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Comments 58

malvino September 21 2007, 22:08:33 UTC
I can't help think that you'd be better off thanking God for the million blessings you have had, and still have, than focusing on the things you think are cruel.

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osnadurtha September 21 2007, 22:11:36 UTC
Million blessings? I have 4 blessings, and 100+ heartaches. I don't see why I can't complain and can't be angry with Him.

Believe me - if you've actually read my post - for 25 years I trusted Him just fine and cared about people. But guess what? Pssh. It was pretty much all for barely nothing!

I *always* thank God for the blessings I *do* have. I just think the other 99% of the time is absolutely horrifyingly cruel.

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malvino September 21 2007, 22:22:52 UTC
I don't even know you, but (assuming you've not lied on your profile) here are some you may have forgotten ( ... )

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chaeri September 21 2007, 22:26:12 UTC
i'm not sure that's what he/she needs right now. in fact, i AM sure condescending platitudes is NOT what he/she needs. btw, its that kind of response to real hurt that makes the world respond to christians the way they do - thanks for proving them right.

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log_junkie September 21 2007, 22:14:19 UTC
I'm not sure how much I can help, but here goes.

I suggest reading Hosea. It's a nice angry read, jilted lover stuff. I think you might be able to relate.

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log_junkie September 21 2007, 22:17:37 UTC
Sorry, that sounds really presumptuous. Didn't mean to be so rude. I'm just saying Hosea helped me through lots of heartache. I can really relate to it so maybe you can, too.

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osnadurtha September 21 2007, 22:23:31 UTC
Actually I was thinking of God + Hosea love, and not necessarily Hosea's upset over a nasty fight with his gf :) So no worries :)

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chaeri September 21 2007, 22:21:01 UTC
i am not going to offer any platitudes or verses. i don't know whats causing you anger, but i can empathize, and i will pray. yell, scream, curse, throw things at God. be angry, don't bottle inside. its the healthiest thing you can do right now. that little bit of faith that he's even there to hear you will be enough. yes i know what you mean - if you didn't believe he cared you wouldn't be so angry. if you want to email me about it, you are welcome to do so, if you just need someone to talk to. i promise to keep it in the strictest confidence.

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osnadurtha September 21 2007, 22:42:44 UTC
I think maybe that's just what I need - this is probably what I need :( I don't call Him names or anything (too scared lol). But I think I just need to get mad at Him :(

Maybe He has a present for me in Heaven once all this is done - that'd be nice! But I wish I got a hint or something :(

Maybe there is no reason! I don't know :( If He had some way of letting me there is.. even just a "yes" I think it'd be okay.

But I don't even get a yes :(

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pastorlenny September 21 2007, 22:23:18 UTC
Are you going to give us any specifics? It will help us empathize and pontificate!

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osnadurtha September 21 2007, 22:28:44 UTC
Some of it gets really personal, but I can tell you that in the past I was abused by my mom, neglected by my dad, I'm a cancer survivor now (which I'm happy about, believe me I am, but at the same time sometimes I wish that could have been my ticket to Heaven, and who wouldn't rather be in Heaven, amirite?), and my parents didn't want to help me. My aunt and uncle did. I don't know why I have these lame-o parents (to say the least) who didn't even want to help their daughter :(

Maybe I'm supposed to stumble upon a cure for cancer (highly doubt it since I'm barely scientific) or something.

I just wish he'd give me a HINT of what all this was supposed to be for?

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pastorlenny September 21 2007, 22:34:29 UTC
To demonstrate the awesome endurance of faith that a Spirit-filled human bean is capable of?

Oops, you only wanted a hint. Um. A marathon runner has to have _________________.

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arago_sama September 21 2007, 22:38:03 UTC
Human being, not bean :)

Unless you're talking about being eaten with fava beans and a nice glass of Chianti...

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efriden September 21 2007, 23:01:48 UTC
"- I've been raped twice"

"- My body constantly hurts, and no one seems to know what's wrong..."

PTSD?

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osnadurtha September 21 2007, 23:05:39 UTC
It's hurt since I was born, so non-related :(

I was thinking it MIGHT be SOME sort of PTSD, but from birth? I don't know - someone once suggested to me that I might have had a traumatic birth, but that person is crazy, so I don't know what to think of that. They suggested a see a hypnotist... (LOL - you'd have to know this person - they have the craziest ideas - if you know Harry Potter characters, she's kind of like Luna!)

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nyessax September 22 2007, 00:52:22 UTC
Fibromyalgia?

There's some thought that people who are more susceptible to FM may also be more susceptible to PTSD.

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osnadurtha September 22 2007, 07:43:31 UTC
Tested for years and I don't have fm :(

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