well it really has been forever since i updated this and really so much has happened. im just not motivated to keep up with it bc rebecca can hardly read it anyway. and then theres the fact that i have about .06 minutes that are free in my day ( Read more... )

I know all about your reputation, and how it's bound to be a heartbreak situation. But I can't help it if I'm helpless every time that I'm where you are. You walk in and my strength walks out the door, say my name & I can't fight it anymore. I know I should go but I need your touch just too damn much. Loving you isn't really something I should do. ( Read more... )

ok so here are my plans for tomorow, my birthday! ahhh!! :) actually, its really today as its already tomorow, but i still have to go to bed and wake up, so ill just say tomorow. well i just have to thank shelly soo much because she really really really has made my birthday a thousand and a half times better than it was gonna be. after what ( Read more... )

ok this is all such crap. how is it that nothing I ever try to do ever works out. nothing. not a flippin thing. everytime I make any sort of plans, they get royally screwed up. and not matter what the crap I do, nothing is ever good enough ( Read more... )

it was inevitable... necessary... the right thing to do. but that doesnt make it any easier. i cant even remember how it all started, whos fault all this was. im sure that if it came to placing blame, it would fall on both of us. this was as much me as you, tho perhaps in different ways. im sorry that it ended up like this, even tho i cant see ( Read more... )

ok so maybe i over reacted a bit in the last post too.. i just need to find a happy medium, not this unbelieveable roller coaster. im still going up, its gonna work. ill make it.

nevermind whatever i said in the last post im an idiot there is a reason i never expect anything good to happen to me and i was just reminded of it never ever ever do can i ever count on something so nice as that would have been to work out because it never ever ever does i dont understand what is going on what you are thinking or how much of this ( Read more... )

wow.. well, not much has happened today. i discovered that what i thought was just english homework is in fact an everest sized mountain of work. sooo much reading, and i didnt even realize it, so i waited til 2 days before my next class to start it. never again, for sure ( Read more... )

oh man i am so stressed.. i was sposed to drive to va this weekend, but bc of hurricane ivan, im not. so i figure ill switch my weekends i have off around- go up to newark this weekend, and go to va the weekend i planned on goin to see katie for our b-days. now im just so nervous bc as much as i miss katie and them, they arent the whole reason im ( Read more... )

you said u didnt want to hold me back, u wanted me to have a life here.. so i havent let u hold me back, ive had my life here. ive even tried talkin to other guys, seein if maybe they could get you off my mind... and the only thing thats come of all of that is that ive realized how i dont want to talk to anyone but you. i mean, the guys are nice, ( Read more... )