Bones Fanfic: Show Me What I'm Looking For (11/?)
Title: Show Me What I’m Looking For
Author: biba79
Disclaimer: Characters aren’t mine, they belong to Hart Hanson.
Pairings/Characters: Booth/Brennan
Rating: T
Spoilers: None
Summary: When Brennan fears she may be incapable of truly making love, she asks Booth for help only he can provide. What will his answer be? Season Six. Booth/Brennan.
Word Count: 4,364
Previous Chapters: One - Two - Three - Four - Five - Six - Seven - Eight - Nine - Ten
A/N: Hey, another update. I noticed some people didn’t like that the last chapter ended up with them in bed without apologizing, but never fear, there is a time for everything. Hopefully this chapter will explain everything and make things better. Well, on with the chapter.
Also, I need to thank my awesome beta one more time. Jen (jsq), thanks, you have been amazing. *hugs*
Song “Feels Like Home” by Chantal Kreviazuk
Something in your eyes, makes me wanna lose myself
Makes me wanna lose myself, in your arms
There's something in your voice, makes my heart beat fast
Hope this feeling lasts, the rest of my life
If you knew how lonely my life has been
And how long I've been so alone
And if you knew how I wanted someone to come along
And change my life the way you've done
It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me
It feels like I'm all the way back where I come from
It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me
It feels like I'm all the way back where I belong
A window breaks, down a long, dark street
And a siren wails, in the night
But I'm alright, 'cause I have you here with me
And I can almost see, through the dark there is light
If you knew how much this moment means to me
And how long I've waited for your touch
And if you knew how happy you are making me
I never thought that I'd love anyone so much
Chapter 11
John and Olivia were lying in bed, cuddled in each other’s arms. They had been talking about their baby and reveling in their happiness.
John sighed. “It’s such a shame Booth and Temperance left - I was really hoping the two of them would…”
“Oh, trust me honey, they’re still here…”
“What?” He rose up turning to look at his wife with a ‘what are you up to now’ expression, telling her he knew her all too well.
“They didn’t leave, that I’m sure of.”
“How do you know?”
“Well, Brennan and I had a little talk.”
“Olivia Grace, what did you do?”
“Booth’s not the only one who needed to regroup.”
“You eavesdropped on us?” He asked, giving her a disapproving look. “And exactly what did you say to Temperance?”
“Oh no you don’t… you never tell me anything you and Booth discuss, so it’s only fair we women have to have our secrets too. Although, I’ll tell you this much, when Booth returned to the house tonight, he was in for quite a shock.”
“A good shock, I take it.”
“It was the surprise of his life.”
“Can I ask you something?”
“Of course.”
“Does Temperance… I mean are her feelings the same?”
“As Booth’s?”
John gave her a ‘Ok you tell me and I’ll tell you’ look. “Yes, are they?”
“She’s head over heels, she’s just confused and figuring it out about now,” Olivia said smiling. “He’s not going to know what hit him.”
“Thank God.”
They turned out the lights, spooning together, ready for some sleep.
X-X-X-X-X-X
Booth walked into the bedroom, wearing only a pair of shorts. He was carrying a tray that held an array of food. He stopped as he reached the bed. He smiled at Brennan who was still fast asleep on her side. Her hair fanned the pillow; her face had a slight smile. He hated to wake her, but he knew she had to be as starving as he was. Neither of them had eaten since lunch.
He placed the tray on the empty side of the bed, bending down to nibble on her ear. “Time to wake up, Bones.”
She stirred slightly, stretching out a hand to caress his chest. She moved her body closer to his, whatever tension they had experienced this weekend was long gone, replaced by the intimacy unique to lovers.
“Hmmm… what time is it?”
“It’s about 1:30, I thought you might be hungry.”
She sat up in the bed holding the sheet around her, he smiled at her modesty. “I am ravenous… ”
“I know, me too. But I think we should eat first,” Booth teased her.
She reached out to swat him, but he moved just in time.
She giggled, “So, I see you haven’t had enough yet?”
“Have you?” His eyes twinkled knowingly.
“What do you think?” Her voice was deep, raspy from sleep. She looked delicious, her hair was disheveled, and her face was glowing. She was even more beautiful than before.
“I’ll show you in a little while…” He sat down across from her on the bed, pulling the tray between them. There were assorted fruits, French bread, and cheeses. He had wine in two crystal glasses.
“Hmmm, this looks good.” She sighed contently. He took a grape from the fruit plate, putting it up to her mouth, she accepted it hungrily.
“Hey watch the finger!” He said pulling it to safety.
“Oh, you’re afraid I’ll hurt you.”
“No, should I be?” He asked, momentarily serious.
“I think you can cancel your added insurance coverage.”
“I think I’ll keep it, just in case. I’ve seen you mad!”
She put a strawberry up to his lips; he bit into it, looking into her eyes. “I’m not very hungry anymore, are you?”
“Nothing’s hot, so I suppose we could have it later.” She was smiling coquettishly.
“Oh I wouldn’t say nothing.” His chocolate eyes were flaming with mischief as he got up on the bed on all fours.
He pulled at the sheet that was wrapped around her, “God, you are gorgeous, Bones.”
She pulled her arms around him as they made love again in the most wonderful night of their lives.
X-X-X-X-X-X
Later they were eating together by the fireplace. They were sitting on the couch, taking turns feeding each other the fruit and cheese, sipping on wine. They were both sleepy, but neither wanted to waste a moment of the time they had together. It was going by all too quickly, they were painfully aware of it.
“Bones,” he said resting his hand familiarly on her leg.
“Hmmm…”
“What changed tonight?” He asked, remembering his return to the cottage earlier after that awful fight. He would never forget that moment, finding her here waiting for him.
“You have very good friends, Booth. I can see why you feel comfortable confiding in them.”
“Bones, I didn’t mean to betray you by telling John. I swear. I needed to talk to someone about all
this...” His eyes told her he was sincere. “I had to be sure that it was right for you and me. I acted like
such a jerk the whole way here, the fighting and, everything. I had some doubts…”
“Do you still have some doubts? Do you regret us doing this?”
“No.” He shook his head as he moved to kiss her. They stopped talking, getting quite distracted with each other. As they took a breather, Booth whispered “Please forgive me?”
“So, when you talked to John, you felt better?”
“Yeah, I trust him. He’s always honest with me, there’s no bullshit between us, you know?”
She nodded. “Did you tell him everything?” Her voice revealed she was not entirely thrilled.
“Yes. He knows everything.” Including how much I love you, he wished he could say it out loud.
“But what I said, what you overheard on the phone, it wasn’t what I meant. I know it sounded awful.” He passed his hand over his eyes shaking his head.
“You said you felt sorry for me, Booth. I thought that was the whole reason…”
“No.” He touched her arm...”There’s nothing about you to feel sorry for, Bones, don’t you know that? You’re intelligent and beautiful. I only felt bad for the way you’ve been treated and what was happening now. I wanted to somehow take that pain away from you, to make it all better. After everything that happened on the way here, I wasn’t sure anymore that I could do that for you. That’s why I told him.”
Brennan’s eyes filled a little as she touched his face, “You have taken it away, Booth.” She said in a whisper, “I never thought I’d be able to say that.”
Booth kissed her head, wrapping his arms around her, pulling her closer to him on the couch.
“So, you forgive me for telling John?” He asked hopefully.
“It’s just a little weird knowing he knows about most of my life.”
“Bones, John’s a great guy. He’s like a brother to me. He would never think any less of you. He’s not the type of person who judges people; he accepts them as they are. He understands everyone has baggage, it’s just packed differently.”
She laughed softly, “Are you referring to my luggage again?”
“Absolutely.” He said smiling.
“Booth, I wish I could tell you I changed my mind on my own, but I didn’t.”
“How did you change it then?”
“I had a little help. While I was packing, Olivia came.”
“Oh.” He said understanding a little better how things turned around so quickly. “She’s quite a woman.”
“Yes, she is. Very wise. I really like her.”
“What did she say?”
“She said that I needed to stop running away from my fears and embrace the chance to be here with you. She was right.”
Booth took her hand.
“Bones, I was wondering, haven’t you told Angela all of it yet? I mean, she is your best friend.”
“Well, I told her some things, but not everything I told you.”
“I won’t ever say anything to anyone else.” He assured her, kissing her fingers.
“I know you won’t.” She said forgiving him with her eyes.
“Does Angela know about this weekend?”
“She knows that I’m with someone, she doesn’t know it’s you.”
“Why not?”
“I didn’t know if I should bother telling her, it’s just a weekend… ” She said holding her breath, hoping he would say something to indicate she was wrong. “She would have had so many questions, and she would demand to know every little detail.”
“Oh. Yeah I guess you’re right. I can just see Angela calling every ten minutes wanting every detail.”
Booth said shaking his head trying to ignore the ‘just a weekend’ comment Brennan made.
“Yeah, she probably would have stowed away in one of my suitcases if she knew it was you.”
“You mean there’s room?” He asked surprised.
She tipped the wine glass in her hand, threatening to pour it on his bare chest.
“Ok ok...” He said grabbing the glass, he gave her a sip, and then took one himself.
“What are you going to tell her when you get back? I mean about not seeing this guy anymore?”
“I’ll be seeing him every day.” She said trying to make the reality facing her more bearable.
“Yeah.”
“Booth, what I said about the retaliating, I don’t believe that. I was just angry. I know you would never hurt me on purpose. I’m sorry I said that, and I’m sorry I hurt you that day on those steps. It was the last thing I wanted to do.”
“I would never do that, Bones. Hurting you is the last thing I want to do. And I forgave you for that day a long time ago. Moving on was really hard, but it was necessary.”
He didn’t see the shock on her face, but hearing him tell her that he had moved on from her hurt her more than she could ever say.
“That day is in the past, we have to look into the future, Bones.”
“You are right.” She said reaching for his hand. “Can I ask you a question? You have to answer honestly.”
“Of course, Bones.”
“Did you love Hannah?”
He took a moment, “Yes, I did.”
“Do you still?”
“I think I do, but it’s still pretty recent, Bones. It’s only been three months.”
“I see.”
“But we would never have worked out.”
“Why? She seemed perfect, and both of you seemed to be in sync with everything.”
“She didn’t want kids; she didn’t want to get married. We clashed for a while, and I would have accepted that because I loved her, but the problem was that she wanted to move because of her job, and I wouldn’t leave Parker behind, there was no way. She chose the job over me, and she left. So I guess I wasn’t as important to her as I thought I was.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I think it was for the best. It wouldn’t have worked anyway. It wasn’t meant to be. God closes a door and open a window. I’m sure that there is a reason for us not to be together.” In his mind it was Brennan.
“You will find someone who will love you and put you first, I have no doubt about that, Booth.” I just wish it was me.
“I’m sure I will too, it’s just a matter of time.”
She gave him a kiss. “I’m getting kind of cold…” She said getting up out of his arms. “I think I’ll take a hot bath.” She didn’t want a bath, but she just needed some time along after their talk.
“Ok…” He said still wrestling with this deal they made. He wanted to honor it, but he didn’t know how in the world he would. How could he have her at this moment, but not be in her heart. Surely, she was in his.
X-X-X-X-X-X
Brennan was lying in the tub of warm bubbly water. Her mind was spinning with thoughts of how wonderful it had been. A part of her was sad, knowing it wouldn’t last. Booth had every chance to say anything, but he didn’t. No matter how much she wished it were different, she realized, she was lucky she had him now to live in the moment and stop thinking about tomorrow.
Booth sat in the bedroom, still staring into the fire. I want to tell her, but how can I? If I do, and it’s not what she wants too, how do we keep working together? We almost ruined it once, I don’t think we can survive a second time. It would be way too awkward. So, pull yourself together, Booth. You have her this weekend. Some people never even have that much, so make the most of it.
X-X-X-X-X-X
The bathroom door opened quietly. Booth looked at her so peaceful, her head resting on the Jacuzzi tub,
her eyes closed.
He walked in, kneeling by the side of the tub.
She opened her eyes, “Hey.” She said reaching out to touch his face.
“I thought maybe you might need someone to wash your back.” His voice told her he was thinking of
something else.
“That’s nice, do you want to come in?”
“Nah, no baths for me. I usually take showers.”
“Oh, too bad, I bet I could get you to change your mind.”
“Haven’t you done enough betting lately?” He still couldn’t quite believe she had offered him up
so freely.
“Don’t you want to know what you get if you win?”
“Angela?” He asked anxiously.
The splash of water hit him squarely in the face.
“Bones, you know better than to start something you can’t finish.”
“I never said I wasn’t planning to finish it.” She said seductively.
“Well, in that case, move over Bones, I’m about to see you and raise you on that bet.”
Booth pulled the curtain closed behind him. Their laughter echoed throughout the bathroom as they immersed themselves in each other once more.
They burrowed in the bed together, talking and laughing into the early hours. As the morning sun rose to light their Le Havre with a rosy glow, the two lovers laid in each other’s arms sound asleep.
X-X-X-X-X-X
Booth stirred from his sleep reaching out to embrace Brennan, his hand touched an empty pillow. He looked around the room wondering where she could be. The faint scent of her perfume made him miss her more. He closed his eyes, savoring the memories of their incredible night together.
Getting out of bed, he pulled on his sweat pants, washing up in the bathroom and combing his hair. Foregoing shaving in his desire to find her, he headed downstairs. Sounds from the kitchen guided him to the door. He opened it halfway, looking to see what she was up to.
The sunlight was streaming in through the kitchen window, casting a hazy golden light around her. He stopped, mesmerized by the image in front of him. Booth knew now, what it was like to hold her in his arms through the night, to be so close to her that there was no separation, no distance, no beginning, no end. This woman had come to mean more to him than he ever dreamed. He envisioned his life with her standing by his side. The happiness she brought to him, gave his life new meaning, everything had changed.
The sound of her sweet singing brought him out of his daydreams. She was wearing her silky red gown, standing in the middle of the kitchen, working diligently at preparing breakfast. He stayed hidden by the door, drinking in the beauty of this new morning.
Brennan finished mixing the eggs, taking a bag of flour she attempted to pour it into a measuring cup. The
opening in the bag was not allowing any flour to escape. Brennan bent down to open it more and while squeezing the bag, a poof of flour hit her in the face. She ignored it, intent on cooking the perfect breakfast. Booth held back his laughter, he was enchanted by her.
He spied a tray on the table holding two glasses of juice, silverware, and a vase with a bouquet of wild roses. He watched her a little longer; her smile never left her face.
He shut the door quietly, hurrying up the stairs to the bedroom.
Booth surveyed his perfect hair in the mirror over the dresser, he swiped at it messing it back into bed hair, shedding his sweats he jumped back into bed, waiting impatiently for her to appear.
Brennan was still humming softly as she climbed the stairs carrying her feast.
Booth laid there in eager anticipation, smiling. As he heard her draw nearer, he snuggled down in the bed pretending to be sound asleep.
She walked into the room, smiling sweetly as she observed his peaceful expression. She set the tray on the dresser, tiptoeing over to the bed to indulge in her favorite pastime - Booth watching. An unruly lock of his hair beckoned to her, she reached out to push it off his forehead; it felt so good to be able to touch it freely. A momentary rush of sadness swept over her as she realized how soon everything would be back to normal between them. Her hand touched his face.
Booth chose this moment to make his move, pulling her on top of him, cuddling her in his arms. Brennan screamed out in surprise and then in laughter realizing she got caught.
“Why Bones… ” he said. “...are you making improper advances on me?” His eyes told her he hoped so.
She looked up at him batting her eyelashes exaggeratingly, “Yes, I am.”
“Good, because for a minute there, I thought maybe you lost a contact lens.”
“Very funny.”
“Hey, where are those advances? I’m still waiting.” He asked giving her an expectant look.
“Well, I would, but then our breakfast would get cold.”
“Our breakfast?” He questioned innocently.
“Yes.” She said looking pleased, he let her go. She walked over to the dresser to pick up the tray,
motioning with her eyes and her chin that he should get up. He sat up in bed smiling at her.
“What have we here?” He asked not wanting to spoil her surprise.
“Scrambled eggs, biscuits with honey, and fresh squeezed orange juice.” She said delighting in his
amazed look.
“You cooked it?” He asked feigning fear, enjoying what he knew would be indignation from her.
“Hey, I’ll have you know, I can cook a lot more than just Mac and Cheese, Booth.”
He shook his head smiling, “You won’t get an argument from me, Bones. You sure had things
steaming last night!”
She looked down a little embarrassed. The memory of what they shared together had left them both a little in awe of each other.
Booth motioned for her to sit on the bed so they could eat together. She cuddled into him, looking into his eyes. They had a deeper awareness of each other than ever before.
His finger dusted off flour on her nose. “You really get into your cooking.” He was totally enamored with her effort. He bent his head to kiss her nose. She turned towards him, their mouths connected so naturally, they shared a long leisurely, yet passionate kiss.
“Morning,” Booth whispered as they broke apart.
“Morning.” Brennan smiled at him. “So, are you going to have a taste?” She asked eagerly.
“I just did!” He smiled raising his brows.
“I meant the food.” Brennan said smiling.
Booth wanted to keep that smile on her face forever. He took a bite of her eggs, and his expression
changed to one of sincere shock. “This is great!”
“Don’t be so surprised.” She said acting a little put off.
“Bones,” He said as he continued eating.
“Yeah?”
“You better have some too. You are going to need your energy.”
“Oh, do I? What for exactly?” She asked, taking the forkful he fed her.
“Oh you’ll see,” He promised. “It was really sweet of you to do this. But I just want you to know, breakfast could have waited until dinner as far as I’m concerned.”
“Booth,” she said teasing him by moving off the bed a little. “Eat a biscuit.”
“Man can’t live by bread alone, Bones.”
She rolled her eyes “Ok, so what does man need besides bread?” She asked giving in, not at all reluctantly.
He put the unfinished tray on the floor. “Come here, and I’ll show you.”
He spent quite a bit of time filling her in on man’s needs.
X-X-X-X-X-X
“Bones,” he said in a hushed whisper, looking into her glowing face.
“Hmmm....”
“Thanks.”
“For breakfast?”
“That too.” He said giving her a look she couldn’t quite define. She only knew it made her heart fill
with an even deeper longing for him.
She reluctantly pulled herself away, “I’m going to go shower and change.”
Booth watched her leave. “You don’t need to change a thing, Bones.” He said in a loving voice. “You’re perfect just the way you are.” The look on his face turned sad thinking of how much he wished this could last.
A/N: So, what do you guys think? Too fluffy? Any cavities so far? Should I bring angst back? One more chapter this Friday before I go off to my surgery. No chapters for a week after Friday. I also need to start writing again, because my back-up chapters are ending. Tsk tsk tsk. So, comments? Concerns? Let me know what you think. Thanks.