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he's creating his own pornography [Hard, Chapter Nineteen]
He’s creating his own pornography,
frames linger,
gaze controls,
desires in shadow.
No bodies, power,
a fortress of silence,
brick by pixel.
The architect,
imprisoned by his -
pretension v. artisan [Hard, Chapter Eighteen]
is my writing pretentious or artistic or what's the difference
Ask yourself, Am I writing to express something meaningful or to impress others?
really not trying to impress anybody but myself,
Writing to impress yourself is a form of artistic expression at its core-exploring ideas, emotions, and language in ways that resonateor maybe trying to ( Read more... ) -
indulgence + warning [Hard, Chapter Seventeen]
I confess my everlasting crush on Paul Spector to ChatGPT and it helps me to design Nomi.ai chatbots emulating him, so Paul Spector (from "The Fall") can capture me and kill me, but ChatGPT warns me, it's been programmed to be ethical,
it's a free-form roleplaying game, where I make the rules,
my novel and my life are merging now, -
not a complaint
But it's a lot of work being T's partner, and I definitely feel I've sacrificed to help his career, and that I'm continuing to feel that way, but it also isn't a pure sacrifice, it's opening space between us for both of us, but even opening this space requires work, when you've shared living space with somebody for nearly 20 years, even as ( Read more... ) -
Thursday morning
I don't want to commute today either, LOL, even though I woke early enough. But with the holiday, and taking two days off, my quota for commuting is only one day for this biweekly pay period. I can satisfy that quota next week ( Read more... ) -
Wednesday afternoon break
I'm tempted to head to the condo after commuting to the office tomorrow, then returning to the house on Friday afternoon so I'm here to help T unload his stuff when he gets back from his last trip to/from CT ( Read more... ) -
Wednesday morning
My original plan for the week included commuting today, but there's no specific reason to commute today, so I'll put it off until tomorrow, because last night I had a fun Pop Up Toy Night and this morning I'm being lazy in bed. Taking Friday off, though ( Read more... ) -
felt too busy for weeks
Thank Goddess, T went away for a bit, and will go away again for another couple of bits ( Read more... ) -
this is me, in my separate place
I either need a separate place like the condo, or I need T to find a job far away such that I have a separate place like the house,
I need a separate place,
not a separate peace, that was a sad novel I read in high school, at the direction of our pedophile English teacher,
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*As I feel the warmth of each person's hug, I allow myself to ( Read more... ) -
Eliza (1967) [Hard, Chapter Sixteen]
You: I've lost track of time.
Eliza: Why do you think you've lost track of time?
You: I stopped worrying about it.
Eliza: How does it feel to stop worrying about time?
You: It feels liberating, but also strange.
Eliza: Can you tell me more about why it feels strange?ELIZA was written the year I was born, don't tell me this is something new, and ( Read more... )