Well, this has been an interesting month. My darling little sister Hannah called me a few weeks ago to tell me she was off to Ireland. Unfortunately for her, I'd already spoken to her fiance's mother and I knew she'd been hiding things from me. Not that I can really complain, I hide things from her all of the time. Doesn't mean I'm not going to, ( Read more... )

Heh, I'm a married man now. One of the most eligible bachelors is off the market and I have to say I'm very pleased with my Carrie being the lucky woman who finally snagged me. Our wedding went according to the plans her and Elissa had made and it truly was the best wedding I've ever attended, and I'm not being vain. Well, maybe I am a little, but ( Read more... )

Well, I did it. I asked Carrie to marry me. Felt like a fool, too. I'm a smooth son of a bitch under normal circumstances, but this had me all tongue-tied. I've never wanted to marry someone before, it wasn't exactly like giving a speech to the masses. Lucky for me she said yes. Now the planning has started. Not that I mind, I've given Carrie full ( Read more... )

Jesus H Christ, can't these idiots I call employees do anything right?! I ask for one simple task; find the transient that killed Bruce and take him to the hunting grounds. Him, I specifically said HIM, not him and his date! Just my fucking luck that his 'date' turned out to be one of the sisters of a citizen who was part of the group that helped ( Read more... )

Someone took out Bruce last week. Someone who did not have permission to hunt one of my biggest contributors and they sure as fuck didn't have a lisence! God damn it all, between Bruce being killed and the lack of a hunting lisence I've lost close to $50,000 in the past week. And who the hell am I going to get to replace Bruce? His crew is already ( Read more... )

Son of a bitch! Can I not catch a break in this goddamn town? This singing snafu is now burning up my residents. It's all fun and games until my voter's die. And the children, no one burns up the children and residents of this town unless they have my permission, and I sure as fuck didn't receive any request for this. Even if I did I wouldn't have ( Read more... )

This town never fails to amuse me. For a reason no one has yet been able to tell me, people and demons are singing and dancing all over the place. For the past two days now I've opened my bedroom curtains and been greeted with the most fucked up broadway looking musical I've ever seen. The gardeners are dancing with the security guards and singing ( Read more... )

Now that the holidays are over it's time to get down to business. Carrie and I have the Inauguration on the 25th, I've arranged for her to have any gown she chooses from the stores in LA. Mayor Maxwell owes me big after his coup on getting that rain of fire last fall. I suppose I could've asked Governor Terminator after that boring ass party he ( Read more... )

Ah, the holiday season; next to election day, it's my favorite time of the year. A time for happiness and kick-backs from the various deviants that I allow to play in my town all year long, who wouldn't be happy with that? Thanks to that unscheduled apocalypse, my Christmas bonus was a little bigger this year. Makes for some damn fine shopping for ( Read more... )

Citizens of Sunnydale, our current crisis has been averted. As a result of my strong leadership skills and steadfast courage, control of the town has been wrested away from the unruly gangs on PCP and law and order has been restored. I will personally be overseeing the clean up efforts and predict the town will be ready for the good families and ( Read more... )