Damn. Laura throws me for a fucking loop all the time, in the best way. She's so receptive to having a conversation about difficult things THEN she recognizes the work she has to do. Having such amazing communication overwhelms me with love and respect. Just wow ( Read more... )

I wonder what baring my soul actually looks like. I can't seem to remember. Maybe I'm going to find out the remnants of my soft underbelly, actually became calloused and goose skinned while I was too busy telling myself self-love was the key. She keeps telling me, with what sounds like admiration, I'm so self-aware. For all my self-awareness, I ( Read more... )

I've been feeling incredibly anxious lately, and today I had several very strange occurrences with the humans in my life. I kind of need to separate what's real and what's not.

What Am I afraid of

losing?
seeing?
knowing?
experiencing?

Dude. Life is weird sometimes. I definitely have a love/hate relationship with humans.

It's been so long since I've had this feeling. I guess almost a decade, right? Where I meet someone who captivates something deep inside, something my logical brain can't identify. She radiates an energy that speaks to the vulnerable underbelly I keep hidden from the world.  When I've only spoken to her a handful of times on a handful of nights, ( Read more... )

I think I met the woman I'm going to marry. she's fucking amazing. 

I read this article today. I typed into my browser, "what to do when you feel alone..." then I journaled.

The loneliness I feel and want to talk about is the one nobody wants to talk about out loud. It's the kind of loneliness that comes from some place beyond the company and well wishes of other humans. It's not a lack of gratitude or lack of ( Read more... )

I maybe just exploded. I've been feeling some kind of stressed lately. Not necessarily because things are difficult, but I guess because I have a lot going on. Today I finally popped. Jamie's dad died suddenly today. Bailey, his now girlfriend, called to tell me. The awfulness bloomed in my chest and in the pit of my stomach, and it sat with me all ( Read more... )

Damn, I didn't look, but I know it's been a minute since I've posted a new entry. In fact, I bet it says the very same thing at the top, haha - how it's been a minute. I'm silly. Anyway ( Read more... )

I needed some self-love today, and I wasn't sure what I need/want. Everything that's going on federally and locally is crushing my sensitive soul. Everything feels so personal. All my identities are under attack to protect the fragile white man ( Read more... )

I like that in order to be a writer all you have to do is write something, anything on a piece of paper or in a journal, and viola! you're a writer. I went to a writing workshop last week and damn. It was the most vulnerable, liberating, nerve wracking, cathartic experience EVER. It was a really great workshop. The leader was really helpful in ( Read more... )