Numbness After The Storm

[antiqrule1]

I've been staving off depression about being alone on New Years. I suppose it makes me feel like I'm a loser or something to be alone. I feel worthless and unwanted, rejected even. I know I have friends and such, so I have to be loved just a bit. And I realize that the majority of my friends are in relationships, so they aren't about to invite me

Comments

[quinnthevixen]

I'm so sorry I'm not able to do anything exciting with you tonight. Honestly, I would've loved to! But I am already so exhausted from being at shelter all day, with it being very busy and noisy, and I think all I'll do this evening is crawl into bed. I don't even know that I'll drink a sip of champagne or bother staying up until midnight. I'd probably be a real downer to be around anyway, and now Sam is crabby to so he may stay in Denver...this holiday kind of sucks! The only good one I remember having was 2000, because I was only 14, and being in Berlin at the start of 2008. Maybe we should just travel to exotic locations for new year's from now on! With our millions of dollars...a girl can dream. Okay, I'm rambling, but I love you Tash and I'm sorry you're so down; I hope that feeling isn't lasting.

[antiqrule1]

Hey, I just saw this.

Thank you so much for being there for me. I'm glad New Years didn't turn out so badly for either of us. I love you so much-you're so amazing.

I think I've just been down in general and having the stress of Josh and Robin didn't seem to help. Hopefully I find a way to pull myself back up soon. I'm trying, but I'm just so down. I don't even think it's John's being gone that makes me sad. In fact, I don't think he has anything to do with it at all. I think I'm just emotionally exhausted.

Sometime we should travel to an exotic location with our...hundreds of dollars? haha. I need to reclaim the Keys someday, though, so that it's not just John that I remember there. Maybe you could help me. Drinking, Jimmy Buffett, and tropical things.