So I can't do anything on it. *le sigh* Oh well. Guess I'll find other entertainment tonight.

It's how my moods keep shifting. I'm happy and then I get depressed. Then I trend back towards happy and it starts again. I just want a constant. I want certainty. But I don't have that now, can't have that now. Because it's not up to me anymore. I know most of the time I seem laid back and don't care and go with the flow, but really, I hate not ( Read more... )

...do you even see that? I'm trying hard to be strong, but I can't. Tears are just the surface. The damage caused runs so much deeper than that.

Part of me hates how I look all calm on the outside, but on the inside, I'm torn apart. I physically feel sick right now. My stomach has not stopped churning all day. I feel so awful. And I'm so paranoid that someone is trying to get in. I'm watching my aunt's dogs in her house right now and every time something creaks I freak out. I've watched ( Read more... )

And I am excited and sad. Excited because I love the holiday, sad because I no not what I want to dress as on Monday and sad cause no one is around. I had the big Halloween party that I attend every year last weekend and it was awesome and now I'm all sad cause it's over.

I need to go to more cons so it can feel like Halloween all the time.

I really hate job searching. I mean hate it. I try and try and it seems like I get nowhere. And people wonder why I get down on myself and frustrated. And then they wonder why I get snippy with them for telling me to "cheer up" and to get back out there. No, it fucking hurts when I get let down on the search so I'm allowed to be sad and miserable ( Read more... )

It's weird that he isn't around anymore. I wake up and expect to walk by his room and see him sitting on his bed, playing on his laptop, watching tv, but no, he's not there. It's strange to see an empty bed. I know he's fine at RIT and that he'll do well (he better or my parents might just wring his neck with how much they are paying) but it's ( Read more... )

I just ate some of them. If I die, then at least I know they were bad for me. If not, then hey, I just found more lunch! xD

Holy jesus I've been away for some time. I blame tumblr. I have spent so much time on there. That and LJ was down for a while when I kept trying to get on. Also, I've been on a kandi making spree lately. So many things to make! I made a bunch of bracelets, just finished a cuff for my friend Keri, and made a handflower and a bowtie all out of kandi ( Read more... )

So today I decided to go over to my mom's work and help her with some filing. I was also picking up lunch along the way. McDonald's is our usual choice so I went there. I waited in the drive-thru, ordered and then got up to the window to get my food. I was handed the drinks and the bag of food and was told that my flurries would be out soon. So I ( Read more... )