[video]

[abominable]

[Anders looks pretty put out when he turns the video on, flopping onto a seat on his bed.] This is completely unfair, I just want this entire planet to know that. Here we are in a perfectly lovely, so far Templar-free alternate world, with blue ale and lovely, terrifying women and still there are sodding darkspawn!

Why are there always darkspawn-

Comments

[its_likealchemy]

Buy me a couple of ales, and you'll at least have the drunk dwarf part down. Lucky for you, though, I think we're all out of mad Dalish.

[abominable]

Varric, I will buy you several ales if you keep your drunkeness from the Commander's eyes and my delicate self away from the darkspawn for it. In fact I might buy you several ales so I can forget darkspawn exist at all with a good dose of drunken camaraderie.

[its_likealchemy]

I'm not sure you need to be drunk again, Blondie. [because last time was kind of ridic, man]

[abominable]

You're missing out Varric, personally I think the purple feathers would have really added something to your ensemble.

⇁unfailed lock!

[failedhorribly]

[She looks startled for a moment, before an indescribable look passes over her face. It's moves on quickly, though, replaced by a smile and a mocking conversation in which she plays both parts]

'Oh, hello Hawke! Thank you for enabling your dwarf friend to help us home, by the way I hope you didn't wake up with too much of a headache.'

'Actually, my head was pounding when I woke up and I've only just managed to get the feeling back in my tongue, but you're most welcome for the dwarf enabling, truly, any time. Would you like to come over for some tea, perhaps some biscuits?'

'That sounds lovely, Hawke! I'll be right over'

action;

[abominable]

[he's already knocking on the door when he sees that message, snorting as he calls to the door.]

Hawke have I mentioned eternal gratitude? Not just normal gratitude, eternal gratitude. Or I could serenade from the door, I've been told I have a lovely singing voice.

action;

[failedhorribly]

[She hits the button to open the door and is standing there with a wry look on her face. Maker, she is not looking forward to this conversation]

Believe me, I know all about your singing voice. [She stands aside, gesturing at the chairs in the lounge] Come in, sit down. I took the liberty of making sure there's neither booze nor brothers in the general area, or else we'll never get through this.

action;

[abominable]

[he makes a mock wounded look] You really do know all my secrets- I've sworn you to secrecy already, yes? No one must know my shame.

[He pauses in the doorway a moment, frowning. Did he really want to know? Not really, he would be happy pretending all those conversations never happened. Running away was infinitely easier and he happened to be an expert at it. But for all the discomfort he couldn't stand being the only one apparently not in the know. His mind was going absolutely wild with ideas, and all his good night sleeps consisting of broodmothers and shambling horrors hadn't helped his nerves.

He swallows the expression with a smile and finally walks in, taking a seat.] Very nice place you have here, very angry-brother free, one of my favorite qualities. A sad lack of that in the world. [stall stall stall] Hawke, if you don't want to do this- [he looks over at her finally. Part of him was hoping for an out, and the other damnable part of him really didn't want to force her to do something she didn't want to do.] I could ask

video;

[slayerdom]

If there's darkspawn-hunting happening, any chance I can sign up to be the mad Dalish woman? Or is that spot occupied?

video;

[abominable]

Hey- shh shhh! The point is we're not darkspawn hunting! Also you aren't nearly mad enough, kill a few caravans with trees and then we'll talk.

Wait, you hunt darkspawn? Willingly? Maybe you are mad.

[slayerdom]

No, but I've decapitated a quarterback with an exact-o-knife before. [ She shrugs nonchalantly. ] Look. Whatever the Crimson Terror's planning, it involves the darkspawn. We need to get rid of them before they do something seriously nasty. I think Carver said we could be looking at planet-wide Blight if we don't.

I'm strong, and I can help. So are we hunting or am I going it solo?

[abominable]

[LOUD. GROAN.] Always the darkspawn! Ok, alright, fine, I have a duty, or so I'm told. Repeatedly. I'm not really the one to talk to about the whole 'forming a monster slaying brigade of justice' though, that's more Cousland's deal. Or Hawke probably. I'm the healer, occasional fireball flinging one thank you very much.

I guess if you could use that I'll come along. Or if the Commander does decide we're doing something unpleasant and stupid, I'll let him know there's an... "exact-o-knife" wielding blonde ready for the job. Sounds fearsome.

[thatpompousprat]

Sorry Anders, but duty calls. Have to go hunt more broodmothers for the good of the Republic. Unfortunate, but it comes with the Warden Oath.

[abominable]

You know, normally I'd voice completely legitimate concerns on the matter but at the moment I actually would like to throw a fireball at something. Lead the way, oh fearless leader.

[thatpompousprat]

Technically it wouldn't be me leading the way, but a Lady Summers. She's the one who informed Carver of their appearance.

[abominable]

Ah yes, Miss Sunshine and Daisies herself. I like her, she has an appreciation for the finer things in life, not just darkspawn stomping.

... you will be coming though, won't you? I mean you are the Commander of the Grey here, unless that changes in the future too. I really hate the future just so you know.

[action, since ROOMMATES]

[refusestoscore]

Sounds like we've got some pathetic whiner here. Ain't I lucky.

[action, EXCELLENT B) ]

[abominable]

I prefer to think of it as 'civilly airing my extremely sound complaints on how I don't want my head bitten off by terrible, blighted creatures.' [Anders corrects, waving a finger] But we have something far more important to discuss here- namely that your hair is green. That's... actually that's rather cool.

[action]

[refusestoscore]

Weak people deserve to die. If you end up getting your head bitten off, that's your problem. I couldn't care less.

[And as soon as he finishes saying that, the smirk on his face is replaced by a disinterested look]

That's right, green's a cool color. Red's a warm one, last I checked. Do you want a medal or something?

[action]

[abominable]

You know you remind me of someone, an elf with a little bit of a chip on her shoulder. Ah nostalgia, home's where the heart is. Or was.

[he raises an eyebrow] Do you have medals at the ready for these occasions? I wouldn't say no. So, what's your name? Unless you'd like a nickname, I could probably think of a few.