I am left entirely alone.
How could he---
I hate him There is only--
There is nothing.. I canot bear this pain that will not let me sleep, and I want nothing more than to be at rest
How could he!
I have wasted what was left of my strength where I never should have..
Betr-- Abandoned by every last one ( Read more... )

I fell asleep in Heathcliff’s chambers last night thinking I should sit there with him only because I could not sleep at all. I do not like to allow myself to visit him there often, for when I do, there is always a fire burning for me that compels me to never wish to leave. But I was awakened by such a sharp pain beneath my ribs that I fled ( Read more... )

The cuts on my palms and fingers have much improved and so I will see if I can write a bit until my hand tires, for I have found there is little better way to settle my mind and strengthen my resolve. I have been behaving so foolishly lately, and responding to every slightest injury with such an outpour of emotion, I can scarce explain it. It is ( Read more... )

Oh, Edgar, I miss you so! How I wish I could write to you, but you have gone beyond where even mysterious letters transmitted by tea table can reach. Despite the fury that sill burns in me at the selfishness of your demise, I cannot help but pine away the hours dwelling upon the way things once were between us. I long for those simple, quiet ( Read more... )

How is it I feel the only person in the world who would care should I die now would be Heathcliff? Am I truly so wretched? Is everything else really so false? Edgar’s weakness has proved to me how little he loved me, but Heathcliff’s strength nearly frightens me in its selfishness. It is not my wellbeing that he cares to protect, but his own ( Read more... )

The doctor told me yesterday that he had seen a ray of shining sun in the sky; I find after so much time spent in gloom that I can almost scarce believe such a thing unless I were to see it for myself! Although to see the brightness of his spirit last night, such as I have never witnessed in him before, was testimony itself to the hope it gave him ( Read more... )

Heathcliff must know that I quite intend to scold him when I see him next, for he would not otherwise have kept himself so scarce from me these three days past. It is time he embraced the fact that one must behave the way one is required to, not the way one wishes, in order to accomplish what needs to be done for the larger purpose and the greater ( Read more... )

The stiffness in my arm has finally passed enough again to allow me to write, but I awoke with new concerns upon finding the tiny stains of blood droplets from where my throat had pressed against the white of my pillow as I slept the deepest and most dreamless of sleeps last night. After almost three weeks of time spent healing, the wound has ( Read more... )

I cannot understand what is wrong with me... I was feeling so well for so many days, and when I inspect the wound at my throat, I find it more healed than it has ever been, and yet the weakness has returned. My memories are cloudy and it is all too familiar, but I find myself wondering at the quick recoveries of the Count and Isabella, and the ( Read more... )

I am feeling better in a physical sense than I believe I have felt since before I came to this place. It has been over a week since last I was attacked and I dare to believe that perhaps the gruesome phenomenon has finally ended at least for my part. Isabella suffered from the blood-loss a few nights ago but she has been resting and it seems not ( Read more... )