A wicked witch!

[no_fastolfe]

[OOC: For heroes who've heard of the wicked witch of the west woods, for lost damsels and innocent young things... for those wood nymphs she's feuding with... make yourself at home.] In the Dark and Dangerous Woods outside of the city, there is a Dark and Dangerous Path that leads off into the west wood

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[hourglass_twin]

A wraith-like figure clad in black robes walked down the path, pausing after a bit to cough a few times, white hair tumbling out from beneath the hood, before he decided to head off to the side of the road to make his tea. Spotting brooms making a garden in the distance, he got up, walking over to investigate.

[no_fastolfe]

The little nettles dug the rows... occasionally breaking out into a merry cossack dance. One of Rathlina's spies, a cheerful little mushroom, pointed her out the stranger on the way.

Visitors! Rathlina spared a thought to make sure her hair was suitably coarse and horrid.

"Who goes there, in my western woods?
Are you positively sure you should?
Rathlina the witch lives down this dark path
Give me your name and-

Oh you don't look like some rotten hero. Afternoon, your robeship. Armanita," she addressed the mushroom, "Shame on you. We don't harass wizards. Unless they have nasty little heroes with them."

[hourglass_twin]

A scratchy, rasping voice replied, "Afternoon. I am Raistlin Majere, and I certainly have no heroes traveling with me." He then began to cough some more, before wiping a way a bit of blood on his lips.

[no_fastolfe]

"Are you under a curse?" Rathlina asked. "Very cursey kind of cough that was. Or it could be the plague. We haven't had a good plague in these parts for ages. I'm Rathlina, the witch of the West Woods. This is Armanita and this is Arnettle and Arthorn. Wretched plant-golems."

[systmadmin]

Somewhere within the forest, the sound of carriage wheels were overlaid with the heavy noise of horse hooves plodding against the warm earth. After a few moments, a carriage rounded around a cluster of trees and came into view. The horses that pulled it clopped a few more feet forward, then slid to a slow and uneasy stop a short distance away from the cottage, hooves stamping nervously against the soil. The driver that sat atop the carriage harrumphed to himself--his head swiveling back and forth as he scanned the dark, forested area--then climbed down to knock against the carriage doors

[no_fastolfe]

"Ooh really?" Rathlina said, as Arnettle piped its report, a happy babble about horses and kings and carriages. But the witch had grown used to picking the meat out of their innocent chatter, and had gotten 'royalty' at least. She cracked the shutters and hissed out a command for all of her homonculi to settle down and lie still a while.

When the king and Gervais approached, they would find a happy little cottage, over-run with tempting, juicy grape vines, with a happy little vegetable plot and nettles and thorns growing in a most innocent and plantlike way along the borders of the forest. The only sign that things might be amiss was the number of brooms, lying still as brooms do, buckets of water abandoned near them.

Rathlina was waiting outside, with a peasant hood over her head. She asked, in a feeble and quavering voice:

"Hark and welcome, handsome Lord
To the comforts this humble hut affords
What princely task or dukely chore
Leads you to Rathlina's door?"

This port. It makes me lol.

[systmadmin]

The noise of their chatter would reach Rathlina before they actually did. Gervais had tucked the map beneath one arm, and then sputtered on--as they ventured towards the cottage--about how this place made him feel uncomfortable, how there were 'way too many brooms over there, no one needs that many, why are there so many?', about how the forest was too dark around them, and how they should turn back and try to find their own way to the city.

A good portion of it went completely ignored by Charles, and the bits that were acknowledged were brushed off with a obviously-not-paying-attention 'mhm' or a 'What are you babbling about Gervais the cottage looks pleasant, be silent.'The two came to a stop near Rathlina, and for a few moments, both of them silently attempted to pick out her face from beneath the hood. Then Charles took a step forward and rested one hand against the pommel of his sword, while Gervais lingered back and peered over Charles' shoulder at her, uncertainty visible in every inch of his body

But why sir it is the most srs of srs ports for srs

[no_fastolfe]

"Oh deary, deary me, my back," Rathlina said, executing a bare dip of a bow that only hunched her a little further than she was already hunched

[strangehstorian]

A golden fleck about the size of an apple flittered out of the trees, humming along with the song, and started shaking golden dust off her wand onto the various dancing garden implements.

Just making sure you haven't been tampering with the spell, carry on...

[no_fastolfe]

The happy flowers and brooms danced and shuffled happily, bopping and hopping around their tasks.

"You! Wretchedly good fairy! I can sense your horrid kindness from here!" Rathlina yelled, shaking a broom as she emerged from inside the hut. The broom shrugged helplessly. Just another day as a homonculus.

[strangehstorian]

"Good morning, Rathlina!" the fairy called. Her voice carried surprisingly well for coming from such a small person. She tapped her wand on a a nearby broom, which sparkled.

"I would be concerned about you living out here all alone, it's lucky you have so many helpers!"

[no_fastolfe]

"My minions were the scourge of kingdoms before you meddling fairies put your hand in," Rathlina accused her. "I don't see why you can't leave well enough alone! I only want to drown a small village."

[darknessb4me]

Arthas had been minding his own business by the brook when he'd spotted something moving in a way that an animal generally shouldn't be, with the wrong silhouette for a person - he sat up and watched it, frowning. An enchanted broom. Were there elves here? More importantly, was there a Quel'thalas?

[no_fastolfe]

No elves, not in the little clearing the broom toddled back to. Just a standard dark forest, and a menacing little cottage surrounded by thorns and poison mushrooms and a worryingly pristine little vegetable garden.

...well, menacing until some of the nettle plants took one look at their visitor and burst into a happy dance.

It's so hard to find really evil minions anymore.

[darknessb4me]

Lashers. He kept an eye on them. Oh, sure, they're dancing now.

Without turning his back on the plants, he craned his neck and called towards the cottage. "Hello?"

[no_fastolfe]

Another visitor! Her cottage was becoming quite the social gala. Well, more than she wanted it too, anyway.

This one looked like... well, an elf, maybe. With the pretty long hair. It wasn't wavy and glossy enough for a hero, but then some of them did show up in disguise. Rathlina decided to play it by ear.

"Welcome, traveller, to my humble home.
It's far in the forest you've chosen to roam."