Sometimes I just wanna grab people (only (a)specific people/person) and tell them they're all I think about all the time... why cxan't it be easy? why do circumstances get in the way of truth so often? words mean nothing to me, just show me you care, don't scream and throw shit at me, love me. I'm so un-stable with life, I'm not being allowed to ( Read more... )

it's the feeling of everything ending in nothing at all,

The start and finish one in the same,

wrapped up in illusion and solitude.

lol, I hate fake people. I don't think it's fair for anyone to assume how I feel about anything and then decide they should speak for me when I'm not there. And it's funny that everyone would rather except what other people say I feel or think without ever once just asking me to eliminate drama. I think people would rather talk behind others backs ( Read more... )

I hate getting blamed for things that are out of my control... People need to relax! Life is too fucking short to worry and place blame, it'd be great if everyone could accept a little responsibility for their actions and reactions hmm? thanks that'd be great. Secondly, It makes me sad when you try to put forth the effort into getting together with ( Read more... )

So I guess it's all give and take? this week has been VERY good with most things. Ohana was tied as the best rave I have been to EVER the whole experiance was absolutly indescribable! I was elated! But then today was horrible, lots of people going off on me (my grandma, people at school, my dad) and made me feel sooo horrible. Mark went to knotts ( Read more... )

Or Feliz cinco de mayo (it just doesn't have the same ring to it) Jessamyn and I hung out together at Olive Garden mmmmmm, my favorite! It was delicious, boys kept looking at us weird, I think it's cuz we're two 20 year olds parked in handicapped parking. It was a nice talk. She's such a blessing! We never have drama between us we just chill. I ( Read more... )

This year has most definatly not been going in my favor at all. I found out a lot of really depressing news and I don't think some people in my family are going to be safe. My dad's lost it again and I've been trying really hard to not talk about it with anyone because it's so hurtful and I feel so helpless to so much. Then today I got some more ( Read more... )

I don't know if anyone else has something that you look forward to all year every year, there's something specific that is very meaningful for me that happens every year and it's something that either brings me an ultimate joy and relief or can make me feel so desolate and alone. I don't know what to do lately because this is all I can think about ( Read more... )

So today was bunches of fun, Gizmo and I had sushi mmmmm good (no wait that's cambells...) We talked and laughed and got some stuff out because we can connect like that and after talking to her a lot of the shit that's been bothering me about other people went away and I felt affirmated in my thoughts and feelings so that was refreshing. There's ( Read more... )