i feel ok right now
though im not sure i will forever
im going to go watch dream catcher
ppv, makes me hot.
i cant really think of anything
important to really say - i need
to listen to the exploited - and
take my anger out on the world.

ps. dont play poker when your pissed
you tend to scream FUCK very loudly
every 2 minutes.

Always

sometimes ( Read more... )

& i sit in yesterdays pajama pants ( Read more... )

you took my hand ( Read more... )

dear you ( Read more... )

sometimes its hard to grasp the present. sometimes its hard to realize, that the things that you once had - that meant the world to you..are left as memorys - and there is apsolutely nothing you can do about it. we were suppose to turn their heads, change the world - prove them wrong. and all of that, is now gone. i cant help but feeling as if ive ( Read more... )

Elayisex [9:16 PM]: god i really dont want to just lose him ( Read more... )

i broke up with scott. did i ever truely want to do this? what do you think? no. never, im not getting anything out of this. all im getting out of it, is knowing that hes happy. and for him, ill do that...i dont really have a choice ( Read more... )

im writeing a letter, to someone i once knew. this is the most akward thing ive ever done, and had my mind tell me to do. a gut feeling if you want to call it that. to write this kid, i grew up with..who is going into juvi, and will be there for thanksgiveing. just to let him know, that someone out there is thinking about him. i told my mom at ( Read more... )

sometimes its like, all i ever wanted..i cant have. its like people find out its something and i want..and there like wtf are u doing?! ofcourse u cant have that, its what you want. all i wanted was to see him happy..i just wanted him thre, and i wanted to see him happy..and even that i was afraid of because what if he wasnt happy? im just getting ( Read more... )

i talked to josh, and we came to a conclusion. no more normal lydia around scott. when i see scott, im a big nerd - i have to look perfect, act perfect......be perfect - and i do all this, because i dont want to go home, and have him realize hes wasteing his time..but really, scott needs to see my inner weirdo, because i am so weird. i need to say ( Read more... )