Swear t'god this place is bigger than Texas. More Dracular like than Texas. Nevah thought Ah'd be enjoyin' hangin' round with ah metally manh, but that Skwishgar is alright. Bets gettin' face's full O'sexwually warrior body spray. Ah made mah self comfortable in un O'those party likker closets.  Think ah scared t'crap outta their cook - tried t' ( Read more... )

MAH WEIGHT IN GLUG 
IS NOT SUEFISHANT
DAN HALEN!

imma kill yew. sonsabitch.

Ah've been done chalkified! Aint seen hide nor hair of that dayum cat-womern who dun it to meh either.

Guess it ain't so bad, tho Rusty is posafied t'devils gotten intah meh. Ah told him wurnt the devil -- t'was sciencefied party likker!

Dayum lawdog had me locked up fer drivin' on t'dayum sidewalk again. Ah told em -- if yew dun want meh drivin' on t'dayum cotton-picken sidewalk then they wut ought to make them sonsabitchin' sidewalks further from t'dayum road ( Read more... )

Ah have devised that jus' cause some fellahs got tentacles jus' like one of mah own blood it does not make that he to be ah proper squiddin ( Read more... )

Incase ya'll aint listenfied your eardrums my clan 'n' ah have offichellay been declared ah endanjared species!

The Appalachian Mud Squid!

For some reason this hear title came with ah fancy dingerbobber earring. Ah just wanted to get it all to yah boys out thar, just because ah am ah fertile strong robust male of unmentionable charmability squid ( Read more... )

Damn house 'spoded again. I told that womern sister O'mine tah build 'er damn meth labs else where. Looks like we'all gonna be holdin' up in t'shed again.

Nobody touches them tires. Those are mine!

So's this here computin' sex box. You touch it and it is on!