Comments | iamshadow: Pros and cons

iamshadow

Pros and cons

Jan 05, 2014 18:23

Pros

* Having all my Potter fic up on AO3, and getting kudos and comments from some of you and some new people, thank you.

* Signing up for my first fest in years.

* Got a couple of loads of dishes done, so the kitchen is becoming less dreadful.

* Most of the way through the replacement scarf for prydonia* My brother thinks he will be able to recover a ( Read more... )

home, food, family, to do, depression, computer, knitting

Comments 5

(The comment has been removed)

iamshadow January 6 2014, 13:30:41 UTC

I am IamShadow21 on AO3.

random_yayness January 6 2014, 21:29:08 UTC

I'm not talking about an argument, or a disagreement, just talking.

This is me all the time the last year or so. I get so lonely and then I talk to someone and I get so upset and scared and hate myself and it all goes wrong. Now I can't even see other people talking most of the time. I have to keep avoiding Twitter and Tumblr and stuff for periods of time, because it sets off my anxiety and my depression, just seeing people talk to each other when I can't.

iamshadow January 7 2014, 05:40:55 UTC

I'm nowhere near as bad as I used to be, but I don't think that's because I've changed, I think it's because I'm very rarely in situations these days where I have to interact with other people. I'm not working, I'm not studying, and I'm not participating in fandom on a social level beyond talking casually to a handful of people I know well. The most social contact I have is when I'm away from home visiting people, and twice a year when I'm selling things at the biannual market, and the market I can do, because it's all scripting based on my retail experience. I'm anxious less, but it's because I rarely talk to people. I'm avoiding the trigger.

random_yayness January 7 2014, 05:48:28 UTC

Same. The only person I talk to regularly is Alisso. a couple of people casually on tumblr or twitter, but like, REALLY casually. /o\ And for me, the anxiety triggers the depression and vice versa.

iamshadow January 7 2014, 06:41:29 UTC

In recent years, the anxiety is more debilitating for me. The depression is fairly well controlled by meds at the moment, but the anxiety just sweeps in and lays me flat without warning. And my anxiety is complicated by PTSD at times, so it's not always as simple (hah) as avoiding people ( ... )