Tara would be 33 today.

Since October…. I turned 36. More gray hairs. Ketamine treatments continued until the first week of January. They helped with anxiety, but really didn’t touch the depression. I did become more shop happy the day of treatment. I’m back to spending responsible again. There was also a day where, after, I placed down my name at ( Read more... )

I have lost count on the amount of times I have thought of doing this entry. The reason I hardly update anymore is because therapy has replaced this journal’s purpose as an outlet for my feelings. However, there have been several instances where this very journal has provided exact dates needed to fill out various forms (like move in dates, when I ( Read more... )

I never seem to have a lot of good things to say when I write these things. So I’ll start with the one good. I will be getting the latest Stimulus check. I didn’t get the other two. So this is a good. Now I can get the rug I want ( Read more... )

George is out of the hospital and recovering at home ( Read more... )

Bad news ( Read more... )

The world is driving me insane, and I don’t just mean the American terrorist attack on our own damn capital. Though that too ( Read more... )

Mom wasn’t feeling well for the first part of Saturday and all of Sunday. Her stomach hurt. The pain intensified through the night, so Uncle Mark took her to the emergency room. Turns out that her appendix, the one organ that scientists still don’t know the function of, needs to be removed. She will be back tomorrow ( Read more... )

Thanksgiving was a normal dinner with Thanksgiving food as the theme. I made pumpkin spice cookies with pumpkins on them, made with frosting. Only Mom and I ate them ( Read more... )

I had a dream. There was some weird house with a chandelier in the entryway. There was also a huge mosaic window in the entryway. Outside was like a farm. Haybales and all. Then my peaceful stroll around the property was interrupted by this horror game, a first person view, featuring myself getting strapped onto a gurney. And it wasn’t the “over ( Read more... )

Howdy. Slightly stabilized mood, but then again not, me here. Kinda wanna bash my skull in. But there’s a high chance I won’t succeed, so… won’t do that. Why the self- hostile mood? More tension between Mom and Aunt Karen. Aunt Karen trying to dictate my therapy (mainly wants me to see one that SHE thinks is right for me. She sees no progress in me ( Read more... )