emily isnt here yet so im waiting. poo. yea. so anyways, this is boring mom and matt are decorating for christmas and im sitting here listening ot christmas music my mom put on and i still dont feel like im in a very christmasy mood. i dont know how people can love this holiday so much. you spend one month putting up decorations and lights and ( Read more... )

feeling a little more upbeat. talked to jamie again today. he is nice. me and amber dont hate each other and lets keep it that way please! im going to a barbaque with ems today. its a family christmas thing. funness! christmas isnt my holiday but yea i guess i eventually have to get into the spirt. im going to disney land in like a week. it will ( Read more... )

why am i like this. someone fix me please. make me stop pretending. make it stop hurting. make the tears go away. JUST MAKE IT FUCKING STOP. some one help me please. hold me and love me and tell me it will be ok. just let me kno i have reason to live... just please....

Time for my longer update. i cleaned the bathroom just now. my mom made me clean. while matt gets to be with brody armstrong singing the night away. poo on him. the distillers rock. i was to send her on to alys house but since i am not there my goal goes down the drain. bleh. hmmmm the mall today was fun cept i got bit on the neck and my mom asked ( Read more... )

mall with sally. to buy pjs, but they were 30 fucking dollars. thats alot but they were pretty, i miss them! lol not really we didnt buy them. saw a friend there. hung out with those two for a bit and then i went home but it was fun and stuff i saw my dad there and he was meeting someone... for a date i dunno? but i think it made my mom jealous. ( Read more... )

you all wanted to know what was going on, well azim wanted to know and the truth is not much. got my braces tightened and they are pink and black now! plus i got bands...ick. they hurt. im going to subway for dinner tonight and my mom is going to call sallys mom bout california and then we also have to buy stuff for pj day and if sals doesnt get ( Read more... )

im sorry this has to be over. it was fun while it lasted. im sorry i have to move on. its my fault not yours. im sorry i didnt answer your calls. im sorry you have a gf. im sorry these will be the last words i say to you. im sorry you've hurt me so much. im sorry i stopped to think about you and realized i've moved on. im sorry that it has to be ( Read more... )

this are so screwed up. i need to fix my life and stop making it worse. it seems like everyone is mad at me right no. i dunno what to do im trying to make it better with azim. im sorry. he just got online and we are talking i hope we work things out. but he isnt the only one i have an issue with right now. also emily is mad at me or something and i ( Read more... )

i dunno what to do so much pain going through my head. im getting called a poser and a wannabe everyday now, but does that make it true no. im just me, let it be people! my god. i talked to michaels friend, jamie. he is really nice. well i dont think he is michaels friend as much as ambers. he is nice though. yea anyways. im so confused so many ( Read more... )

hey everyone. i am sitting at home just waiting for my ride. no one is online and there is noone to talk to. im so happy its friday. i just want to get this day done and over with! boy oh boy would that be nice. very nice indeed. anyways. i meet this guy named steven at the concert and he keeps calling me. i want him to quit. i think he likes me. i ( Read more... )