flow, brilliance, and chilly evening air

[bubblingbeebles]

at once i am amazed that it's only been a little more than 2 weeks that i've been back in pittsburgh, and also am amazed that it takes so long to get through the ton of chores that appeared to keep my life running

Comments

[bubblingbeebles]

(also trader joe's has an enormous new bike rack and two unisex bathrooms; it is my favourite ever.)

[standndeliver]

TIL that refrigerated tomatoes generate heat. Maybe this is the solution to all our energy problems?

[lindseykuper]

That whole "don't ever refrigerate your tomatoes, they'll taste bad" thing is really just a conspiracy to keep ordinary citizens from gaining control and becoming independent of the worldwide energy infrastructure. WAKE UP, SHEEPLE

[gregh1983]

Proximal storage or organic heat sink -- you decide!

[knightofstarz]

ymmv on the following advice, but these are my thoughts from when I was interacting with new people:

(the "so, how's the advisor search going?" conversation is the most scripted and predictable small-talk ever. i feel like all it accomplishes is wasting time, not building friendship.)

This may be somewhat true on average, but if done right, you sometimes learn a lot about how the person goes about fitting into the politics/social structure and also what that person is interested in. You can also use it as motivation to NOT ask such questions and find more interesting ones as well, such as, "what do you like about Pittsburgh so far?" "What was your college/job/previous city like?" and my favorite: "Are you interested in X? Oh, really? I know a great place to do X."

sometimes i get impatient and refuse to invest any effort into actively building something strongOne thing that I'm sure you've realized by now but that seems to be a theme with all people but especially with you and other introverts is that you seem to evaluate a

[bubblingbeebles]

One thing that I'm sure you've realized by now but that seems to be a theme with all people but especially with you and other introverts is that you seem to evaluate a friendship's value primarily by taking into account the current state and failing to account for potential value that you don't know about yet because you don't know a person very well.

yes. i mean, the frustrating part for me is that i have no trouble intellectually knowing this (it is easy enough to keep in mind to the point that it causes me anxiety!); it's just there's this huge split between that and how it affects my desires and behaviour. like there's a tantrum-throwing child at the steering wheel when i'm socialising. you talk about you get excited by the potential, and i wish i could have a socially-mature adult in my brain's driver's seat like you have.

this is amazing to me; it is such a plainly obvious screwed-up wiring in my brain and yet i have no idea how to go about setting it aright.

[knightofstarz]

That definitely helps me understand and see from your perspective. I can imagine that being extremely frustrating. I have similar problem with being okay with pauses where no one is saying anything

[bubblingbeebles]

i am glad you wrote this. i didn't realise you had trouble with just sitting in silence with someone or with having an 'empty' conversation with someone you already know well (i guess i get that latter anxiety too, a bit). it's a good parallel.