(no subject)
this is after all,
my emo Journal.
So why wouldn't I write about my break up with Josh in it.
I think,
all along
he was looking
for the perfect reason
to dump me on my ass.
Maybe he was sick of me,
my fits,
my constant need for love,
attention,
maybe he was sick
of having a girlfriend
who needed caring for.
Kind of like a pet,
though bigger,
and with a better mind.
I always gave unconditional love,
and when I expected it back
I got shot down,
dragged along,
stabbed
and thrown away.
A carcass thrown out for the wolves
to be stared down upon
proudly
while the flesh is ripped, torn, shredded, devoured.
I want to be angry,
I want to be seething
and full of rage
and seeing red
in his general direction,
but my horrible mind
and my tratorious heart
are both still in love with him.
Anger
and hate
would be easier
than the frustration of
still being in love with him.
God damn me.
Jill XOXO