty well most of the day, I had a mood crash this evening. Danae suggested we work on a puzzle together, and after spending a bit of time gathering up my motivation, I decided that was a good idea ( Read more... )

A friend shared a link to an article about how to maintain a queer identity while in a relationship that most people read as straight. (Link to the article) It's certainly something I've thought a lot about, so I was curious about what are, I assume, some widely-shared thoughts on the issue. A few pieces of it left me feeling disempowered (though ( Read more... )

That gap must have been the longest span that I haven't posted here in a very long time! Unfortunately, it reflects my state of mind and general capacity for action during that span quite well. Major depression and anxiety symptoms were a daily fight. We've been approaching this in therapy in a really interesting way and I want to write about that ( Read more... )

I've barely been at my computer this past week. Most of my time has been spent working on various projects in Danae's condo. Having solidly defined tasks that I can fully grasp and accomplish is a fundamental contrast to my experience in New York, and is making me deeply happy. I feel safe, and just as importantly, valuable and competent here ( Read more... )