you know it's time for an oscar fashion post

[faux_teak]

This might be the longest Oscar fashion post ever, which is weird because mostly I thought the fashion (like the ceremony) was kinda lame and mostly yawn-ful. That said, here we go.

Best Dressed

Comments

[faux_teak]

Wait, turns out I'm not done.

Here's the non-fashion related opinions.

Best Speech (Emotion)
Hands down Marion Cotillard who was so sweet and genuine and crying and made me cry, too. And I love that she said the director "rocked [her] life." Yay!

Best Speech (Eloquence)
Daniel Day-Lewis, who is always well-spoken and didn't disappoint last night. Anyone who starts off kneeling to Helen Mirren in a mock-knighting ceremony and then thanks the academy for "whacking me with the handsomest bludgeon in town" gets an A+ in my book.

(Plus, this is what he said when asked why he kissed George Clooney on his way up to the stage: "I had to kiss someone. I had kissed my wife, so in the interest of parity, I had to kiss George."

Best Speech (Humor)
Tilda Swinton who was genuine and pleased and managed to make fun of George Clooney and his Batsuit's rubber nipples all in 30 seconds or so.

Best Speech (I'm Glad We Got to Hear It)When Jon Stewart invited Best Song co-winner Marketa Irglova back out on stage after she'd been played off

[theswirtproject]

hahahaha Renee Zelleweger is a hobag. I love that she looks constipated in EVERY photo. sourpuss!

I was underwhelmed by the fashion last night. My top three were Cate Blanchett, Helen Mirren, and Marion Cotillard, the only three women who seemed to care much about looking interesting and good.

I really want to see La Vie en Rose now.

[theswirtproject]

also, didn't this steen cojocaru guy used to be super skinny? or am I thinking of somebody else?

[faux_teak]

He definitely did.

[euryale000]

You liked Julie Christie's outfit? The red and pink were not doing it for me at all. Especially with that shade of red. I liked Renee Z's dress, but not so much her in it. When she was presenting whatever that was I suddenly realized that the woman has no eyes. None! Just a smudge of liner where they should be.

I loved Heidi Klum's dress. I am sad that all the pictures of Helen Mirren that I've seen today focus on her face and the bodice of her dress when the sleeves were so amazing. That gold dress on whoever that is is also fantastic.

I've got to express some surprise at Vanessa Paradis' black stockings. That doesn't really seem to be what's done these days. I don't think I've seen any celeb wear anything but nude (if even that) in ages.

In the accessories category, I think at least a nomination should go to Jennifer Garner's necklace. I thought it was really nice.

[indy_go]

HELEN MIRREN. She can do no wrong in my sartorial book. Viggo is a stud (though yes, the beard makes him look old), and Colin is one big ball of grease.

[faux_teak]

Yeah, I did like Jennifer Garner's necklace (though emphatically NOT her dress). Good call.

And re: black stockings on Vanessa Paradis... bless the woman and the lucky combination of looks/charm/personality that netted her the lovely Mr. Depp, but she's always been a total hit or miss on the style front in my book.

She likes the flapper sack dress kind of thing, which she has the gamine chops to pull off, but somehow she often manages to look sort of blah while doing it, which is confusing to me, because she's gorgeous.

After a quick picture hunt, I think I've put my finger on what it is (at least some of the time). It's the details of the fit. This year's Oscar dress was nice enough, but it looked like it should have been more fitted on her. And she often picks things that fall right at that widest part of her (tiny) calves and end up looking a little housewifey. See these two examples:

[aaaaaames]

Good run-down, as usual, faux_teak!

I'm pretty disappointed by the Oscars fashion. There were some highlights and lowlights, but it was all fairly obvious; I agree that Marion Cotillard was the best and Rebecca Miller was the worst. Everyone else was nebulously in the middle. There was nothing that aroused strong opinions either way, nothing to argue over. A memorable recent example was Uma Thurman's weird milkmaid-type white, gold, and blue (I think) dress, which I remember some of us loving and some of us hating. No one went out on a limb. Sad.

Anyway, I'll give my best- and worst-dressed, Young Actresses Edition:

Best:

[faux_teak]

Rosamund Pike is an actress I quite like, actually. She was Jane Bennet in the Keira Knightley Pride and Prejudice. She was a baddie Bond girl in one of the Pierce Brosnan Bond movies. She was Johnny Depp's wife in The Libertine (including a scene where they're in a carriage and he fingers her while she describes how she got off on him abducting her... go check YouTube, I'm sure it's there).

I don't understand why people don't tape their nipples if their in these situations. It happens all the time. Sheesh!

Also, everything about Lisa Rinna frightens me, too.

[theswirtproject]

Lisa Rinna needs to STOP with the facial surgery. she scares the bejesus out of me.

[tummies]

Man, I concur with y'all. LAME Oscar fashions. Did you hear it had the lowest viewership since Nilsen ratings began? It felt kind of low-tech, which was okay, because Jon Stewart was great. I loved the quip about inviting writers to the Vanity Fair party for once...and about Jack Nicholson fathering some children by the night's end. Gross, but hilarious.

My favorite was Cate Blanchett. The woman can do no wrong. She looked radiant as always: dark violet silk, ethnic accents (by which I mean the beading and tubing, and the mixing of sea-green with deep-purple. Who else does that at the Oscars!?) I think she looks (and dresses) even better when she's pregnant; I can't find a picture of the red satin dress she wore the first time around, but if anyone remembers that, you know what I mean. And does anyone know the woman who was sitting next to her in the much brighter jewel-purple dress? Was that her mother? They looked kind of alike...

Worst: again, the consensus on Rebecca Miller. Maybe she was trying to be subversive, who knows. Also

[aaaaaames]

Also, I looked up what Cojo suffered from...he had kidney disease and had two transplants (the first was removed after it got a virus). The anti-rejection steroids they gave him caused him to balloon up.

Facial puffiness or not....he's a scary looking man/woman.