FIC: She Dreams With an Open Heart (Arthur/Gwen, PG) Prologue

Aug 01, 2010 13:20

Rating: PG

Disclaimer: Merlin belongs to the Beeb. Certain aspects of this from Doctor Who Series Five, and the cut text is from the episode “The Beast Below.”

Summary:  Nothing is ever forgotten, not completely. When a tragedy occurs, Gwen finds herself in a new kingdom, with no recollection of her life in Camelot. The presence of a mysterious person is triggering her memory, but meanwhile, an injured man turns up, whom she seems to have a great affinity for. By why is she here, who is the strange person she keeps on seeing and why can't she remember a thing?

Based on the remainder of my Spring Fling prompts: .F-26. "By not waiting you gave up on us, and you know that's the truth." By genstarwen92 , F-32. “You don’t need to win anyone’s heart. You just need to ask for it” (House) by hmsharmony ,  F-88. Arthur's gravely injured on the battlefield, and has to keep telling himself that he can't die, he has to make it home, bysgmajorshipper .

A/N: The prologue takes place a year after 2x13 and under the assumption that both Arthur and Gwen know about Merlin’s powers. I’m really sorry for the delay in this, I was stuck on it for a while. Many thanks to _autumncolours  for being my alphabetamegatron of awesomesauce.

This will be posted in three or four installments.

Prologue/ Part One/ Part Two/ Part Three / Part Four / Part Five/ Part Six/ Part Seven



***

Prologue

I.

“Fix it, please!”

Her body is growing colder in his arms. He clutches her close in order to keep her hanging on that bit longer.

“FIX IT!” he yells at the brown-haired boy.

The boy shakes his head, uncertain that he can, but he approaches him anyway.

“Merlin, you have to bring her back. Please.” Arthur looks at him with utter despair in his eyes.

The warlock kneels down beside them. The girl is hanging by a thread and there’s blood-so much blood everywhere. He closes his eyes. Her life is ebbing away.

In the distance, a raven-haired woman watches on in horror. When Merlin opens his eyes and looks up, he sees the woman gone, devastated by the destruction she has caused.

But he doesn’t have time to think about her.

The two of them lay her out on the hard, cold ground and both claim a hand. Merlin begins the incantations, one utterance after another. He’s performed a lot of magic in his short lifetime, but none that has mattered as much as this. This is his friend lying lifelessly on the floor. The first one out of all of them to find out about his secret and the one who always showed just how great she cared. His affection for her makes it hard for him to concentrate, but he attempts to because she matters far too much to give up trying.

Each incantation spoken is a not-so-silent plea for her to open her eyes and wake up. But she doesn’t. He persists, however, in hope that his magic is enough to reach her heart and bring it fully back to life.

After what seems like hours, Merlin stops the spells, absolutely exhausted. The girl remains unmoving on the ground.

“What happens now?” Arthur demands.

“We wait,” comes his restrained reply.

***

“Merlin?”

Arthur’s voice is hoarse and vulnerable.

The sky has darkened and Merlin can hardly see the other man’s face.

“Yes?” His voice isn’t too stable either.

“Do you know what I’ve realised?”

“What?”

“Love... it isn’t too dissimilar from magic.”

Merlin watches as Arthur stares down at the girl, but he doesn’t understand what he means.

II.

The three of them ride to Souhaiter, a nearby kingdom. Gwen has a relative there that she would like to visit for a while and Arthur and Merlin accompany her for the journey, on the guise that the prince has official business there to seek.

The journey is a long one and Gwen is oblivious to the fraught nerves of the two men. They both allow her to chatter as they stare ahead, unable to concentrate on a word she is saying. When they reach the kingdom, all three dismount their horses. Gwen walks on ahead in excitement with her horse in tow, whereas the two of them hang back.

Merlin lets out a sigh and turns to Arthur, who is staring at Gwen intently. “Are you sure about this, Arthur?” he asks.

“Positive.” Arthur’s voice is terse.

The warlock looks on at Gwen, who has slowed down in expectation and has begun stroking the head of her horse.

“She’ll never forgive you if she finds out,” he says.

Arthur inhales sharply. “I’ll never forgive myself if something happens to her again. Rather this than...that.”

Merlin nods in affirmation, but his lips form a tight line. Slowly, he makes his way toward Gwen, while Arthur watches on.

***

Gwen turns her head to see if the other two are following her, only to see Merlin approaching her with a sombre expression on his face.

“Why so serious, Merlin?” she teases. “I’m only staying here a while, not forever.”

Merlin doesn’t smile. Instead, he comes to stand right up close to her.

“You were the first friend I made in Camelot,” he states.

Gwen looks at him as if he’s gone mad but before she has a chance to react, Merlin places his arms around her and draws her close to him. Confused, her arms go around him in consolation. She feels something on her neck that feels akin to dampness, but when she pulls back, his eyes don’t betray a thing.

She frowns.

He draws his hand up to pull back a strand of loose hair and his hand lingers there, his fingertips tapping gently against her temple. She hears him whisper something that she can’t quite fathom and then she finds her eyes beginning to flutter.

He draws his hand away.

“You’ll be safe here,” he tells her, placing a soft kiss against her forehead.

Brown eyes meet blue, but that sense of familiarity is fading.

She’s already starting to forget.

***

Her back is to him when he begins to approach her. Merlin is nearby, his hand hovering over hers. Arthur knows he doesn’t want to leave her here.

She turns to him, just as he stands bare centimetres from her and Merlin steps away.  She blinks several times, her eyes desperately trying to focus on him. He sees unfamiliarity in her eyes, but a waning sense of recognition too. As the centre of her world he’s the last thing she’ll forget; everything else around him has already faded.

“Arthur, what’s happening to me?” Her voice is scared and slightly panicked. She doesn’t understand what is happening and he’s the last person who can explain it to her.

“Guinevere...” He doesn’t know the right words to soothe her, so he places his hand on her face. He smiles, even though on the inside he feels like he’s dying. “You’re fine. Everything...will be fine. This place...is different, but you’re going to love it here, I promise.”

“Okay.” Her voice retains a level of uncertainty, but her eyes are full of trust and that breaks his heart even more.

“I can’t stay here,” he tells her. “But I will be back one day, I hope.”

She frowns. “So this is goodbye?”

“For now.”

She bites her lip, looking incredibly forlorn at this prospect.

“I...,” he begins, and then realises he doesn’t quite know what to say. His hand comfortingly strokes her cheek, and then slowly he lifts her chin upwards.

“I’ll miss you,” he tells her, before his lips meet hers in a firm kiss. She kisses him with the same recognition and affection she always does, though his attempt is more urgent and desperate. His hands grapple her face, pressing against her cheeks and her temples and then moving down her body, touching her shoulders, her arms, then down again and settling tightly on her waist. Every part of her he commits to memory and he knows that just as he’s remembering, she’s already forgetting.

Somehow, he manages to break the kiss. Her eyes are closed and he leans his forehead against hers, wishing he could stay here with her, but knowing fully that he can’t.  His eyes are full, but he knows that he can’t cry. Not now and not yet.

Merlin reappears by her side and Arthur lets her go. Gwen looks dazed as Merlin leads her away. With each step she moves away, a fragment of him erases from her memory. Arthur can almost measure how far she’ll walk before she completely forgets who he is.

Certain that she won’t look back at him, the tears begin to fall. He’s sensed it of course, but it’s not until now that he realises just how much he’s losing in watching her go. He is losing her companionship, her friendship, her love and his sense of purpose.  And she’s taking away his heart.

He wishes there was another way, but he can’t think of any. Inside he feels cowardly, like he’s cheating her somehow.

By letting her go, you’re giving up on her, he thinks and despite his internal protestations, he knows that this is true.

***

Part One

genre: futurefic, fic, morgana/merlin, genre:au, arthur/gwen, fanfic: merlin, series: she dreams, ot4

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