Today's word of the day will be jizz moppers. Just close your eyes and imagine what a Jizz Mopper might look like.

In other news: we were out of milk, cream, half & half and soy milk so I thought it might be a good idea to put yogurt in my coffee this morning.  Please add this to a list of things that didn't seem like a great idea but I tried it ( Read more... )

Brother Bear: So I did one of those 'Map My Runs' things and discovered that I walked and/or danced for 13.6 miles around the city on Tuesday.

I fell apart tonight; it was just something I needed to do. Larkspur was curled up next to me in my bed and picked her head up, looked at me with her big golden eyes and started to purr. It was nice.

Wart update: It looks like the wart colony is close to extinction. We won't put plantar's warts on the endangered species list quite yet because we want them bitches dead, like small pox. For the record, duct tape works best which is a good thing because I was thinking about getting pregnant so that I could fight them breast milk-style!

I bought this in Providence, RI 4 years ago almost to the day for absolutely no reason. But, I've held onto it and decided to give it a whirl to prepare myself for the big move to Maine.

I don't regret that decision at all. Woodard gives a pretty thorough (I think) history of the people, fishing habits and lobster-y things ( Read more... )

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Professor Tom: So what's more affective than handing out condoms at the HIV-clinic? Did you guys think you could offer anything in lieu of condoms?
Emily: The pull-out method.

Last night I had a dream that I was hanging out with this guy who offered to let me snuggle with him in his bed, with or without sex. Since in real life I've gone without any snuggling in almost 3 weeks, I was quick to jump on the dream snuggle-sex train. So this Dream Guy and I hung out but when we got into bed, he said my breath was too awful and ( Read more... )

Andie & Angela: Emily, when you think of college, don't you think of love?
Emily: If by love, you mean repeated rejection, then yes, I would say that's an accurate statement.

Dear World,

I have just discovered this web comic. Please enjoy thoroughly.

Love,
Emily