FIC- Lies for Love Part Eleven
Title: Lies for love
Pairing: Thirteen/Cameron, Thirteen/Cuddy
Rating: NC-17
Spoilers: Pretty much zilch. This is set at the beginning of Season 5 when House has his new team but contains nothing a8bout them specific to episodes.
Disclaimer: I own... nada.
Summary: Thirteen can't remain faithful and risks losing everything that matters to her.
( Part One.) ( Part Two) ( Part Three) (Part Four) (Part Five) (Part Six) (Part Seven) (Part Eight) (Part Nine) (Part Ten)
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11.
“Well well well,” House entered his office. “Wasn’t that interesting? You know, I think I’m going to make this whole early slash being on time thing permanent. There are so many interesting things that happen!”
Thirteen was so upset that she couldn’t even muster up the energy to retaliate. She just gazed up at House, waiting to see what he would say next.
“So let me get this straight,” he quirked up his mouth. “Probably not the best choice of words considering the subject matter, but hey; it’ll do.” He perched on the desk next to Thirteen, wincing slightly as he pulled his leg up. “You’re with Cuddy, but you’ve been a greedy girl and are also with Cameron; something that Cuddy wasn’t aware of until now.”
“No,” Thirteen said softly. He’d gotten it wrong. She knew there was no point in denying it; lying had achieved nothing for her so far. However, she was going to make sure that when he gossiped to Wilson he was in possession of the right facts. “I’m in a relationship with Cuddy, and she thinks...” Thirteen paused. Oh what the hell; he knew anyway. “knows I’m sleeping... have slept with Cameron.”
House surveyed her for a few seconds. “But you’re not admitting it.”
“No,” Thirteen replied.
“Cuddy’s not stupid; you’ll never convince her,” House scoffed.
“I’m going to lose her,” Thirteen stated. She didn’t care that this was House she was revealing her thoughts to, she didn’t care that she was discussing this in work, she didn’t care about anything.
“You’ve lost her anyway,” House shrugged. “You betrayed her, and I don’t see Cuddy forgetting that.”
“What shall I do?” Thirteen asked, willing to listen to any advice at all even if it was from House. He was usually right about patients... maybe he could say something to her that was helpful.
“How am I supposed to know?” He snapped, pulling himself back off the desk. “You want my opinion; you’re a total dumbass. You had the hottest woman in the entire hospital and you had to go and cheat on her with another woman, who’s already in a relationship with a man!”
Thirteen was angry at his words. She rose to her feet. “You think I don’t know that? Yeah, I’ve fucked up. Tell me how to fix it!” She yelled, though she immediately regretted her words. House was going to tell her to get lost, to sort out her own problems. Why should he care about her relationship with Cuddy?
House watched her, the look that told Thirteen the cogs were turning in his head. “How do you feel?” He asked, no emotion in his voice.
“What?” Thirteen was confused.
“It’s a simple enough question,” he barked.
Not really sure what he meant but going with what she thought he did, Thirteen stuttered, “Well I... Cameron...” She started again. “What happened with Cameron... it was just one big mistake.”
“So it only happened once?” House assumed.
“No,” Thirteen said, ashamed. “But it was just sex. I ended it because I realised Cuddy was who I wanted and that what I was doing was wrong. But Cuddy found us arguing, and somehow she knows...”
“If she knows, why don’t you admit it? She’s just going to end it anyway,” House pointed out.
“Yeah,” Thirteen didn’t know what else to say. “She wasn’t supposed to find out,” she added desperately.
“Look; this isn’t my problem. You can sort this out in your own time,” he hobbled to his now empty chair and sat down, twirling his cane in the air.
Recognising the dismissal, Thirteen turned to go into the adjoining diagnostic’s room. Before she left, hand on the door handle, she said simply, “Thank you. For the advice.”
House glared at her and said sharply, “I don’t give a damn about you, but Cuddy...” he searched for the right words. “If you make Cuddy miserable then she’s going to make me miserable. It’s purely in the interest of self-preservation, I assure you.”
Thirteen nodded. He was lying, she recognised that. A liar acknowledged a fellow liar. He was telling the truth when he said that he didn’t care about her, but he definitely cared about Cuddy. She was one of the only constant presences within his life and he didn’t want to see her unhappy. If he made her sad then it was ok, but when someone else interfered it affected him on a personal level, even if he did say otherwise. That was why he’d given her his opinion in a positively nice manner. Normally he would have been far harsher and meaner, but instead he’d toned it down. Thirteen was going to take his advice and admit it, but she’d definitely pay a visit to the ER to tell Cameron first.
After all, she owed her that much.
**
Close to the end of Thirteen’s shift, House wandered off to cause havoc elsewhere in the hospital. Thirteen took this opportunity to hurry to the ER. She prayed that Cuddy wouldn’t find her down there; that was the last thing she needed, but it was a risk she would have to take. Cameron had to be spoken to; it wasn’t fair not to let her know what was going on. She was a big part of this too, and though Thirteen was sure that Cuddy wouldn’t actually do anything to Cameron in anger, she should still be forewarned. In addition to this, she had to tell Cameron that she’d come clean to House, so that she was prepared for his mocking behaviour. He might have cared about Cuddy, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t use the opportunity to wind Cameron up.
As soon as Cameron spotted Thirteen, she made a move to approach her. “I need to talk to you,” she said quickly. “I was just about to come and find you actually.”
“What?” Thirteen was confused. “You need to talk to me?”
“Yes; c’mon,” Cameron grabbed her arm, pulled her into a cubicle and slid the curtain shut around them. “Cuddy has been looking for me, one of my nursing staff just informed me. Something tells me her reason for wanting to talk to me isn’t entirely innocent.”
Thirteen sighed. “She knows. Cameron; she figured it out after she saw us arguing. I’ve been denying it but she won’t listen.”
“So what are you going to do?” Cameron asked worriedly.
“Tell her,” Thirteen declared. “I have no other choice.”
“You can’t!” Cameron hissed. “What if she tells Chase?”
“Not my problem. And what does it matter anyway; you don’t love him!” Thirteen snapped.
Cameron glared at her. “That isn’t the point and you know it,” she sighed. “When are you going to tell her?”
“Today,” Thirteen said, swallowing hard. “As soon as possible.” There was no point in prolonging the inevitable, she needed to be strong and face her mistake whilst she possessed the courage.
“Is there nothing I can say to make you change your mind?” Cameron asked, tears in her eyes.
Thirteen didn’t care; Cameron wasn’t her concern. She’d done the right thing by letting her know what she was about to do, but that was as far as it was going to go. Even when Cuddy did end their relationship, she wouldn’t be turning to Cameron for comfort. Going to Cameron was what had caused this whole fucking mess in the first place. And so wearily, Thirteen shook her head. “No. I have to be honest; I’ve been lying for far too long,” She backed away from Cameron. “You should tell Chase because even if Lisa doesn’t; House will.”
“House?” Cameron frowned, sitting on the trolley.
“He overheard me talking to Lisa and worked it out,” Thirteen left out the part about her asking him for advice. Cameron didn’t need to know that.
“Oh God,” Cameron moaned, closing her eyes in absolute horror. “That’s it. We’re finished.”
“Maybe not, if you tell him first,” Thirteen said softly. “He loves you, you’ve told me as much yourself. Be honest with him and he might appreciate that. But honestly Cameron? If you don’t love him then you shouldn’t string him along. Think of how I’ve made you feel. That’s exactly what it’s going to be like for Chase.” With one last apologetic look, she left Cameron sitting down, coming to terms with the news.
For Thirteen; that wasn’t too hard. It was unpleasant definitely, but if she had a choice between doing that a hundred times and telling Cuddy the truth just once; she’d pick the former to carry out every time. She knew that she did this, there was some truth to the saying, “What goes around comes around” but that didn’t mean that she wasn’t going to feel a little sorry for herself. It wasn’t like anyone else would give a damn how she was feeling; so she was entitled to a little self-sympathy.
Before she knew it she was outside Cuddy’s office, looking in at the only woman she had ever loved.
She knocked on the door.
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