ok, my purification period is up. If there is a chance of self development I am ready to start, well kind of ready, I can't really do this alone hahahahaha. So, I better work on physical aspects of myself in the meanwhile, I need a new style hahahahaha.

my psyche has split, or rather the division of it into a multitude of alter egos has become evident now. This might sound like i'm crazy but actually this is the natural state in which everybody lives, unity is a self delusion. People like to be pampered and feel almighty and happy with themselves, but reality is that we are in a catrastophic ( Read more... )

once again i'm changing, but this time is because i want to change. I'm decided to mold me into the person I want to be. No more excuses, the time to change has come. seems that i'll be even more lonely, haha. Sometimes I wish there was somebody that would understand me and that would help me to realize what my defects are. Somebody that would be ( Read more... )

I've been thinking a lot of crap lately and this is the result ( Read more... )

I got 2 new books today on the mail, hehe. One is the Gnostic Bible, The Pistis Sophia Unveiled. I've read the first chapter of it and it seems really interesting. The other book is Revolutionary Psychology, I've read the intro and it is also very interesting. I'll be reading the later first, since is shorter, and therefore less heavy to carry in ( Read more... )

Since last night I've had this image in my head. Is a guy. He's asleep and floating in this dark and empty space. Is he the real me?

Today I'm really tired, haha. I woke up tired, and i've been tired all day, hahaha. not cool, but somehow i feel happy. I feel like i'm being hugged, and it feels really good. Is a really warm aura, hehe. I also feel that i'm being watched but it doesn't bother me, is like somebody is watching over me, could it be what is known as a guardian angel ( Read more... )

Ok, some mormon ladies came over and had a talk with me last friday, they left me a copy of the book of mormon and gave me a selection to read, I just read it and ohh well, seems that there's nothing interesting about it. It seems that next time I'll have to tell them that their religion is not for me. Yes, I think they have it wrong. If anybody ( Read more... )

today I feel like I'm dissapearing. I'm shifting, maybe adapting to some change that I'm not aware of. I'm crying, I feel like I've failed. but what part of me failed? what part of me lost? My connection to the world is dissapearing, that's what it is. I haven't failed, quite the opposite, I'm getting closer to be the person I want. But on the ( Read more... )

There was one remarkable event yesterday that kind of made me wonder. On campus, this old dude approached me and said something about being part of a patrol of some sort, I wasn't paying much attention then. he said "there's been a lot of complaints that you're having to much fun." at that point I thought, (huh, me having a lot of fun?) "hahahaha ( Read more... )