A long time I ago I decided that when my kids asked me questions about how things work, why things do this or that, or why the sky is blue, I was going to be as accurate and boring as possible so they wouldn't keep bugging me.  I have explained why airplanes can fly, why draining the bathtub makes whirlpools, how we know if we are dreaming or awake ( Read more... )

Disclaimer:  This is not about Michael Jackson ( Read more... )

I was recently at the store with Munchkee and I was explaining to her why we couldn't park in the open spot next to the door because it was a handicap spot.  Today we were walking through the parking lot at the store and she pointed to a car and said, "that car is in the mightycap spot!"

This morning my Doodimus asked me for some "breakthist."

Today ( Read more... )

Beebs:  "I wonder what it feels like being a book."

Munchkee: "It feels FANTASTIC!"

After a birthday party today, Munchkee was showing off her goodie bag to her grandma.  As they examined a little bag of Twizzlers together, Grandma told her it was it was red licorice flavor and Munchkee excitedly declared, "red liquor is GOOD!"

Me:  "JORDY!  Come here and get dressed!"

Munchkee:  "You mean PIRATE Jordy!"

Me:  "Pirate Jorday, get up here right now please!"

Munchkee:  "Or you will spank Pirate Jordy?"

I ( Read more... )

A conversation between Munchkee and a lady.

"Where are Mommy and Daddy going?"

"Um, to Mexi-BABO!"

"What are they going to do there?"

"Um,  go to McDonalds and sleep and just run around."

Thaaat's pretty accurate, actually.

"How did you give yourself a milk mustache with a sippy cup?" - Daddy ( Read more... )

My kids are playing "camping" in the playroom.  I'm around the corner in my office listening intently.  I'm going to take a moment and record their conversation verbatim as it plays out ( Read more... )