Belonging: Chapter Twenty Five
Author's Note: I am SO sorry for the terrible delay in posting this chapter, but I'm blaming it on the Christmas holidays, and being ill for the last few weeks.
Please continue to leave your delicious comments :-)
Title: Belonging - Chapter Twenty Five
Fandom: Doctor Who/Torchwood
Characters/pairings: Jack/Ianto, Jack/Ten, Ianto/Ten, Jack/Ianto/Ten (phew!)
Rating: This Chapter - PG-13 for adult situations (Series is rated NC-17 overall)
Spoilers: The Stolen Earth, Journey's End
Disclaimer: The BBC own it all, the little tinkers
Warnings: m/m slash | polyamory | threesome | angst
Description:
Set immediately after the events of The Stolen Earth/Journey's End.
The Torchwood team members are struggling to get back to normal after recent shattering events, when the Doctor turns up in the Torchwood Hub in the middle of the night; alone, heartbroken, guilt-ridden, and needing somewhere to belong.
"I'm scared of wanting him. The way I want you. Is it wrong?"
Chapter Twenty Five
I slowly ran my tongue down his back, starting from the nape of the neck and ending at the cleft of his buttocks. He snorted with laughter and wriggled beneath me during the entire journey. Then I started at the bottom of his spine and ran my tongue all the way back up. By the time I had reached his shoulders, the tip of my nose was wet with my own saliva. He squirmed again, and I chuckled.
"How come when you're horny that turns you on, but when you're not horny, it tickles?" I asked. He shrugged.
After a moment, he twisted his neck and looked round at me. "I didn't say you could stop," he said, with a mock sulky expression. "Anyway, after a few more goes, I'll get horny again."
I spooned up behind him, wrapped my arms around his body and kissed his neck. "It's a good thing I have so much stamina, Mr Jones, because sometimes, you're insatiable."
Not that I was complaining, you understand.
We were still covered in a thin sheen of sweat from our lovemaking; we were warm and drowsy, and pleasantly sticky. One of my very favourite states to be in.
"Jack..." Ianto murmured.
I made a hmm sound as I started nibbling at his shoulder. Sometimes I just couldn't get enough of him.
"When you... when you're with the Doctor..." he sighed. "I read what you'd put in your journal. And it sounds... unbelievable. The sex, I mean."
I paused for a second, but then continued my nibbling. "Well, you're bonded with him now. Haven't you...?"
He didn't reply, so I took that as a no. It had only been a few days, I suppose. But Ianto didn't have the same negative effect on the Doctor's physiology that I had had at first, so I couldn't really see what was stopping them.
"No, I mean... is it better? Than when you're with me, I mean. It sounds like it must be better." He sounded a little flat. Insecure.
I raised myself up and leant on my elbow, and bodily pulled him over so that he was lying on his back and had no choice but to look at me.
"That's why I didn't want you reading my journal," I said softly. "I knew you'd think that. Or feel jealous, or something."
Ianto shrugged. "Yeah, well. I'm still keeping it for a couple of days. I want to add something to it. And eventually I'd have broken into your drawer and read it while you were out, anyway."
I gasped loudly and put my hand over my open mouth in mock outrage. Ianto flashed me a small grin.
"Okay," I said, at last. "Answer me this. Which is better; coffee or James Bond movies?"
He frowned. "What sort of a question is that?"
"Well, you love them both."
"Yeah... but... they're two different things. It's not like a choice between... coffee or beer."
"Exactly."
"But... sex is sex." He unconsciously started to suck on his index finger. I couldn't take my eyes off his mouth.
"Wrong."
"Maybe I wouldn't know. I've only ever... well, I've not been with as many people as you have. And when it relates to you, I use the term 'people' loosely, of course..." his voice sounded muffled around his finger. I decided he was probably nibbling at a ragged fingernail. Whatever he was doing, it was turning me on.
I trailed my own index finger down his chest. "Sex with the Doctor isn't better than sex with you. Of course not. It's just... different."
"But that... energy you share. The way you both feel the same sensations. The way you... become one person."
I shrugged. "When you and me get busy, we share something too. It's not Time Lord hocus pocus, but it's still fantastic. You know my body as well as your own. Better. Like I know every inch of yours. Every nerve ending, every pulse... every pressure point... I know exactly where they all are, and what ou like me to to do to them. If that's not us sharing something special, then I don't know what is."
He nodded uncertainly, but looked a little appeased. There was a pause.
"'Get busy'?" He repeated scornfully. I shrugged, smiling faintly.
He took a breath and took his finger out of his mouth. "Still. I wish you and me could have something like that. Do you think... hmm. Suppose not."
"I don't think he could give us that power, if that's what you mean. I don't think our brains are equipped for it," I mused. I was seeing the Doctor tonight. I planned to ask him about it. If that's what Ianto wanted, there was no harm in asking.
There was a short, comfortable silence.
"Anyway. Prove it." Ianto said eventually, with a trace of a smirk.
"Prove what?"
"Find one of my erogenous zones and turn me on, then."
"What... just like... that? What am I, some sort of machine? My only function is to pleasure you? You command, and I just obey? When did we decide that?" I kept my face deadpan.
"I decided. Just now. Get to it, bitch."
We both giggled. I was already semi-aroused, just from watching Ianto innocently sucking at his own finger. Ridiculous.
I cleared my throat theatrically. I reached out and grasped his chin between thumb and forefinger in a stiff, formal motion, and turned his head to the side, away from me. Then I leaned over, paused to blow a slow, warm breath directly into his ear, noting how he shivered, and then softly and slowly ran my tongue along the outline of his ear, sucked his earlobe into my mouth, sucked it languorously three times, released it, used my finger to push his earlobe forwards and then stuck my tongue into the hollow behind it, licking softly for a few seconds.
Then I stopped, looked down at his naked body, and noted that things were already looking up.
"Ha," I said smugly, and settled back onto my pillow.
A short moment later, Ianto launched himself at me so hard we both rolled over and fell out of my tiny bed, and onto the floor.
I really should do something about that.
***
The following evening, I was in bed again, albeit a much bigger and more comfortable one, with the Doctor. We were in a similar comfortably drowsy, slightly sticky state. The Doctor and I seemed to spend most of our time in bed, these days. Some nights I could hardly bear to let him go.
Being in the mood for scientific experimentation, I was trying the same spine-licking trick on the Doctor, to see if it tickled or turned him on. A bit of both, I think. He giggled and moaned in fairly equal measures.
He tastes different to Ianto.
Ianto tastes of sweet soap, with a suggestion of coffee grounds and the very slightest tang of Flash Lemon kitchen cleaner. Mixed together, it's really rather pleasant.
The Doctor tastes of some exotic spice that isn't native to Earth, with a hint of woodland glade and the merest suggestion of banana, but that's probably only because he eats so many of the blessed things.
But I digress.
Having already made the journey down, I licked slowly up the Doctor's slightly prominent spine, taking a left turn on the way and pressing my lips and tongue against that sensitive nerve ending he has, 4.7 centimetres above his hip bone. He rewarded my efforts by bucking his hips, and reaching down and grabbing a handful of my hair.
"Jack, I am almost a thousand years old, have a heart. You're trying to wear me out so that I can't travel anymore, aren't you?" He said in a mock suspicious tone.
I grinned and rested the side of my head against his hip, once I'd shuffled around and found a spot that wasn't too bony.
"You've no room to complain. I'm twice your age," I said blithely. And I've got two voracious men on the go."
Not for much longer though.
There was a pause. Maybe we were both thinking the same thing.
"How's the TARDIS tune-up going?" I said, keeping my voice even.
"Oh… quite well. Managed to get that vortex manipulator control running more freely. Just needed a bit of WD40, who'd have thought? Replaced some of the Zeiton crystals. That took a while. Fine-tuned most of the systems. Alphabetised my CD collection. General bits and bobs. Helmet regulator still needs tweaking. Got a few other things to do." He sounded a little too casual.
"Won't take you long though, will it?" It was a statement, rather than a question. I was trying not to let the Doctor's imminent departure get to me, but sometimes there was a pang of sadness that I just couldn't force down.
He still had his hand near my head. He ran his fingers through my hair. The psychic link between us always lingered a little after sex, and I felt him brush a gesture of comfort into my mind, nothing tangible or audible, just… the whisper of an emotion.
But I appreciated it, all the same.
Which reminded me. "Anyway," I said brightly. "I have something to ask you."
"Sorry, Jack, but I think Ianto has already booked the church for us. You can be Chief Bridesmaid, though, if you like."
"Ha ha," I said acerbically. The more time they spent together, the more Ianto's odd, dry sense of humour seemed to be rubbing off on him.
"Actually, my question relates to Ianto. Sort of."
"Hmm?" He sounded slightly wary.
"You know that… psychic link we have. The… bond. When we make love… that energy we exchange."
"Yes… he'll experience that too. In case you're wondering… no. We haven't yet."
"I know that. And that wasn't my question. Why haven't you?"
"None of your business," he said lightly.
From what I could gather, Ianto was just a bit nervous of taking that next big step. Maybe he thought he might end up pregnant, or something, bless him.
"That psychic link we share… Can you… I don't know. Transfer it to me and Ianto, somehow?"
The Doctor paused. I assumed he was thinking about the question, but then I realised he was a little embarrassed. "Well… not permanently, no," he said at last. "But I can… let you both share it, yes. Sort of. It wouldn't be quite as controlled or potent as you're used to."
Better than nothing, though.
"Well, that's great. Why didn't you tell me that before?" I lifted my head.
"It's… not that easy. And I couldn't have before, anyway, not until I was bonded with Ianto."
That made sense, I guess.
"Okay… so… can you do it for us? Tomorrow night?" Tomorrow night was my date night with Ianto.
The Doctor sniffed. "It's not that simple."
"So… what would it entail?"
He cleared his throat. "Well… I would have to… act as a conduit. Connect the bond with the both of you, and then… we'd be like a… a completed circuit. You'd both share the energy too. But… well…" he cleared his throat again.
I could feel my face breaking out into a grin.
"So… you'd have to be there. With us. At the same time." I took my head off his hip and moved up the bed so that I was lying behind him.
"Not necessarily. As long as I was nearby…"
I leaned into his neck. "In the same room?" I murmured close to his ear. I wasn't sure how to feel about that, if I'm honest. A certain part of my body seemed to like the idea, though. I felt the Doctor squirm slightly in front of me.
"No," he said, almost defensively. "As long as we weren't too far apart."
If that was the case, then I wasn't sure why he was glowing such a nice shade of pink, but it was adorable anyway. I leaned over and kissed his cheek affectionately.
At last, he rolled over onto his back, and looked up at me.
"Yes. Alright, I'll do it…" he said at last. "Think of it as my gift to you both." He gave me a gracious smile, but still looked a little discomfited.
Although not quite as discomfited as Ianto looked the next morning, when I interrupted him whilst he was writing in my journal, and told him what the Doctor and I had been discussing.
***
I was beginning to think this might have been a bad idea. When I'd told Ianto what the Doctor had said about it being possible for us to share the psychic link in the way he'd described, he'd blushed a cute shade of scarlet and not said very much.
I pressed home the point that as long as the Doctor wasn't too far away from us, it would still work. It's not like he'd have to be in the same room, or anything. Not that me and Ianto being together wasn't anything the Doctor hadn't already seen, anyway. Ianto said that wasn't the point. The fact was, the Doctor would know exactly what we were doing, and the idea made him feel a bit funny.
Oh, you 21st century humans and your inhibitions.
Ianto had agreed, in the end, for the Doctor to join us on our date night, where we would all have something to eat, have a nice civilised chat, a glass of wine or three, and see how he felt about it then. I don't suppose I could ask for more than that.
Now the three of us were sitting on the grass in the TARDIS park, to which Ianto had charmingly brought a little picnic in a wicker basket, with a tartan rug and everything. The sandwiches had been politely nibbled, and Ianto was on his second glass of wine. The Doctor and I had stuck to mineral water. Now we sat discussing... well, nothing in particular, really.
It had soon transpired that when I was with the Doctor, we could talk into the early hours, and then some. When Ianto was with the Doctor, the two of them got on like a house on fire. When Ianto and I were together, we had a great time. Put the three of us in the same room, and none of us knew what to say to each other.
Maybe in different circumstances, we might have all felt a little more relaxed, I don't know.
I watched Ianto sipping at his wine. He looked on edge. I felt a little guilty by now. I'd wanted this for Ianto, and the idea had excited me too. But despite that, I didn't want to push him into anything that was making him feel as uncomfortable as this clearly was.
I bit my lip. "Ianto… how about we just… call it a night and go back upstairs, huh?"
I glanced at the Doctor. His lips were pursed together.
Ianto glanced at me, and then at the Doctor. He sighed and put down his wine. "Sorry," he said.
"It's okay, sweetheart," I said. I leaned over and kissed him briefly on the lips. I'd done it more or less without thinking, but then I realised that I'd not really shown Ianto any sort of physical affection in front of the Doctor before.
I glanced at the Doctor, then at Ianto, and then saw that Ianto was also looking at the Doctor, as though to see what his reaction was.
The Doctor looked a little… well, I'm not sure. A faint blush of colour rose in his cheeks.
After a moment, the Doctor cleared his throat. "This is silly. Look… all I have to do is… make the connection with both of you, and then… well, you can use my room, if you like."
There was a short silence, and then the Doctor must have decided that it was easier to just take action. He leaned over to me, and brushed his fingers across my temple. His eyes bore into mine throughout the movement.
There was a familiar flash of pink-white, and I felt his psychic presence inside me almost instantly. It felt like second nature to me now, but for the first time, I was self-conscious to be feeling that way in front of Ianto.
Maybe this really had been a bad idea. I folded my arms uncomfortably.
After a moment, I felt the Doctor's presence inside me withdraw, somehow, like he was bashfully turning away. I shivered, suddenly. It felt strange, like there was something missing inside me. The Doctor flashed me a small, comforting smile.
Then he stood up and looked at Ianto expectantly. Ianto got to his feet, looking awkward, and took a step or two towards the Time Lord. The Doctor reached out and softly pressed his index and middle fingers to Ianto's head.
I saw Ianto close his eyes, and then stagger back slightly. "Oh…" he said softly. He looked like he was going to swoon. I saw the Doctor's hand whip out and grab Ianto by the elbow, steadying him.
The Doctor looked at me, silently warning me that I should come over and take care of Ianto. I remembered how intense and overwhelming it had felt for me the first time, and I at least had had some previous experience of telepathic contact.
I quickly crossed over to Ianto and took him tightly into my arms. He was trembling. The Doctor relinquished his grip of Ianto's elbow, took a few steps back and sat on the stone bench. He averted his eyes as Ianto leaned eagerly into me.
Ianto looked flushed, his eyes a little unfocused. "Are you okay, sweetheart?" I murmured, my forehead creasing.
Ianto nodded. "It's just a bit… made me feel dizzy for a moment." He looked up at me, wonderment in his eyes.
"Hello, Jack," he said suddenly, sounding slightly woozy.
I smiled bemusedly. "Hi there, yourself."
Ianto gave a gentle gasp of laughter. "It’s weird. Really weird. I can sort of… feel you. Inside me." He smiled bashfully when I smirked. "Not in that way…"
I should have waited until we were alone, I know, but I couldn't help kissing him, there and then. A long, slow, lascivious kiss. He tasted of wine. I felt him melt against me, his tongue sliding smoothly against mine, his arms slipping tightly around my waist. The experience was clearly affecting him quite intensely, almost in an aphrodisiacal way. Whether it was an influence of our psychic connection or the wine beginning to take effect, he certainly seemed to have lost some of his inhibitions.
I wanted him so much. This was new, for me and Ianto, this sensation of feeling him in my head as well as in my arms. It wasn't as strong, or as intense as it usually was, but then I hadn't expected it to be. For all that, it was wonderful in an altogether different way; softer, gentler, and easier to bear. The presence in my mind and body was less controlled, it ebbed and flowed, but it was unmistakably Ianto. It was… different to being with the Doctor, but no less alluring.
It was thrilling. Familiar and new, all at the same time.
At last, I broke the kiss, noting with satisfaction that Ianto's eyes were already clouded with arousal, his lips dark red and shining.
I looked at the Doctor, about to quietly tell him that we were going to bed now, but the words died on my lips.
The Doctor had his eyes closed, his head tipped slightly on one side. He had his arms folded awkwardly across his chest, his limbs tensed.
And then I realised. Realised why he'd been so embarrassed when he'd agreed to do this for us, agreed to be the conduit for mine and Ianto's psychic energy.
Making sure that Ianto wasn't going to fall over when I let him go, I crossed over to where the Doctor was sitting. After a moment, he opened his eyes and looked up at me.
I smiled at him sadly. "I didn't realise… well, not until now. You can feel us, can't you? In your head?"
The Doctor shrugged. "Of course I can. Your energy is going through me. But I'll do my best to... stay out of your way..." He smiled tightly at me.
I shook my head. "When me and Ianto are… you'll… share what we have. You'll be able to feel it. Everything. Like when you and me…" I bit my lip.
The Doctor nodded.
I frowned. "And you'll be sitting here, all on your own." It was surely the worst kind of segregation and loneliness I could think of.
"It's okay," he said. "I said I'd do this, for you and Ianto. I want to."
I shook my head. "I can't do that to you."
I took a sharp breath as I suddenly felt Ianto's hand gripping my shoulder. I hadn't heard him approach.
"Kiss him," Ianto whispered breathily into my ear.
I thought I'd misheard him. I looked sideways at Ianto, my eyes wide.
Despite the open nature of our relationship, I would never even have contemplated doing something like that in front of Ianto without his express permission. Even though I was pretty sure he had gotten over his jealousy by now, I felt that would be crossing the line.
I had a strict mindset when it came to handling more than one relationship. Whoever I was with at the time deserved my full focus and attention, and tonight was mine and Ianto's night. Showing any sort of overt affection towards the Doctor in Ianto's presence was something I wouldn't normally have done… But really, I suppose I shouldn't have kissed Ianto like that in front of the Doctor, either.
"Kiss him. I want to see," Ianto said again, insistently. His fingers began to stroke agitatedly at my shoulder. And yet I still hesitated.
To my surprise, the Doctor stood up, and took the choice out of my hands. He captured my lips with his, kissed me slowly and hungrily; pressed his body against mine.
It was only then that I realised just how much this was affecting him. It was quite clear that the Doctor was as aroused as Ianto and I both were. Maybe all of this was a little too much for him. This was, after all, a completely new experience for him, too.
No matter how much control the Doctor thought he had over his body and his emotions, the situation was plainly affecting him in ways he hadn't been expecting.
When he pulled away, the Doctor's eyes were heavy-lidded. He licked his lips.
I felt Ianto's warm breath on my ear. "If that was anyone else, I'd want to kill them," he muttered. I turned my head to look at him. His voice had a dark, almost dangerous lilt to it, that for some reason sent delicious shivers down my spine.
"But this is the Doctor," I said quietly.
Ianto nodded. "Yes. And he's ours. Yours and mine. I can feel him, in my head. Inside my body. And I can feel you, too. I think I always could." He smiled, suddenly. It lit up his face. God, I wanted him. "We belong to each other, all three of us," he whispered.
I nodded again. I closed my eyes for a second, in an effort to gather my thoughts. There were so many conflicting emotions inside me, my brain felt clouded.
"I'm just…" Ianto's eyes widened. "I'm scared of wanting him. The way I want you. Is it wrong?"
I shook my head. "No. And you don't have to be scared, sweetheart. Not of anything. I'm here." I stared at him for a long moment. At last, he nodded.
The situation felt almost surreal as the warmth of Ianto's hand left my shoulder, and I watched as he stepped around me, put his arms around the Doctor's neck, and kissed him.
I watched Ianto kissing another man. My Ianto, kissing my Doctor.
The two men I loved more than anything in the universe were kissing each other, and I'd never seen anything so beautiful.
You might think it was a scene I'd dreamed about, even fantasised over. But it wasn't. I'd never been able to imagine Ianto with anyone else. I could never even think of him kissing Lisa, even though I could picture her as she once must have been; an attractive, vivacious young woman.
I'd never wanted to imagine it; not because I was jealous, goodness knows I don't do jealousy, but because… Ianto had always been mine.
I'd known from the moment we met, from that first second I saw him attacking the Weevil intent on eating me, that this handsome, sensitive, anxious young man was going to be mine, somehow, some day.
But now... this was something I hadn't anticipated. Seeing Ianto with somebody else... part of me had never wanted to imagine it, because that part of me was scared about how it would make me react. I think if it had been with anyone other than the Doctor, it might have made me feel something new and uncomfortable to deal with.
But this was the Doctor, and I'd never seen a more arousing sight in my life.
Now I knew how Ianto felt. What he meant when he said that when it comes to the Doctor, all bets are off. The laws of the universe cease to matter.
I reached out, ran my hand down the back of the Doctor's head, my fingers catching briefly in his hair. My fingers trailed lightly over his neck, up and along his cheek. I paused to run the tip of my index finger along the side of his mouth, feeling where his lips met Ianto's, felt the slight wetness of shared saliva.
I let my fingers move across onto Ianto's lips, and then I ran the back of my hand down Ianto's cheek softly, feeling how his muscles moved under his skin as he kissed the Doctor.
Ianto broke the contact with the Doctor's lips and looked at me; breathless, flushed. His eyes shone with exhilaration, marred with a hint of trepidation. I smiled at him, and saw him relax a little.
"We're all one person now," he said, almost dreamily.
I nodded, wordlessly. I could feel them both in my head and in my heart, both of their souls curling languorously around mine. A warm, insistent fizz of energy coiled itself around my groin and pulsed softly. I wasn't sure who was engineering it, or even if was intentional. Maybe it was just an echo of what they were feeling.
The Doctor took a step towards us both and put his arm warmly around Ianto's shoulders. A thrilling shiver ran down my back when I saw how willingly Ianto leaned into his embrace.
Then the Doctor reached out and took my hand. He glanced at Ianto, smiled, and then leaned over to me, almost conspiratorially, his eyes glinting.
"Captain," he murmured, the very faintest hint of a smile on his lips.
I smiled. Déjà vu. "Yes, Doctor?" I said, as evenly as I could.
The Doctor opened his mouth to speak, but then Ianto reached out, took a tight grip of my arm, and finished the Doctor's sentence for him.
"…Let's go to bed."
To be continued
<< Chapter One
<< Chapter Two
<< Chapter Three
<< Chapter Four
<< Chapter Five
<< Chapter Six
<< Chapter Seven
<< Chapter Eight
<< Chapter Nine
<< Chapter Ten
<< Chapter Eleven
<< Chapter Twelve
<< Chapter Thirteen
<< Chapter Fourteen
<< Chapter Fifteen
<< Chapter Sixteen
<< Chapter Seventeen
<< Chapter Eighteen
<< Chapter Nineteen
<< Chapter Twenty
<< Chapter Twenty One
<< Chapter Twenty Two
<< Chapter Twenty Three
<< Chapter Twenty Four
>> Chapter Twenty Six
Please continue to leave your delicious comments :-)
Title: Belonging - Chapter Twenty Five
Fandom: Doctor Who/Torchwood
Characters/pairings: Jack/Ianto, Jack/Ten, Ianto/Ten, Jack/Ianto/Ten (phew!)
Rating: This Chapter - PG-13 for adult situations (Series is rated NC-17 overall)
Spoilers: The Stolen Earth, Journey's End
Disclaimer: The BBC own it all, the little tinkers
Warnings: m/m slash | polyamory | threesome | angst
Description:
Set immediately after the events of The Stolen Earth/Journey's End.
The Torchwood team members are struggling to get back to normal after recent shattering events, when the Doctor turns up in the Torchwood Hub in the middle of the night; alone, heartbroken, guilt-ridden, and needing somewhere to belong.
"I'm scared of wanting him. The way I want you. Is it wrong?"
Chapter Twenty Five
I slowly ran my tongue down his back, starting from the nape of the neck and ending at the cleft of his buttocks. He snorted with laughter and wriggled beneath me during the entire journey. Then I started at the bottom of his spine and ran my tongue all the way back up. By the time I had reached his shoulders, the tip of my nose was wet with my own saliva. He squirmed again, and I chuckled.
"How come when you're horny that turns you on, but when you're not horny, it tickles?" I asked. He shrugged.
After a moment, he twisted his neck and looked round at me. "I didn't say you could stop," he said, with a mock sulky expression. "Anyway, after a few more goes, I'll get horny again."
I spooned up behind him, wrapped my arms around his body and kissed his neck. "It's a good thing I have so much stamina, Mr Jones, because sometimes, you're insatiable."
Not that I was complaining, you understand.
We were still covered in a thin sheen of sweat from our lovemaking; we were warm and drowsy, and pleasantly sticky. One of my very favourite states to be in.
"Jack..." Ianto murmured.
I made a hmm sound as I started nibbling at his shoulder. Sometimes I just couldn't get enough of him.
"When you... when you're with the Doctor..." he sighed. "I read what you'd put in your journal. And it sounds... unbelievable. The sex, I mean."
I paused for a second, but then continued my nibbling. "Well, you're bonded with him now. Haven't you...?"
He didn't reply, so I took that as a no. It had only been a few days, I suppose. But Ianto didn't have the same negative effect on the Doctor's physiology that I had had at first, so I couldn't really see what was stopping them.
"No, I mean... is it better? Than when you're with me, I mean. It sounds like it must be better." He sounded a little flat. Insecure.
I raised myself up and leant on my elbow, and bodily pulled him over so that he was lying on his back and had no choice but to look at me.
"That's why I didn't want you reading my journal," I said softly. "I knew you'd think that. Or feel jealous, or something."
Ianto shrugged. "Yeah, well. I'm still keeping it for a couple of days. I want to add something to it. And eventually I'd have broken into your drawer and read it while you were out, anyway."
I gasped loudly and put my hand over my open mouth in mock outrage. Ianto flashed me a small grin.
"Okay," I said, at last. "Answer me this. Which is better; coffee or James Bond movies?"
He frowned. "What sort of a question is that?"
"Well, you love them both."
"Yeah... but... they're two different things. It's not like a choice between... coffee or beer."
"Exactly."
"But... sex is sex." He unconsciously started to suck on his index finger. I couldn't take my eyes off his mouth.
"Wrong."
"Maybe I wouldn't know. I've only ever... well, I've not been with as many people as you have. And when it relates to you, I use the term 'people' loosely, of course..." his voice sounded muffled around his finger. I decided he was probably nibbling at a ragged fingernail. Whatever he was doing, it was turning me on.
I trailed my own index finger down his chest. "Sex with the Doctor isn't better than sex with you. Of course not. It's just... different."
"But that... energy you share. The way you both feel the same sensations. The way you... become one person."
I shrugged. "When you and me get busy, we share something too. It's not Time Lord hocus pocus, but it's still fantastic. You know my body as well as your own. Better. Like I know every inch of yours. Every nerve ending, every pulse... every pressure point... I know exactly where they all are, and what ou like me to to do to them. If that's not us sharing something special, then I don't know what is."
He nodded uncertainly, but looked a little appeased. There was a pause.
"'Get busy'?" He repeated scornfully. I shrugged, smiling faintly.
He took a breath and took his finger out of his mouth. "Still. I wish you and me could have something like that. Do you think... hmm. Suppose not."
"I don't think he could give us that power, if that's what you mean. I don't think our brains are equipped for it," I mused. I was seeing the Doctor tonight. I planned to ask him about it. If that's what Ianto wanted, there was no harm in asking.
There was a short, comfortable silence.
"Anyway. Prove it." Ianto said eventually, with a trace of a smirk.
"Prove what?"
"Find one of my erogenous zones and turn me on, then."
"What... just like... that? What am I, some sort of machine? My only function is to pleasure you? You command, and I just obey? When did we decide that?" I kept my face deadpan.
"I decided. Just now. Get to it, bitch."
We both giggled. I was already semi-aroused, just from watching Ianto innocently sucking at his own finger. Ridiculous.
I cleared my throat theatrically. I reached out and grasped his chin between thumb and forefinger in a stiff, formal motion, and turned his head to the side, away from me. Then I leaned over, paused to blow a slow, warm breath directly into his ear, noting how he shivered, and then softly and slowly ran my tongue along the outline of his ear, sucked his earlobe into my mouth, sucked it languorously three times, released it, used my finger to push his earlobe forwards and then stuck my tongue into the hollow behind it, licking softly for a few seconds.
Then I stopped, looked down at his naked body, and noted that things were already looking up.
"Ha," I said smugly, and settled back onto my pillow.
A short moment later, Ianto launched himself at me so hard we both rolled over and fell out of my tiny bed, and onto the floor.
I really should do something about that.
***
The following evening, I was in bed again, albeit a much bigger and more comfortable one, with the Doctor. We were in a similar comfortably drowsy, slightly sticky state. The Doctor and I seemed to spend most of our time in bed, these days. Some nights I could hardly bear to let him go.
Being in the mood for scientific experimentation, I was trying the same spine-licking trick on the Doctor, to see if it tickled or turned him on. A bit of both, I think. He giggled and moaned in fairly equal measures.
He tastes different to Ianto.
Ianto tastes of sweet soap, with a suggestion of coffee grounds and the very slightest tang of Flash Lemon kitchen cleaner. Mixed together, it's really rather pleasant.
The Doctor tastes of some exotic spice that isn't native to Earth, with a hint of woodland glade and the merest suggestion of banana, but that's probably only because he eats so many of the blessed things.
But I digress.
Having already made the journey down, I licked slowly up the Doctor's slightly prominent spine, taking a left turn on the way and pressing my lips and tongue against that sensitive nerve ending he has, 4.7 centimetres above his hip bone. He rewarded my efforts by bucking his hips, and reaching down and grabbing a handful of my hair.
"Jack, I am almost a thousand years old, have a heart. You're trying to wear me out so that I can't travel anymore, aren't you?" He said in a mock suspicious tone.
I grinned and rested the side of my head against his hip, once I'd shuffled around and found a spot that wasn't too bony.
"You've no room to complain. I'm twice your age," I said blithely. And I've got two voracious men on the go."
Not for much longer though.
There was a pause. Maybe we were both thinking the same thing.
"How's the TARDIS tune-up going?" I said, keeping my voice even.
"Oh… quite well. Managed to get that vortex manipulator control running more freely. Just needed a bit of WD40, who'd have thought? Replaced some of the Zeiton crystals. That took a while. Fine-tuned most of the systems. Alphabetised my CD collection. General bits and bobs. Helmet regulator still needs tweaking. Got a few other things to do." He sounded a little too casual.
"Won't take you long though, will it?" It was a statement, rather than a question. I was trying not to let the Doctor's imminent departure get to me, but sometimes there was a pang of sadness that I just couldn't force down.
He still had his hand near my head. He ran his fingers through my hair. The psychic link between us always lingered a little after sex, and I felt him brush a gesture of comfort into my mind, nothing tangible or audible, just… the whisper of an emotion.
But I appreciated it, all the same.
Which reminded me. "Anyway," I said brightly. "I have something to ask you."
"Sorry, Jack, but I think Ianto has already booked the church for us. You can be Chief Bridesmaid, though, if you like."
"Ha ha," I said acerbically. The more time they spent together, the more Ianto's odd, dry sense of humour seemed to be rubbing off on him.
"Actually, my question relates to Ianto. Sort of."
"Hmm?" He sounded slightly wary.
"You know that… psychic link we have. The… bond. When we make love… that energy we exchange."
"Yes… he'll experience that too. In case you're wondering… no. We haven't yet."
"I know that. And that wasn't my question. Why haven't you?"
"None of your business," he said lightly.
From what I could gather, Ianto was just a bit nervous of taking that next big step. Maybe he thought he might end up pregnant, or something, bless him.
"That psychic link we share… Can you… I don't know. Transfer it to me and Ianto, somehow?"
The Doctor paused. I assumed he was thinking about the question, but then I realised he was a little embarrassed. "Well… not permanently, no," he said at last. "But I can… let you both share it, yes. Sort of. It wouldn't be quite as controlled or potent as you're used to."
Better than nothing, though.
"Well, that's great. Why didn't you tell me that before?" I lifted my head.
"It's… not that easy. And I couldn't have before, anyway, not until I was bonded with Ianto."
That made sense, I guess.
"Okay… so… can you do it for us? Tomorrow night?" Tomorrow night was my date night with Ianto.
The Doctor sniffed. "It's not that simple."
"So… what would it entail?"
He cleared his throat. "Well… I would have to… act as a conduit. Connect the bond with the both of you, and then… we'd be like a… a completed circuit. You'd both share the energy too. But… well…" he cleared his throat again.
I could feel my face breaking out into a grin.
"So… you'd have to be there. With us. At the same time." I took my head off his hip and moved up the bed so that I was lying behind him.
"Not necessarily. As long as I was nearby…"
I leaned into his neck. "In the same room?" I murmured close to his ear. I wasn't sure how to feel about that, if I'm honest. A certain part of my body seemed to like the idea, though. I felt the Doctor squirm slightly in front of me.
"No," he said, almost defensively. "As long as we weren't too far apart."
If that was the case, then I wasn't sure why he was glowing such a nice shade of pink, but it was adorable anyway. I leaned over and kissed his cheek affectionately.
At last, he rolled over onto his back, and looked up at me.
"Yes. Alright, I'll do it…" he said at last. "Think of it as my gift to you both." He gave me a gracious smile, but still looked a little discomfited.
Although not quite as discomfited as Ianto looked the next morning, when I interrupted him whilst he was writing in my journal, and told him what the Doctor and I had been discussing.
***
I was beginning to think this might have been a bad idea. When I'd told Ianto what the Doctor had said about it being possible for us to share the psychic link in the way he'd described, he'd blushed a cute shade of scarlet and not said very much.
I pressed home the point that as long as the Doctor wasn't too far away from us, it would still work. It's not like he'd have to be in the same room, or anything. Not that me and Ianto being together wasn't anything the Doctor hadn't already seen, anyway. Ianto said that wasn't the point. The fact was, the Doctor would know exactly what we were doing, and the idea made him feel a bit funny.
Oh, you 21st century humans and your inhibitions.
Ianto had agreed, in the end, for the Doctor to join us on our date night, where we would all have something to eat, have a nice civilised chat, a glass of wine or three, and see how he felt about it then. I don't suppose I could ask for more than that.
Now the three of us were sitting on the grass in the TARDIS park, to which Ianto had charmingly brought a little picnic in a wicker basket, with a tartan rug and everything. The sandwiches had been politely nibbled, and Ianto was on his second glass of wine. The Doctor and I had stuck to mineral water. Now we sat discussing... well, nothing in particular, really.
It had soon transpired that when I was with the Doctor, we could talk into the early hours, and then some. When Ianto was with the Doctor, the two of them got on like a house on fire. When Ianto and I were together, we had a great time. Put the three of us in the same room, and none of us knew what to say to each other.
Maybe in different circumstances, we might have all felt a little more relaxed, I don't know.
I watched Ianto sipping at his wine. He looked on edge. I felt a little guilty by now. I'd wanted this for Ianto, and the idea had excited me too. But despite that, I didn't want to push him into anything that was making him feel as uncomfortable as this clearly was.
I bit my lip. "Ianto… how about we just… call it a night and go back upstairs, huh?"
I glanced at the Doctor. His lips were pursed together.
Ianto glanced at me, and then at the Doctor. He sighed and put down his wine. "Sorry," he said.
"It's okay, sweetheart," I said. I leaned over and kissed him briefly on the lips. I'd done it more or less without thinking, but then I realised that I'd not really shown Ianto any sort of physical affection in front of the Doctor before.
I glanced at the Doctor, then at Ianto, and then saw that Ianto was also looking at the Doctor, as though to see what his reaction was.
The Doctor looked a little… well, I'm not sure. A faint blush of colour rose in his cheeks.
After a moment, the Doctor cleared his throat. "This is silly. Look… all I have to do is… make the connection with both of you, and then… well, you can use my room, if you like."
There was a short silence, and then the Doctor must have decided that it was easier to just take action. He leaned over to me, and brushed his fingers across my temple. His eyes bore into mine throughout the movement.
There was a familiar flash of pink-white, and I felt his psychic presence inside me almost instantly. It felt like second nature to me now, but for the first time, I was self-conscious to be feeling that way in front of Ianto.
Maybe this really had been a bad idea. I folded my arms uncomfortably.
After a moment, I felt the Doctor's presence inside me withdraw, somehow, like he was bashfully turning away. I shivered, suddenly. It felt strange, like there was something missing inside me. The Doctor flashed me a small, comforting smile.
Then he stood up and looked at Ianto expectantly. Ianto got to his feet, looking awkward, and took a step or two towards the Time Lord. The Doctor reached out and softly pressed his index and middle fingers to Ianto's head.
I saw Ianto close his eyes, and then stagger back slightly. "Oh…" he said softly. He looked like he was going to swoon. I saw the Doctor's hand whip out and grab Ianto by the elbow, steadying him.
The Doctor looked at me, silently warning me that I should come over and take care of Ianto. I remembered how intense and overwhelming it had felt for me the first time, and I at least had had some previous experience of telepathic contact.
I quickly crossed over to Ianto and took him tightly into my arms. He was trembling. The Doctor relinquished his grip of Ianto's elbow, took a few steps back and sat on the stone bench. He averted his eyes as Ianto leaned eagerly into me.
Ianto looked flushed, his eyes a little unfocused. "Are you okay, sweetheart?" I murmured, my forehead creasing.
Ianto nodded. "It's just a bit… made me feel dizzy for a moment." He looked up at me, wonderment in his eyes.
"Hello, Jack," he said suddenly, sounding slightly woozy.
I smiled bemusedly. "Hi there, yourself."
Ianto gave a gentle gasp of laughter. "It’s weird. Really weird. I can sort of… feel you. Inside me." He smiled bashfully when I smirked. "Not in that way…"
I should have waited until we were alone, I know, but I couldn't help kissing him, there and then. A long, slow, lascivious kiss. He tasted of wine. I felt him melt against me, his tongue sliding smoothly against mine, his arms slipping tightly around my waist. The experience was clearly affecting him quite intensely, almost in an aphrodisiacal way. Whether it was an influence of our psychic connection or the wine beginning to take effect, he certainly seemed to have lost some of his inhibitions.
I wanted him so much. This was new, for me and Ianto, this sensation of feeling him in my head as well as in my arms. It wasn't as strong, or as intense as it usually was, but then I hadn't expected it to be. For all that, it was wonderful in an altogether different way; softer, gentler, and easier to bear. The presence in my mind and body was less controlled, it ebbed and flowed, but it was unmistakably Ianto. It was… different to being with the Doctor, but no less alluring.
It was thrilling. Familiar and new, all at the same time.
At last, I broke the kiss, noting with satisfaction that Ianto's eyes were already clouded with arousal, his lips dark red and shining.
I looked at the Doctor, about to quietly tell him that we were going to bed now, but the words died on my lips.
The Doctor had his eyes closed, his head tipped slightly on one side. He had his arms folded awkwardly across his chest, his limbs tensed.
And then I realised. Realised why he'd been so embarrassed when he'd agreed to do this for us, agreed to be the conduit for mine and Ianto's psychic energy.
Making sure that Ianto wasn't going to fall over when I let him go, I crossed over to where the Doctor was sitting. After a moment, he opened his eyes and looked up at me.
I smiled at him sadly. "I didn't realise… well, not until now. You can feel us, can't you? In your head?"
The Doctor shrugged. "Of course I can. Your energy is going through me. But I'll do my best to... stay out of your way..." He smiled tightly at me.
I shook my head. "When me and Ianto are… you'll… share what we have. You'll be able to feel it. Everything. Like when you and me…" I bit my lip.
The Doctor nodded.
I frowned. "And you'll be sitting here, all on your own." It was surely the worst kind of segregation and loneliness I could think of.
"It's okay," he said. "I said I'd do this, for you and Ianto. I want to."
I shook my head. "I can't do that to you."
I took a sharp breath as I suddenly felt Ianto's hand gripping my shoulder. I hadn't heard him approach.
"Kiss him," Ianto whispered breathily into my ear.
I thought I'd misheard him. I looked sideways at Ianto, my eyes wide.
Despite the open nature of our relationship, I would never even have contemplated doing something like that in front of Ianto without his express permission. Even though I was pretty sure he had gotten over his jealousy by now, I felt that would be crossing the line.
I had a strict mindset when it came to handling more than one relationship. Whoever I was with at the time deserved my full focus and attention, and tonight was mine and Ianto's night. Showing any sort of overt affection towards the Doctor in Ianto's presence was something I wouldn't normally have done… But really, I suppose I shouldn't have kissed Ianto like that in front of the Doctor, either.
"Kiss him. I want to see," Ianto said again, insistently. His fingers began to stroke agitatedly at my shoulder. And yet I still hesitated.
To my surprise, the Doctor stood up, and took the choice out of my hands. He captured my lips with his, kissed me slowly and hungrily; pressed his body against mine.
It was only then that I realised just how much this was affecting him. It was quite clear that the Doctor was as aroused as Ianto and I both were. Maybe all of this was a little too much for him. This was, after all, a completely new experience for him, too.
No matter how much control the Doctor thought he had over his body and his emotions, the situation was plainly affecting him in ways he hadn't been expecting.
When he pulled away, the Doctor's eyes were heavy-lidded. He licked his lips.
I felt Ianto's warm breath on my ear. "If that was anyone else, I'd want to kill them," he muttered. I turned my head to look at him. His voice had a dark, almost dangerous lilt to it, that for some reason sent delicious shivers down my spine.
"But this is the Doctor," I said quietly.
Ianto nodded. "Yes. And he's ours. Yours and mine. I can feel him, in my head. Inside my body. And I can feel you, too. I think I always could." He smiled, suddenly. It lit up his face. God, I wanted him. "We belong to each other, all three of us," he whispered.
I nodded again. I closed my eyes for a second, in an effort to gather my thoughts. There were so many conflicting emotions inside me, my brain felt clouded.
"I'm just…" Ianto's eyes widened. "I'm scared of wanting him. The way I want you. Is it wrong?"
I shook my head. "No. And you don't have to be scared, sweetheart. Not of anything. I'm here." I stared at him for a long moment. At last, he nodded.
The situation felt almost surreal as the warmth of Ianto's hand left my shoulder, and I watched as he stepped around me, put his arms around the Doctor's neck, and kissed him.
I watched Ianto kissing another man. My Ianto, kissing my Doctor.
The two men I loved more than anything in the universe were kissing each other, and I'd never seen anything so beautiful.
You might think it was a scene I'd dreamed about, even fantasised over. But it wasn't. I'd never been able to imagine Ianto with anyone else. I could never even think of him kissing Lisa, even though I could picture her as she once must have been; an attractive, vivacious young woman.
I'd never wanted to imagine it; not because I was jealous, goodness knows I don't do jealousy, but because… Ianto had always been mine.
I'd known from the moment we met, from that first second I saw him attacking the Weevil intent on eating me, that this handsome, sensitive, anxious young man was going to be mine, somehow, some day.
But now... this was something I hadn't anticipated. Seeing Ianto with somebody else... part of me had never wanted to imagine it, because that part of me was scared about how it would make me react. I think if it had been with anyone other than the Doctor, it might have made me feel something new and uncomfortable to deal with.
But this was the Doctor, and I'd never seen a more arousing sight in my life.
Now I knew how Ianto felt. What he meant when he said that when it comes to the Doctor, all bets are off. The laws of the universe cease to matter.
I reached out, ran my hand down the back of the Doctor's head, my fingers catching briefly in his hair. My fingers trailed lightly over his neck, up and along his cheek. I paused to run the tip of my index finger along the side of his mouth, feeling where his lips met Ianto's, felt the slight wetness of shared saliva.
I let my fingers move across onto Ianto's lips, and then I ran the back of my hand down Ianto's cheek softly, feeling how his muscles moved under his skin as he kissed the Doctor.
Ianto broke the contact with the Doctor's lips and looked at me; breathless, flushed. His eyes shone with exhilaration, marred with a hint of trepidation. I smiled at him, and saw him relax a little.
"We're all one person now," he said, almost dreamily.
I nodded, wordlessly. I could feel them both in my head and in my heart, both of their souls curling languorously around mine. A warm, insistent fizz of energy coiled itself around my groin and pulsed softly. I wasn't sure who was engineering it, or even if was intentional. Maybe it was just an echo of what they were feeling.
The Doctor took a step towards us both and put his arm warmly around Ianto's shoulders. A thrilling shiver ran down my back when I saw how willingly Ianto leaned into his embrace.
Then the Doctor reached out and took my hand. He glanced at Ianto, smiled, and then leaned over to me, almost conspiratorially, his eyes glinting.
"Captain," he murmured, the very faintest hint of a smile on his lips.
I smiled. Déjà vu. "Yes, Doctor?" I said, as evenly as I could.
The Doctor opened his mouth to speak, but then Ianto reached out, took a tight grip of my arm, and finished the Doctor's sentence for him.
"…Let's go to bed."
To be continued
<< Chapter One
<< Chapter Two
<< Chapter Three
<< Chapter Four
<< Chapter Five
<< Chapter Six
<< Chapter Seven
<< Chapter Eight
<< Chapter Nine
<< Chapter Ten
<< Chapter Eleven
<< Chapter Twelve
<< Chapter Thirteen
<< Chapter Fourteen
<< Chapter Fifteen
<< Chapter Sixteen
<< Chapter Seventeen
<< Chapter Eighteen
<< Chapter Nineteen
<< Chapter Twenty
<< Chapter Twenty One
<< Chapter Twenty Two
<< Chapter Twenty Three
<< Chapter Twenty Four
>> Chapter Twenty Six