It feels like shit that Stephen is always watching shows. This is what he wants to spend his life doing...watching TV shows. It's exactly the opposite of what I want. I hate it so very much. But it's technically his birthday, so I'm trying to just let him be. Please help me God, it's hard. I feel so alone all the time... He has said "I love you," ( Read more... )

I'm going to force myself to type right now and release feelings I have ( Read more... )

in the two years since I became a nurse I have learned almost more than I ever did in nursing school ( Read more... )

had the sudden realization that all of your problems are your own fault? For me it wasn't very sudden, but repeatedly, for years. I got into a fight with Stephen because I can't fucking hack being a mom and working and going to school. Right now I'm not even going to school. I literally have 5 assignments to do, and I am fumbling. I'm more than ( Read more... )

Life is goooood. Weird twist in events. There was some drama-ish. Now Krysta and Melanie and I are cool and Jessica and I are good friends ( Read more... )

This week:
Got to work 3-11 last night
have today off
cleaned today
watched some helpful videos today
saw my therapist last monday
slept comfortably and lovingly with my fiance every night
walked my dog
went to the gym
did yoga
sitting here now doing as i please
did a good job last night
snuggled with lu

I won't let this ruin me. I won't let this consume me. I will be strong as I have always been. I will continue to fight for my life. It is mine. No one, not even I, may take it away. Not even I may make my days stormy.

I have to live with myself. So I better get used to me.

I've been awake for almost 3 hours and so far the most of I've gotten done is washing my face, changing appointments, paying bills, and eating pasta.

To Do:
-music class homework
-gym
-tanning
-clean room and kitchen
-meditate

I was lyin in bed thinking about how much work my life is. Really....it's only 1 third of 5 days of my week ( Read more... )

Today is my first day of orientation at Bear Hill. I'm SO excited, and also really nervous. I need to just remember to be confident, but not cocky. I'm not expected to know everything, and I'm not gonna be on the floor or anything today. I think I'll be there til like 3, but I can't remember for sure. I'm nervous!! Everything will be great, though ( Read more... )