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I remember getting on the plane to leave... The last person I text was Alena. Not my mom, not my dad... Because I wanted to go knowing she was the last one to hear from me. It may sound silly but I wanted to give her that. She will always have my heart. I don't know if I will ever love like that again. And even though we were fighting when I came ( Read more... ) -
Ought
This fucking sucks. Giving her all this advice on how to make things better between her and Yeva. Being selfless is the toughest thing I've ever had to do... I just want to tell her how in love i am with her and how I need her in my bed right now. I miss you A. Every minute of every day. -
A
How is it that literally almost three years later, here we are. You and I, friends? Are we though, I saw that twinkle tonight. Maybe I forced it in my mind, I don't know. What I do know, I sure felt it. God, did I feel it. It might as well have been February 13th 2010 all over again. When I saw her in the airport wearing her white button down ( Read more... ) -
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I'm just so bummed right now...I can't believe Aja took her from me. She was supposed to be my dog. Mine. I had every single thing ready, I moved into a fucking house for that puppy. Now she still wants to come home with me after ripping my fucking heart out? You're god damn high. I'm so angry, I really don't know what to do. I had my heart set on ( Read more... ) -
Alena
You see people go through these transformations daily, but for me it's hourly. I stayed away from alena for what seems like ages and then it all came back in a mad rush of emotions spilling over me watching my sanity disperse. I am but a vessel waiting for her captain, and oh captain my captain has abandoned ship. We were supposed to be together. ( Read more... ) -
Life as of late
I miss her. Not all the time, only when I do something stupid like go through old pictures. Sometimes when I really just want to see that smile of hers I open up my skype history and go through te gallery. It's like looking at a time machine, she's there smiling back at me. Loving me once again. I can't fully explain the smile, it's more like a ( Read more... ) -
jack3d
I was reading about this new supplement called jack3d and i'm super excited to try it, i've heard nothing but great reviews and it's time to get back into shape. Like serious shape. I will be 160 before seeing alena. BOOM SHOCKA LOCKA -
Pussy.
How many steps back could I possibly take tonight. She wanted love, I gave her the cold shoulder... she needed it, I backed down. She opened up herself to vulnerabilities... and I insulted her. With one little joke I may have torn apart everything I hold dear. My beautiful girlfriend... it's over. I feel it, deep. Whether she says it or not, it's ( Read more... ) -
yuck
Insecurity ( Read more... ) -
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I've been having feelings of insecurity and just plain uneasyness. It's no kidding it's so difficult for me to get past the first two months of a relationship. My stress level is sky rocketting and my pessimisim is at an all time high. I just am not enough and I know it. I still am waiting for her to find out and see. She deserves a person who can ( Read more... )