my friends page is empty. it seems fitting. everyone has disappeared. jess is off in new york, krista is still here, i can't keep track. i dont know what to say. strung out and tired and listless with no direction- i dont know what i'm doing. day by day. i can get through it. i have no path, just fog. i'm lonely. and sad. self isolated and ( Read more... )

I want/need a companion.

My job laid off all of it's employees excluding myself and a few others. I feel gross worming now, silly as that sounds. I met a boy with crooked teeth and strange beliefs about the world and how he should live. I have four jobs now, all stacking up to nothing but hopefully paying bills. I have a muddled direction I want to walk in, I don't know ( Read more... )

I got stuck thinking of how I was going to finish that ominous statement.
There's so much to catch up on. Life is trudging along, hard to tell if I'm doing better/moving forward with things, most notably my job. Meh. Who knows.
Lots of things are different. I need to use this more.

i just read this line in my journal from last summer, and thought it was pretty great ( Read more... )

So- to recap the last few months, as one should after a period of long absence, here goes: I finished Esthetician school, sam stopped speaking to me because he became scared of his emotions for me, I retardedly long distance dated phillip in Hawaii and subsequently "broke up" with him after realizing hey, this guy is a good guy but I feel like a 15 ( Read more... )

i miss my grandma so much ( Read more... )

it really sucks when you are not a person who enjoys grievous patterns, or vast amounts of structure, and you get used to a small repetition. when it fluctuates, there arent hundreds of other rigidities to distract from it.

i knew in the back of my head that today was my dad's birthday, but the rest of my brain completely FORGOT. who does that? who forgets their dad's birthday? god that's shitty ( Read more... )

i kind of forgot today was my older sister's birthday(meaning my dad's is also in four days). i ALWAYS forget when their birthdays are. oops ( Read more... )