and the only reason is him.
The only reason to live.

When someone means that much...
well fuck...
I think that...
It's love.

Oh Josh.
I'm so sorry for scaring you today
and being an ass.
Please say you'll forgive me.

I'm just so lonely.
And I miss you so much.
I need to hear your voice again,
and to not fight.

And just be in love.
So I can kiss you like I've ( Read more... )

On the twelfth day of Christmas, ( Read more... )

used
used
used

no wonder he told me that he felt like
"Josh won"

besides I'd been wondering where that came from,
stupid Jill
as if he'd never find this livejournal.

People are too smart for that nonsense.

Especially since I commented on my own journal
in Homilophobic.

what kind of fool have I been.
what kind of fool am I being.
what kind of fool will I be?

UGH.

( Read more... )

Josh and I are.........................

back together????

oh dear.

I dunno.

It could be good.
I hope it's good.
I'm wishing it's good.

thank god for friends.

Yesterday,
when Josh's name on MSN
was
"searching for my ikigai"

I realized.

I bet that's a line he uses with all the girls
kind of like
"did it hurt when you fell from heaven"
or
"is that a mirror in your pocket cause I can totally see myself in your pants"

and shit like that.

I thought it was real?

Maybe,
but all signs are pointing to
confusion
right now.

god.
he knows how he hurts me.
and he fucking loves it.

What kind of boyfriend was he ever?!

GOD DAMN.

I just want to die now.
I think he's jealous of Chris?
WHY?!

JESUSUSSUSUS.

this is after all,
my emo Journal.

So why wouldn't I write about my break up with Josh in it.

I think,
all along
he was looking
for the perfect reason
to dump me on my ass.

Maybe he was sick of me,
my fits,
my constant need for love,
attention,
maybe he was sick
of having a girlfriend
who needed caring for.

Kind of like a pet,
though bigger,
and with a better mind.

( Read more... )

How to make a rosen_blood
Ingredients:

3 parts jealousy

5 parts courage

1 part
Method:
Combine in a tall glass half filled with crushed ice. Add a little curiosity if desired!

Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.com

gawd, so I haven't updated in this for... ever ( Read more... )