I COULDN'T FIGURE OUT ANY COOL STORIES TO TELL ABOUT STUFF THAT HAD ALREADY HAPPENED TO ME THIS WEEK, SO I FIGURED THE BEST THING TO DO WOULD BE TO GO BACK IN TIME AND INTERVIEW MR. CHEKHOV AND TALK TO HIM ABOUT GUNS ( Read more... )

THIS WEEK THE TOPIC IS ABOUT CONFESSIONS AND SO I THINK IT WOULD BE A GOOD TIME FOR ME TO CONFESS SOME THINGS TO YOU.

YOU MIGHT THINK I AM A FUN LOVING TIME TRAVELING T-REX WIZARD, AND CERTAINLY THAT IS TRUE. BUT THERE HAVE BEEN SOME ROUGH TIMES IN MY PAST. IT HASN'T ALWAYS BEEN SOAPS AND FAIRY UNICORNS.

THE NOT-SO-SQUEAKY-CLEAN ADVENTURES OF ( Read more... )

I AM VERY GLAD THAT WE HAVE AN OPEN TOPIC BECAUSE THAT MEANS I CAN WRITE ABOUT ANYTHING I WANT. I HAD LOTS OF IDEAS AT FIRST BUT I THINK WHAT I MOST WANT TO TELL YOU ABOUT IS MY NEW HOBBY.

THE SQUEAKY-CLEAN ADVENTURES OF OCTAVIAN THE T-REX

CHAPTER ELEVEN

MY FAVORITE HOBBYWHEN YOU ARE A VERY LARGE TIME-TRAVELING T-REX, IT'S HARD TO FIND HOBBIES ( Read more... )

I HAVE A STORY FOR YOU ABOUT THE TIME SISSYFACEBELLE THOUGHT SHE WANTED TO ADOPT A PET MONKEY.

THE MONKEY-CENTRIC ADVENTURES OF OCTAVIAN THE T-REX

CHAPTER TEN

THE TIME SISSYFACEBELLE THOUGHT SHE WANTED TO ADOPT A PET MONKEYSO I SHOULD START BY TELLING YOU THAT SISSYFACEBELLE GREW UP IN A HOME WHERE PETS WEREN'T ALLOWED, HER MOM WAS ALLERGIC TO ( Read more... )

WHEN YOU ARE A TIME TRAVELER, HUMAN IDEAS LIKE "PAST", "PRESENT" AND "FUTURE" DON'T EXIST THE WAY THEY DO FOR MOST OTHER BEINGS. INSTEAD, YOU HAVE TO PAY SUPER CLOSE ATTENTION TO WHEN YOU ARE, SO THAT YOU CAN KEEP UP WITH ALL OF THE POP CULTURE REFERENCES OF THE TIME, OR ELSE RISK GETTING LABELLED A "SQUARE", A "NOOB", OR A "TOASTER" (THEY CALL ( Read more... )

SO I WAS TIME TRAVELING AND DID NOT SEE THAT I HAD BEEN ELIMINATED UNTIL YESTERDAY, AND THEN I WAS VERY SAD. SISSYFACEBELLE BOUGHT ME SOME ICE CREAM FROM ITALY IN THE PAST, WHICH WAS VERY NICE OF HER BECAUSE ITALY FROM THE PAST MAKES THE BEST ICE CREAM. BUT THEN I FOUND OUT I COULD HAVE A SECOND CHANCE SO I ASKED FOR IT AND WAS VERY LUCKY TO ( Read more... )

I THOUGHT THAT TODAY WOULD BE A GOOD TIME TO TELL YOU ABOUT SOME MEMES FROM THE FUTURE SO THAT YOU WILL HAVE A HEAD START.

SINCE I AM A TIME-TRAVELING T-REX, I HAVE BEEN TO THE FUTURE AND I'VE SEEN PLENTY OF FUTURE MEMES. I CAN TELL YOU THAT THEY DON'T GET ANY BETTER. SO YOU HAVE THAT TO LOOK FORWARD TO.

THE LESS ADVENTURE-Y AND MORE MEME- ( Read more... )

SOME PEOPLE LAST WEEK TOLD ME THAT I SHOULD WRITE A TIME TRAVEL GUIDE. THE TRUTH IS THAT IT'S PRETTY DIFFICULT TO TIME TRAVEL UNLESS YOU YOU HAVE TIME TRAVEL JEANS.

OH WAIT.

SISSYFACEBELLE IS TELLING ME IT'S TIME TRAVEL GENESMY MOTHER WAS A TIME TRAVELER AND SO WAS MY GREAT GRANDFATHER, THEY ALL SORT OF JUST KNEW HOW TO TIME TRAVEL. IT'S A ( Read more... )

AS A TIME-TRAVELING T-REX, I HAVE VISTED SCOTLAND ONE OR TWO TIMES. AND BY ONE OR TWO TIMES, I MEAN BUTT-TONS OF TIMES, YOU GUYS.

SO IT GOES WITHOUT SAYING THAT I KNOW A LOT OF SCOTSMEN. I AM GOING TO TELL YOU SOME FACTS ABOUT SCOTSMEN THAT I HAVE LEARNED OVER MY MANY YEARS OF VISITING SCOTLAND.

THE ASTOUNDING AND OVERWHELMING ADVENTURES OF ( Read more... )

I HAVE NEVER BUILT A MOUSETRAP MYSELF, BUT I THINK NOW IS AS GOOD A TIME AS ANY TO TELL YOU ABOUT SOME OF MY AWESOME WIZARD POWERS.

I AM GOING TO TELL YOU HOW I WOULD USE MY AMAZING WIZARD POWERS TO BUILD THE MOST PERFECT MOUSE TRAP THAT EVER EXISTED. MAYBE I WILL MAKE SOME PROTOTYPES AND YOU CAN BUY THEM.

THE IMPRESSIVE AND EVEN MORE ( Read more... )