the law of threes

[recycling]

a retraction
I would like to prostrate at the foot of Ms. I'm-So-Smart-Yet-I-Don't-Know-What-A-Gerbil-Is in sincerest apology for calling her Ms. I'm-So-Smart-Yet-I-Don't-Know-What-A-Gerbil-Is. That totally blows ass of me. Not only am I sorry for calling her out like that, I'm also sorry that she doesn't know what a gerbil is. Here, my friend.

Comments

[faster_pussycat]

i think you've been a good friend. maybe not "behind my back," who knows about any of that. you're okay. but bye. always so nice to read your posts.

[recycling]

It's always so nice to read your comments and your posts, they're quite nearly my raison d'etre for being here sometimes.

By the way, your sunglasses own. Let's be friends and stop the violence and start spreading happiness.

[faster_pussycat]

i've got a taste for blood tonight, jay, i just watched a movie in which blood was squeezed out of yanked-out intestines.

plus, i'm high.

dammit.

[recycling]

Yeah, Kevin 'Stang!

What movie was this, where you saw all that nonsense? Were you watching House of 1000 Corpses again? It's unhealthy, my friend. I just want to help you.

But now I need to go to sleep and give my overheated brain a rest.

[ex_juandave]

Damn it.

I think I've even spelled "segue" as "segway" in my journal.

it's because we ain't french

[recycling]

But at least you know what those switches in the bathrooms are for, right? :(

Re: it's because we ain't french

[faster_pussycat]

actually, i'll be perfectly honest...i don't think i know what switches you're talking about...what switches? and i've talked about my embarrassing phonetic pronounceations. and i'm not sure if "segue" ever occured to me, because it's not as if it's ever come up in my writing before. :)

Re: it's because we ain't french

[recycling]

Well, you know in different bathrooms, you have the light switch, and then right next to the light switch there's another switch, and when you turn it on it makes this noise that sounds like a fan. Apparently, it is a fan, to mask the noise of you pooping and the smell of you pooping.

I just never lived in a house that has one, I still haven't.

[saladbar]

Gerbils are illegal to own in some states, like California. So it is conceivable to be smart and not know what one is.

[recycling]

Yeah, but we're from a Gerbil state. I see your point of view, but in this state, gerbils are allowed to roam as they see fit, much like cows in India. Hurting one is punishable by all sorts of nasty things. We have a golden statue of a gerbil in front of our capital building. It says "OUR FOUNDER."

But yeah, I'm still a stinkpickle for making fun of my friend. And that part I'm not lying about. :(

[saladbar]

I guess then Richard Gere isn't welcome in your state. ;)

[recycling]

What's the deal with Richard Gere? You're like the second person who has mentioned that dude. Did he make a statement about how much he hates gerbils or something?

If so..no, he is not welcome in this state.

[nikki42]

I and my fat computer chair shaped ass thank you, and wish you much luck in both your preparations and journey.

[recycling]

Thank you, dear. I just got carried away about the big bottom part of things. :(

[kenopolis]

"I may be a shitty friend, but at least I don't make cute little animals cry because they're going to be killed for your fat computer chair-shaped ass."

I had no choice Jay, you know that. I know you arn't talking about me, because I don't have a fat ass... But it still stung a little.

And Jay, always remember, it takes 2 to tango... You have always been a good friend to me, and I often feel like I've been neglecting my duties in the friend dept... But the fact remains, whatever you need, whenever...

BTW, you need anything in preperation for your move? I've got Thursday and Friday off if you want to take me up on a meal at Blue Bird.

[kenopolis]

Oh, and I've got Jason's boxes and tape guns... they helped me, and they can help you!

Or does Jason want them back? Hmmm...

What he said...

[jasonanonymous]

Yeah. What he said.

...and I like "Sweet Cheeks" or "Tootie-Tang" better than "Buttnugget", by the way.

Maybe you could combine them, something like "Sweet Cheeks Buttnugget". I don't know...

But anyway, if you can use those boxes/tape/tape guns, go ahead and snag 'em from Ken. Donate/recycle the boxes and send the tape guns back (or leave 'em here in town and I'll come get 'em.

~Jason

Re: What he said...

[recycling]

How about "Sweetnugget"?

That one sounds all sorts of awesome. :)