Fall Into Me - Part 3
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They were probably on scotch number five and it was moments like this Harvey realized he didn't just like Ray, he loved him. Because it didn't matter that it was close to midnight, he wouldn't have to stand on the street, tipsy as hell and try to hail a cab that would probably smell like a urinal.
Running his thumb across the lip of the glass he sighed, glancing around the apartment that really looked so much like his own it was kind of uncanny. Maybe this was what minimal Harvard style looked like.
"This is when you're supposed to tell me that I'm a crazy idiot for even thinking about doing this," Harvey said, rubbing his forehead as he leaned back in the comfortable chair.
Jonathan shook his head, sitting across from Harvey a small smirk turning up the corners of his mouth. "Oh, and here I thought that you being a crazy idiot was a well-established fact, my friend."
"No, the idea perhaps, but I think you'll have to do far worse for that to apply to yourself, Harvey." He assured his friend simply. "You're not the first man to consider such a thing." He told him, "And men in positions far higher than your own have managed it just fine. Now don't sit here and tell me Harvey Specter of all people has found something he can't accomplish." Jonathan doubted very much there was anything that Harvey couldn't accomplish if he really put his mind to it - you didn't get to that position without the ability to put in the work.
"You need rules, not just for him, but for yourself as well, unless they've gotten much more relaxed about the relationships between Senior Partners and their associates at Pearson Hardman than I remember." He chuckled.
This was why he'd come to see Jonathan, instead of his closest friends. Because he got it, he knew what he was working through and Harvey trusted him. He sipped his drink as he nodded along with what the other man was saying. "If it was just fucking, it would be different, but it's harder to be discrete with this, with Mike Ross who looks like a damn puppy at least half the time," Harvey rolled his eyes at himself.
"You never could resist puppies." Jonathan, could see the way Harvey rolled his eyes, and couldn't help but be amused on his friend's behalf.
Harvey smiled into his glass, nodding slowly; he'd always had a weakness for a lost puppy. But even then it hadn't been anything like this.
"Yeah, I know, rules are going to be what keeps us afloat, Donna's already noticed and Jessica is too smart not to catch on. But as long as she only suspects she doesn't know, it won't matter." Harvey said, thinking out loud. "So the obvious, no touching at work, then I pretty much draw a blank."
Jonathan nodded listening as Harvey spoke, considering this situation his friend was getting himself into. "No touching is probably a decent place to start, though I suspect if this kid is as eager as you say he is you're not going to be able to keep it out of the work place entirely no matter how much you might like to."
"I think it might be good for you both, to find the lines that can and cannot be crossed there, to make a point when you're out of the office to touch and give him that when you can." Harvey was right, this entire situation would be entirely different if fucking was all it involved, but if that was the case the Jonathan doubted very much Harvey would even be considering his associate.
"Damn kid," Harvey said with a sigh, rubbing his creased forehead. "It's just totally ingrained into everything we do and it was so slow to start I didn't even notice what I was doing and now here we are," Harvey knew they'd be okay at work as long as they could control themselves and he'd have to just teach Mike some self-control as well.
"And here we are indeed." Jonathan rubbed a hand over his chin briefly nodding while he considered the situation in which Harvey now found himself.
It was interesting to see Harvey like this, the man who had up to this point never let himself have a more involved relationship - there had always been a reason of course, Harvard first, and then all the hours he put in each week as an associate at Pearson Hardman, and then working his way up the ranks, and the timing, there was always something. And now here he was seemingly taken by surprise by this kid, Jonathan might have to make an exception to their rule of limited visits during the year to meet this boy. "I've no doubt you'll figure something out for the office, or the car."
"I suppose the car could be a safe zone, it's just Ray and well, he's seen a lot more than I'd like to admit," Harvey said with a dark chuckle.
"You haven't started any training with him yet, have you?" Jonathan asked, glancing at Harvey over the rim of his glass.
"No, no. Most I've done is grab his damn hand when he was jiggling around driving me crazy and command eye contact a few times. I've held him, too." Putting his glass down on the table he splashed a little more scotch into it, bracing his elbows on his thighs as he stared into the carpet. "I sent him to Lila a few days ago, setting up a support network before we start anything."
"Perhaps it's time to start training then, you know a few positive or negative reinforcements can do wonders for establishing boundaries at the start." He reminded Harvey. He wasn't surprised to hear that Harvey had sent Mike to see Lila, she was a lovely young woman and would do the boy some good to have a support of his own before things went much further with Harvey. "And how did that go? If you're as enamored of him as you seem to be I'll bet she adored him."
"I've been holding back, waiting for the right time, but now that we've talked and he's met Lila I'm going to start taking things slow, you know the pace I like to work at," Harvey said as he finished the remainder of his drink and set it on the table. "It's times like these I wish we'd never quit smoking," he said, stretching his neck. "Lila? I'm lucky Mike's not Troy's type or she'd probably have talked him into trying to take him off my hands," he said with a grin. "She loved him; he'll put on 15 pounds by the time she's done loving him, too."
Jonathan nodded, but slow was best in this case - for them both perhaps, to allow Mike the time to really understand what he had asked for and Harvey to find a way to navigate that line between professional and personal that still ran between them. "You could always start again, though I suspect you'll find something far more appealing to satisfy that oral fixation of yours before too long." He smirked. And he was entirely unsurprised to hear about Lila, yes he was definitely going to have to make time to meet Mike Ross.
Jonathan helped put Harvey at ease, he was a powerful man, with his own firm and Harvey respected him and his opinion. So for the other man not to tell him he was crazy to do this was endlessly reassuring. "Very funny, I always knew you were a better comedian than you are a lawyer, unfortunate for you, but true."
"Talk to him; make sure he understands, you'll be fine Harvey. I have complete faith in your ability to handle this." Jonathan assured his friend, leaning across the space between them to squeeze Harvey's knee briefly.
Placing his hand over Jonathan's on his knee he gave a slow nod. "I'll be relying on you to give him a job if everything falls apart, my friend," Harvey said, giving his hand a squeeze.
"Don't be so dramatic Harvey, you're supposed to be the realist of the two of us." Jonathan said, but nodded all the same. "It'll be fine, but I'll be more than happy to take him off Pearson Hardman's hands should that become necessary."
Smiling at Jonathan he tipped his glass in his direction. "Just remember, I don't share," he said with a laugh.
"You wound me, Harvey. I know how to keep my hands to myself." Jonathan laughed, balancing his own glass on his knee.
"I should go, I want to go over there before he falls asleep in a giant pile of paperwork," Harvey said, easing himself out of his chair.
Jonathan got to his feet with Harvey. "Bring him by sometime, I can tell him how I knew it would work out from the start." He told Harvey, grinning easily before he nodded in the direction of the door. "Go see your boy."
Harvey led the way to the door, giving Jonathan a quick tight hug when they reached it. "I'll bring him by only to rub it in, my friend," he said with a smile as he pulled away.
"I'll see you in court, I'm sure." Harvey added as he stepped out of the penthouse and headed towards the elevator.
Mike was trying, really he was, but it felt like the more he tried the worse things got. He hadn't expected Jenny that night, when he'd set himself up on the couch with half a cold pizza and a few beers and way too many briefs to go through that night. But she'd shown up at his door all the same, and he hadn't had the heart to just ask her to leave.
That was his first mistake.
The second came when she tried to kiss him, and Mike had startled practically falling onto the floor while Jenny looked at him like he'd lost his mind. She'd asked him what was wrong, and he'd had two choices, he could have come up with some sort of half-truth to tell her, something about Trevor maybe, or he could tell her the truth.
It had started innocently enough, he was involved with someone else, it was all still new and he didn't want to jeopardize it, there were certain expectations, and after that it had devolved into his ridiculous habit of offering dictionary definitions and expecting people to follow along with him in the course of the conversation, like the rest of the world just carried around the dictionary in their heads the way he did.
"Look, Jenny - this, us … it was a bad idea at the start, and it's an even worse idea now. I can't - I'm not just a replacement for Trevor." He told her, shaking his head. "I want you to be happy, I want you to find someone who actually loves you the way you deserve to be loved, but that's not going to be me."
"Will you just - you can stay and we can talk if you want, but we can't do that." He was trying, really he was, she was the one friend he had left, the one person who had seen him at some of the worst points in his life now that Trevor was gone, and losing her all together wasn't something he could even consider.
She really hadn't come here to make a move on him or anything, Jenny was just lonely and miserable and Mike was funny and nice and always made her feel better about things. But it just so happened that when he was making her feel better he was also really cute and she wanted him. They wanted each other, what was wrong with that?
But it turned out Mike didn't want her and then had started talking and hadn't stopped and Jenny had no idea what he was talking about. So he was seeing someone, but that had to be a new things and she just didn't understand the problem, not when they were as close as they were.
"You're not a replacement, Mike," Jenny said, sliding onto the floor to sit beside him. "You could never be just a replacement," she added, reaching out to run her hand slowly over his chest.
"I don't understand, is it that Rachel girl from your work?" Jenny asked, brow furrowed as she tried to move closer to him.
Mike pushed himself back slowly, he didn't want her to get the wrong idea, but her hand on his chest and her so close - all he could think about was Harvey's rule. "No, no, no it's not Rachel." No that, Mike was well aware, was not going anywhere, he and Rachel were far better friends than they ever would have been as anything else, and he wasn't about to damage that relationship trying to make it more - he'd given up on that long before he'd ever considered anything with Harvey.
"Can you stop? The touching I mean, please." Mike asked, because his only other option was walking away from her and he didn't think that would help matters. "You're my friend Jenny, you know that right? I want to keep that. I want to be your friend, but I can't give you anything more than that."
Jenny's forehead creased and she looked down at her knees wondering why all of a sudden Mike would rather do anything but have her near him. "We're friends, yes, but we've always been more than that, Mike, come on," she said, but she kept her hands to herself.
"Just... Who is she? We're friends and you haven't mentioned anyone to me, told me about any dates, how am I supposed to know you've just, gone and found someone else," Jenny said, her words letting on how hurt she was.
They had all always been more than just friends, Mike had always thought about the three of them as something like a family, the dysfunctional sort of support system he needed while his life had fallen apart around him.
He sighed, hearing the hurt in her words - he should have told her, especially with how things had been between them after Trevor left. She should have known, rather than finding out like this. "Not a she." He told her, watching her face while he spoke. "I should have told you, you're right. This is all just really new for me too and I'm still trying to figure it out myself, I didn't want to tell anyone about it when I didn't know exactly what to say."
"It's Harvey." He told her. "There haven't really been any dates, or you know anything really - not yet, but eventually..." Mike shrugged, though dates was not a term he would have applied to Harvey.
Jenny's jaw dropped and she was speechless for at least a minute, looking at Mike like he was insane. "Not a she. You're, you're..." She looked horrified as she stood up, putting the coffee table between them.
"So not only are you fucking gay but you're fucking your boss? Mike, that's just... Pathetic." She said, her arms crossing over her chest. "Are you that insecure? That you let some older guy take advantage of you at work? That's so gross, Mike." Jenny said, wiping her hands on her skirt like she was trying to get the feeling of Mike off them. She knew she was being harsh, but she was hurt and confused and Mike was just... Not the person she'd thought he was.
"Jenny." Mike couldn't stand that look on her face any more than the words she said, each one sharp and cutting. "It's not like that, he's not taking advantage of me, I asked for this." He wanted her to understand, wanted her to be able to see that this was going to be good for him. "Please just, sit okay? We can talk about it - it's okay, I promise." He hadn't thought she'd throw herself at him and be completely happy about this news but the way she'd gotten up so fast, called him pathetic, Mike hadn't been prepared for that and he didn't know how to deal with it now.
Maybe the conversations he'd had with Lila since that night they had met had given him some sort of unrealistic expectations about all of this. He was used to the way Lila seemed to understand him, even when Mike felt like he wasn't making any sense, and he'd felt like maybe some of that would carry over to dealing with others. But looking at Jenny he could see how wrong he'd been. "Please, Jen."
Jenny was flustered, she hated surprises and this was the biggest one of her life. "You asked for it? Damn it Mike, you're smart and talented, you don't need to fuck some creepy old lawyer to get a good job," she said, shaking her head but taking a hesitant step back towards him. Jenny had always loved Mike, thought she'd known everything about him but this just seemed too much.
Taking a deep breath she sat on the arm of the couch, facing him, her bottom lip between her lips so she wouldn't lash out. "Okay, Mikey. Explain, make this seem like it's not the most wrong thing I've ever heard. What would your gran say if she knew you were doing something like that with a guy?" Jenny said, shaking her head and looking down at her knees.
Mike breathed out a sigh of relief that Jenny hadn't just left, she didn't sound like she was going to be convinced but she was still there - and that meant that Mike could try to explain this to her. She could hear his side of it and they could figure it out. He told himself it was going to be okay.
"I'm not doing anything with him yet, Jenny." He told her slowly, he wasn't going to touch the question of Grammy because that was low even if Jenny was upset. "I told you it's only just started, and it's not about my job - I got this job because I'm amazing, because I have the skills to be a great lawyer and Harvey saw that. All of this," He gestured vaguely, sitting down at the opposite end of the couch, because Jenny might still be there with him, but he didn't think she was ready for him to be close just yet, "isn't about that."
And then he thought about how to explain it to her, this inexorable connection he had with Harvey that he had been unable to deny no matter how hard he'd tried. "Harvey understands me Jen," He started. "Better than anyone I've ever known, and he can give me the things I need in a relationship, and I can give him things too and … we just work. This thing between us is right, and I want to be his."
Jenny just couldn't believe what she was hearing. The more Mike explained the more she hated it, the more it made her feel worse and when Mike finished she just looked at him like he'd told her that he wanted to cut off his own hands for the fun of it.
"I should be hurt about the fact you think he understands you better than I do, but you know what? I'm not," Jenny stood up, looking down at Mike with a shrug. "I don't know what has got in to you, but I hate it," she said bitterly, her eyes a little bit watery. "You want to be his? What's wrong with you, Mike? Aren't you supposed to be a man? Because a real man doesn't want to belong to someone," she practically spat, already opening her mouth to begin her next tirade when the front door swung open.
Harvey had heard more than enough from the hall and he made a mental note to remember how thin these walls were. "This is New York, you should know to lock your door," he said, his voice deathly calm but the rage was coming off him in waves as he slowly shut the door behind him. Having just finished his drink with Jonathan this was the last thing he'd been expecting when he turned up at Mike's but it seemed like the perfect time to cut in.
Fixing his eyes on Mike's he gave a little tilt of his head, the come here remaining unsaid but the point remaining.
Harvey's sudden appearance in his apartment was both the best and the worst thing at that moment, because Mike wanted to handle this one his own, he wanted to be able to tell Jenny that she was wrong and show her why, and at the same time seeing Harvey there was the biggest relief.
He was on his feet without really thinking about it at that tilt of Harvey's head, the meaning clear despite the lack of verbal cues. Though somewhere along the path between Harvey and Jenny Mike seemed to realize it wasn't just Harvey in the room with him, and he couldn't help the way his eyes cut to Jenny, his steps faltering just slightly though he didn't stop until he was standing with Harvey.
If Harvey had been angry before it was nothing compared to when Mike took his eyes off him and looked at her. Looked at her like he was seeking the direction only Harvey was ever supposed to provide. But he held it in, he was good at that. His hand settled on the back of Mike's neck, lips pressing momentarily against his temple.
"Ohmygod," Jenny whispered under her breath, looking between them with a mixture of shock and disgust on her face. In fact she felt sick to her stomach after what she'd just seen. "Mike, don't stay here, you can come home with me, it will be alright," she said, looking at Harvey like he was a sex offender, which she was half sure he was.
He just wanted her to understand, to see that this wasn't something that was being forced on him, and it wasn't the offensive thing she seemed to think it was. "Jenny." He shook his head; he didn't know how to make her understand. "It's alright, Jen. I told you, I asked for this." He told her again.
"I want to be here, with Harvey." The longer this went on though, the more Mike thought that maybe it wouldn't work out as easily as he'd hoped it would. Jenny was supposed to be his friend but the way she was looking at him, at the pair of them, didn't fit with that definition. "I'm happy here, Jen. Can't you accept that? This is what makes me happy." He was just this side of pleading with her to see his point, but it was a close thing.
Harvey knew that look and he knew that all of Mike's reasoning wasn't going to accomplish anything he wanted it to. But Harvey was going to let him try and he didn't get between them, even though every reflex told him to, to end this and protect what was his from coming to any harm. He simply let his thumb stroke Mike's neck, fixing Jenny with his coldest glare.
Seeing the couple together made her stomach churn, there was something so wrong in the way that Mike got up and ran to him because he tilted his arrogant head, in the way Harvey touched Mike without any trace of real affection, just what looked like ownership. It was just wrong and that didn't start to cover the fact they were both men. "Mike, you're so fucking naive, you let this hot shot lawyer give you a job and all he wants is your self-respect in return? He's sick and you're-"
But Harvey wasn't letting this continue, he'd heard enough. "Get out," he said, cutting her off in her tirade and ignoring the way she looked to Mike to undermine what he'd just said. "No, I said get out," Harvey said, stepping between the two and towering over Jenny easily.
"You can't tell me what to do, I'm not scared of you. What you're doing is fucked up and I'm sure would cost you your job, I should walk into your office tomorrow and get you fired for what you're doing," Jenny was practically shouting, her cheeks bright red.
Harvey looked down at her for a moment before giving a short, cold laugh. "You are a pathetic child and I don't have time for children." He growled, crossing his arms over his broad chest. "You go into my office tomorrow? I will destroy you. It's that simple. I will find every single mistake you've ever made, every dirty photo you've ever taken, every tiny little comment you've ever made about anyone and I will ruin your life with it." His voice was calm but his eyes were practically burning with freezing fury.
Mike could only stand there and listen to the pair of them, the way Jenny refused to listen and the way Harvey told her to get out, and then the threats. He didn't want Harvey to go after Jenny, because he had no doubt that he could very easily destroy anything good she had in her life and while she might be refusing to be understanding about all of this she was still his friend.
But more than he didn't want Harvey to ruin Jenny, the thought that she might go to their office and tell someone what they were doing made his blood run cold. The idea that she might try to hurt Harvey in all of this made him feel sick.
"Jenny-" He started, stepping to the side, to see around the wall Harvey made standing in front of him. "I think you should go. You don't have to like this, and you don't have to accept it, but you owe me the respect to let me make my own decisions about my life." He told her, without that pleading tone he'd used before, because this wasn't about getting her understanding this was about protecting what was his. "After all we've both had to deal with through Trevor I think you of all people would understand that." He reminded her.
"If you want to talk later, actually talk - not to tell me I'm pathetic and wrong, and not to insult Harvey then you can call me. And if not then maybe this should be it." He told her slowly, he hated to even suggest it, to make this possibly be the last time he saw her, but Mike couldn't let her hurt them, and he couldn't deal with trying to convince her while she refused to listen again and again either. Maybe this was the only way.
Harvey settled when he heard the shift in Mike's tone and he stepped back a little bit, seeing as he now seemed like he was in the right place to take charge of the situation. He had to admit he loved hearing Mike talk about them, so proud and sure, it made him realize they were doing the right thing. This felt right.
Jenny was scared, she couldn't help it, Harvey was intimidating and there was something in his tone that made her realize he wasn't reaching. He really could hurt her and that really made the idea of turning them in seem much less appealing. Looking between the two men she grabbed her handbag off the table and slung it over her shoulder, storming through the small space and past Mike to the door. "I don't want to talk until you've come to your senses," she said with a cold glare. "Don't you tell your gran, it'd fucking kill her," Jenny added before she threw the door open and stormed down the hall.
Hearing Jenny mention Mike's gran made something in Harvey snap and he turned sharply, ready to follow her down the hallway and shake her until she took it back.
Just when Mike thought maybe he could relax, though how he would ever relax again after that he wasn't sure, Harvey was turning toward the door - like he was going to follow after Jenny. And Mike knew that would only end badly, he moved put himself between the open door and Harvey, hands up in front of him pressed against Harvey's chest, and kicking out to catch the door with a foot and do his best to close it without moving away from Harvey. "Don't - please don't." He didn't know what Harvey had planned to do, but Mike knew he needed to keep him there.
"Stay here, please, stay with me." He let himself lean into Harvey, pressing his forehead against Harvey's shoulder, letting himself have just a moment there. Just a moment to breathe again, and push past that heavy painful feeling that had settled in him from that first look of disgust Jenny had given him.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry for - all of that. I shouldn't have told her anything." And he really did have no one to blame but himself, he could have found something else to tell her, but he hadn't wanted to lie to her, he'd stupidly wanted her to be happy for him, he wanted someone who was his friend first to know about this.
Harvey was so focused on Jenny that he was almost surprised when Mike stepped in front of him, making his reassess what he'd been intent on doing. He'd been about to tell Mike never to tell him what to do, but he couldn't, not with him pleading with him like that. Harvey hesitated for another moment before placing one hand in Mike's hair and the other in between his shoulder blades and pulling him in.
"Don't be sorry," Harvey said softly, letting out a long sigh. "You were just trying to talk to a friend, it's not your fault," he whispered, lips pressing against Mike's hairline. "Do I have to ask?" Harvey said, unable to continue on without knowing if Mike had broken their rule here with Jenny.
Mike just let himself lean into Harvey when he was pulled closer, that feeling of Harvey's hands on him again helping to make things right again, despite the way he could feel his heart beating just a bit too fast, and breathing just a little faster than normal. He wanted to stay there for the rest of the night, but Harvey's question made it impossible for him.
He lifted his face, he could have spoken into Harvey's shirt, muffled the answer putting off what would be inevitable disappointment just a little longer. "She tried to kiss me," He told Harvey. "It's what started all of this."
Harvey's chest burned and he really wanted to go after Jenny again, but this time in a way that was going to involve much more than a shaking. "The rule was that you don't touch and if someone touches you then I'll deal with them, it's not your fault she tried to kiss you," Harvey said gently, placing both hands on Mike's arms and holding him still while he stepped away.
Shrugging off his jacket he hung it over the back of the couch before he made himself comfortable. "Come here, boy," he said quietly, glancing down at his lap before he looked back at Mike.
If it hadn't been for the hands stopping him Mike would have ended following Harvey, no doubt. But he'd waited, standing where Harvey left him until he called for him again. After that conversation (though conversation was not the right word at all) with Jenny, Mike needed to be close to Harvey, he needed the reassurance of Harvey beside him and touching him again. He still felt wound tight, nerves and frustration and hurt feelings still whirling around in his veins
He moved easily though, despite the conflicting emotions warring inside of him and interpreted that look at Harvey's lap to mean that was where he should sit, and given how he was feeling Mike didn't need any further excuse for that.
Mike was a natural, Harvey actually couldn't believe how much of one sometimes. They were just perfectly in tune and all it took was a look or a few words or a glance to get Mike where he wanted him. Mike's training really had already started despite what he'd told Jonathan.
With his boy settled in his lap he was finally able to relax, even if his heart was still beating a little too fast in his chest and not because of how good this felt. Harvey sighed, wrapping his arms loosely around Mike as he looked into his eyes. "You are doing so well, Mike, just so damn good," he said quietly, giving him a little smile. "I'm so proud of you for standing up for yourself, for saying no to her," Harvey continued, squeezing the back of Mike's neck.
As good as it felt to hear Harvey tell him he was good, that Harvey was proud of him, this didn't feel like a victory to him. Not like the sort of win that came from knowing he'd found the right loop hole, the one mistake in fifteen hundred pages of bylaws, or the bit of information that could help their clients, or help Harvey achieve his goals. This was Jenny, this was his friend and she was just gone.
"She wouldn't even listen." Mike said after a moment, when it felt like he wasn't going to fall apart over this. "We've been friends for years, and she wouldn't even listen." She'd rather leave than let him be happy with this, just like everyone else had done. After Trevor she was his oldest friend and it felt like that was slipping away from him too. This, what he had with Harvey, even if they were still just barely scratching the surface was too much a part of what Mike was and what he wanted to let her try and take that from him, but it hadn't made it any easier to tell her to leave.
It was really hard for Harvey for his reassurance not to be enough, not that he was expecting it would be, but it made him feel useless and Harvey Specter wasn't good at feeling helpless in any situation. He just wanted to shield Mike from everything, he knew he couldn't but it felt like his responsibility to stop anything from touching him or upsetting him like this.
"I know, kid," Harvey said softly, letting his head drop back so he was looking at the ceiling. "She's naive and immature, Mike." He said as he stroked his hand softly up and down his boy's back.
Looking up he considered Mike's face for a moment before he cleared his throat. "Would you like me to go?" Harvey asked softly, withdrawing his hands from where they were settled on Mike. "Just because you agreed to this doesn't mean we can't stop, whenever you want."
Mike was tense, but Harvey's hand on his back helped, too much had happened tonight, too much had happened recently and he was still trying to figure out how it all worked. Adding this mess with Jenny only reminded Mike that things were changing, and while they were changes he wanted - changes that felt right, it was moving him further and further away from the life he'd had before he'd met Harvey.
"No." Mike said quickly, all his attention snapping back to Harvey and the present, "Don't go." He would have to eventually, but not yet, Mike wasn't ready for that. Not when it all felt just a little too tender still. "I don't want to stop, I tried to tell Jenny that - this, you, what we could do all of this feels right, for the first time things feel like they're supposed to. I don't want to stop."
Harvey nodded slowly, wrapping his arms around Mike and pulling him down into his chest in hopes that he'd relax. "Okay," he said softly, giving a big sigh. "I don't want to stop either, Mike. In fact, I want to start. I've been drinking and you're not in the headspace right now, but I thought I could stay the night and tomorrow we could start fresh," Harvey said, his fingers slowly trailing up and down Mike's spine.
Mike felt like he could breathe just a bit more easily when Harvey told him he didn't want to stop either - Mike wasn't sure he'd have been able to stand it if he had. But Harvey didn't want to stop, he wanted to start, and that made something inside of Mike twist eagerly - even if tonight wasn't the right night for it.
"You want to stay the night?" He asked slowly, pausing over the very idea. "You want to stay the night here?" Because it was strange enough having Harvey in his home, but Harvey staying too - it was threatening to break some part of his brain as he tried to wrap his mind around it.
Harvey laughed, looking into Mike's eyes either a lingering smile. "I want to stay the night, is that so hard to believe? It's late and I don't want to bundle you off to my place and bother Ray again. Plus this is your comfort zone and if we're going to start anything tomorrow, it should be here," Harvey explained, rubbing his thumb over a tense muscle in Mike's shoulder. "Would you rather I didn't?"
Okay, so Harvey had a point and the idea was less completely baffling than it had been a moment before. The idea of it was still a little strange but he could see the reasoning behind it, rather than just some random thought with no explanation behind it. "No, I want you to stay, I just-" He exhaled, and shrugged curling his fingers against the back of his own neck rubbing slowly. "It's not something I'd ever considered before, is all." It made all of this much more real than it had been before too, it wasn't just a conversation to be continued at a later date - or a lingering glance at the office, this was Harvey in his personal and private space and Mike definitely wanted that.
"Nothing is going to happen tonight," Harvey assured him, sliding his fingers under Mike's chin to angle his head up. "Just sleep, together hopefully, although I'm not totally opposed to the couch," he said gently. Even when he was upset, Mike was still alluring and Harvey wanted a way to make him feel better and a way to show him how much he cared and it was really long overdue.
Leaning in Harvey kissed him gently, lips seeming to slot together perfectly as Harvey pulled Mike to him.
Mike went easily when Harvey pulled him closer. He hadn't expected the kiss, not when Harvey had told him nothing was going to happen, having Harvey there made him want something to happen, he was more than content simply having Harvey there - touching him.
It was a simple thing to be kissed by Harvey and let him be the one to control it, so many times in his life Mike had been overeager, and pressed for more too quickly, but here - this was so new that Mike could only let himself be kissed. And it helped; it made him relax, like he was melting into Harvey and forgetting about everything else that had happened during the day and evening before this moment.
Breathing just a little faster when Harvey did pull away, Mike licked his lips, still leaning into Harvey. "I don't want you to sleep on the couch." He told him quietly as he had to almost physically stop himself from initiating another kiss, dropping his forehead to Harvey's shoulder, hiding his face against the side of his neck and breathing in that scent that was purely Harvey.
It felt amazing to kiss Mike, even just for a few moments, having his lap full of the boy he wanted and feeling that delicious tension between them slowly start to magnify and get more and more intense. Harvey knew by the time he gave Mike exactly what he wanted the boy would be half crazy with want and that was just how he wanted it.
"Then let's go to bed, have you got something I can wear that is going to fit someone who's got a larger build than a fourteen year old?" Harvey asked, chuckling softly and burying his fingers in Mike's hair.
"You're so hilarious." Mike said, despite his words his tone was affectionate, torn between pressing into the fingers in his hair and the warmth of Harvey's neck. "Seriously, you should consider a career change, the best comedian in the city."
He felt better, just having Harvey there, and though things had spiraled out of control with Jenny after Harvey arrived Mike couldn't help but be glad that Harvey had come all the same.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Master Post
They were probably on scotch number five and it was moments like this Harvey realized he didn't just like Ray, he loved him. Because it didn't matter that it was close to midnight, he wouldn't have to stand on the street, tipsy as hell and try to hail a cab that would probably smell like a urinal.
Running his thumb across the lip of the glass he sighed, glancing around the apartment that really looked so much like his own it was kind of uncanny. Maybe this was what minimal Harvard style looked like.
"This is when you're supposed to tell me that I'm a crazy idiot for even thinking about doing this," Harvey said, rubbing his forehead as he leaned back in the comfortable chair.
Jonathan shook his head, sitting across from Harvey a small smirk turning up the corners of his mouth. "Oh, and here I thought that you being a crazy idiot was a well-established fact, my friend."
"No, the idea perhaps, but I think you'll have to do far worse for that to apply to yourself, Harvey." He assured his friend simply. "You're not the first man to consider such a thing." He told him, "And men in positions far higher than your own have managed it just fine. Now don't sit here and tell me Harvey Specter of all people has found something he can't accomplish." Jonathan doubted very much there was anything that Harvey couldn't accomplish if he really put his mind to it - you didn't get to that position without the ability to put in the work.
"You need rules, not just for him, but for yourself as well, unless they've gotten much more relaxed about the relationships between Senior Partners and their associates at Pearson Hardman than I remember." He chuckled.
This was why he'd come to see Jonathan, instead of his closest friends. Because he got it, he knew what he was working through and Harvey trusted him. He sipped his drink as he nodded along with what the other man was saying. "If it was just fucking, it would be different, but it's harder to be discrete with this, with Mike Ross who looks like a damn puppy at least half the time," Harvey rolled his eyes at himself.
"You never could resist puppies." Jonathan, could see the way Harvey rolled his eyes, and couldn't help but be amused on his friend's behalf.
Harvey smiled into his glass, nodding slowly; he'd always had a weakness for a lost puppy. But even then it hadn't been anything like this.
"Yeah, I know, rules are going to be what keeps us afloat, Donna's already noticed and Jessica is too smart not to catch on. But as long as she only suspects she doesn't know, it won't matter." Harvey said, thinking out loud. "So the obvious, no touching at work, then I pretty much draw a blank."
Jonathan nodded listening as Harvey spoke, considering this situation his friend was getting himself into. "No touching is probably a decent place to start, though I suspect if this kid is as eager as you say he is you're not going to be able to keep it out of the work place entirely no matter how much you might like to."
"I think it might be good for you both, to find the lines that can and cannot be crossed there, to make a point when you're out of the office to touch and give him that when you can." Harvey was right, this entire situation would be entirely different if fucking was all it involved, but if that was the case the Jonathan doubted very much Harvey would even be considering his associate.
"Damn kid," Harvey said with a sigh, rubbing his creased forehead. "It's just totally ingrained into everything we do and it was so slow to start I didn't even notice what I was doing and now here we are," Harvey knew they'd be okay at work as long as they could control themselves and he'd have to just teach Mike some self-control as well.
"And here we are indeed." Jonathan rubbed a hand over his chin briefly nodding while he considered the situation in which Harvey now found himself.
It was interesting to see Harvey like this, the man who had up to this point never let himself have a more involved relationship - there had always been a reason of course, Harvard first, and then all the hours he put in each week as an associate at Pearson Hardman, and then working his way up the ranks, and the timing, there was always something. And now here he was seemingly taken by surprise by this kid, Jonathan might have to make an exception to their rule of limited visits during the year to meet this boy. "I've no doubt you'll figure something out for the office, or the car."
"I suppose the car could be a safe zone, it's just Ray and well, he's seen a lot more than I'd like to admit," Harvey said with a dark chuckle.
"You haven't started any training with him yet, have you?" Jonathan asked, glancing at Harvey over the rim of his glass.
"No, no. Most I've done is grab his damn hand when he was jiggling around driving me crazy and command eye contact a few times. I've held him, too." Putting his glass down on the table he splashed a little more scotch into it, bracing his elbows on his thighs as he stared into the carpet. "I sent him to Lila a few days ago, setting up a support network before we start anything."
"Perhaps it's time to start training then, you know a few positive or negative reinforcements can do wonders for establishing boundaries at the start." He reminded Harvey. He wasn't surprised to hear that Harvey had sent Mike to see Lila, she was a lovely young woman and would do the boy some good to have a support of his own before things went much further with Harvey. "And how did that go? If you're as enamored of him as you seem to be I'll bet she adored him."
"I've been holding back, waiting for the right time, but now that we've talked and he's met Lila I'm going to start taking things slow, you know the pace I like to work at," Harvey said as he finished the remainder of his drink and set it on the table. "It's times like these I wish we'd never quit smoking," he said, stretching his neck. "Lila? I'm lucky Mike's not Troy's type or she'd probably have talked him into trying to take him off my hands," he said with a grin. "She loved him; he'll put on 15 pounds by the time she's done loving him, too."
Jonathan nodded, but slow was best in this case - for them both perhaps, to allow Mike the time to really understand what he had asked for and Harvey to find a way to navigate that line between professional and personal that still ran between them. "You could always start again, though I suspect you'll find something far more appealing to satisfy that oral fixation of yours before too long." He smirked. And he was entirely unsurprised to hear about Lila, yes he was definitely going to have to make time to meet Mike Ross.
Jonathan helped put Harvey at ease, he was a powerful man, with his own firm and Harvey respected him and his opinion. So for the other man not to tell him he was crazy to do this was endlessly reassuring. "Very funny, I always knew you were a better comedian than you are a lawyer, unfortunate for you, but true."
"Talk to him; make sure he understands, you'll be fine Harvey. I have complete faith in your ability to handle this." Jonathan assured his friend, leaning across the space between them to squeeze Harvey's knee briefly.
Placing his hand over Jonathan's on his knee he gave a slow nod. "I'll be relying on you to give him a job if everything falls apart, my friend," Harvey said, giving his hand a squeeze.
"Don't be so dramatic Harvey, you're supposed to be the realist of the two of us." Jonathan said, but nodded all the same. "It'll be fine, but I'll be more than happy to take him off Pearson Hardman's hands should that become necessary."
Smiling at Jonathan he tipped his glass in his direction. "Just remember, I don't share," he said with a laugh.
"You wound me, Harvey. I know how to keep my hands to myself." Jonathan laughed, balancing his own glass on his knee.
"I should go, I want to go over there before he falls asleep in a giant pile of paperwork," Harvey said, easing himself out of his chair.
Jonathan got to his feet with Harvey. "Bring him by sometime, I can tell him how I knew it would work out from the start." He told Harvey, grinning easily before he nodded in the direction of the door. "Go see your boy."
Harvey led the way to the door, giving Jonathan a quick tight hug when they reached it. "I'll bring him by only to rub it in, my friend," he said with a smile as he pulled away.
"I'll see you in court, I'm sure." Harvey added as he stepped out of the penthouse and headed towards the elevator.
Mike was trying, really he was, but it felt like the more he tried the worse things got. He hadn't expected Jenny that night, when he'd set himself up on the couch with half a cold pizza and a few beers and way too many briefs to go through that night. But she'd shown up at his door all the same, and he hadn't had the heart to just ask her to leave.
That was his first mistake.
The second came when she tried to kiss him, and Mike had startled practically falling onto the floor while Jenny looked at him like he'd lost his mind. She'd asked him what was wrong, and he'd had two choices, he could have come up with some sort of half-truth to tell her, something about Trevor maybe, or he could tell her the truth.
It had started innocently enough, he was involved with someone else, it was all still new and he didn't want to jeopardize it, there were certain expectations, and after that it had devolved into his ridiculous habit of offering dictionary definitions and expecting people to follow along with him in the course of the conversation, like the rest of the world just carried around the dictionary in their heads the way he did.
"Look, Jenny - this, us … it was a bad idea at the start, and it's an even worse idea now. I can't - I'm not just a replacement for Trevor." He told her, shaking his head. "I want you to be happy, I want you to find someone who actually loves you the way you deserve to be loved, but that's not going to be me."
"Will you just - you can stay and we can talk if you want, but we can't do that." He was trying, really he was, she was the one friend he had left, the one person who had seen him at some of the worst points in his life now that Trevor was gone, and losing her all together wasn't something he could even consider.
She really hadn't come here to make a move on him or anything, Jenny was just lonely and miserable and Mike was funny and nice and always made her feel better about things. But it just so happened that when he was making her feel better he was also really cute and she wanted him. They wanted each other, what was wrong with that?
But it turned out Mike didn't want her and then had started talking and hadn't stopped and Jenny had no idea what he was talking about. So he was seeing someone, but that had to be a new things and she just didn't understand the problem, not when they were as close as they were.
"You're not a replacement, Mike," Jenny said, sliding onto the floor to sit beside him. "You could never be just a replacement," she added, reaching out to run her hand slowly over his chest.
"I don't understand, is it that Rachel girl from your work?" Jenny asked, brow furrowed as she tried to move closer to him.
Mike pushed himself back slowly, he didn't want her to get the wrong idea, but her hand on his chest and her so close - all he could think about was Harvey's rule. "No, no, no it's not Rachel." No that, Mike was well aware, was not going anywhere, he and Rachel were far better friends than they ever would have been as anything else, and he wasn't about to damage that relationship trying to make it more - he'd given up on that long before he'd ever considered anything with Harvey.
"Can you stop? The touching I mean, please." Mike asked, because his only other option was walking away from her and he didn't think that would help matters. "You're my friend Jenny, you know that right? I want to keep that. I want to be your friend, but I can't give you anything more than that."
Jenny's forehead creased and she looked down at her knees wondering why all of a sudden Mike would rather do anything but have her near him. "We're friends, yes, but we've always been more than that, Mike, come on," she said, but she kept her hands to herself.
"Just... Who is she? We're friends and you haven't mentioned anyone to me, told me about any dates, how am I supposed to know you've just, gone and found someone else," Jenny said, her words letting on how hurt she was.
They had all always been more than just friends, Mike had always thought about the three of them as something like a family, the dysfunctional sort of support system he needed while his life had fallen apart around him.
He sighed, hearing the hurt in her words - he should have told her, especially with how things had been between them after Trevor left. She should have known, rather than finding out like this. "Not a she." He told her, watching her face while he spoke. "I should have told you, you're right. This is all just really new for me too and I'm still trying to figure it out myself, I didn't want to tell anyone about it when I didn't know exactly what to say."
"It's Harvey." He told her. "There haven't really been any dates, or you know anything really - not yet, but eventually..." Mike shrugged, though dates was not a term he would have applied to Harvey.
Jenny's jaw dropped and she was speechless for at least a minute, looking at Mike like he was insane. "Not a she. You're, you're..." She looked horrified as she stood up, putting the coffee table between them.
"So not only are you fucking gay but you're fucking your boss? Mike, that's just... Pathetic." She said, her arms crossing over her chest. "Are you that insecure? That you let some older guy take advantage of you at work? That's so gross, Mike." Jenny said, wiping her hands on her skirt like she was trying to get the feeling of Mike off them. She knew she was being harsh, but she was hurt and confused and Mike was just... Not the person she'd thought he was.
"Jenny." Mike couldn't stand that look on her face any more than the words she said, each one sharp and cutting. "It's not like that, he's not taking advantage of me, I asked for this." He wanted her to understand, wanted her to be able to see that this was going to be good for him. "Please just, sit okay? We can talk about it - it's okay, I promise." He hadn't thought she'd throw herself at him and be completely happy about this news but the way she'd gotten up so fast, called him pathetic, Mike hadn't been prepared for that and he didn't know how to deal with it now.
Maybe the conversations he'd had with Lila since that night they had met had given him some sort of unrealistic expectations about all of this. He was used to the way Lila seemed to understand him, even when Mike felt like he wasn't making any sense, and he'd felt like maybe some of that would carry over to dealing with others. But looking at Jenny he could see how wrong he'd been. "Please, Jen."
Jenny was flustered, she hated surprises and this was the biggest one of her life. "You asked for it? Damn it Mike, you're smart and talented, you don't need to fuck some creepy old lawyer to get a good job," she said, shaking her head but taking a hesitant step back towards him. Jenny had always loved Mike, thought she'd known everything about him but this just seemed too much.
Taking a deep breath she sat on the arm of the couch, facing him, her bottom lip between her lips so she wouldn't lash out. "Okay, Mikey. Explain, make this seem like it's not the most wrong thing I've ever heard. What would your gran say if she knew you were doing something like that with a guy?" Jenny said, shaking her head and looking down at her knees.
Mike breathed out a sigh of relief that Jenny hadn't just left, she didn't sound like she was going to be convinced but she was still there - and that meant that Mike could try to explain this to her. She could hear his side of it and they could figure it out. He told himself it was going to be okay.
"I'm not doing anything with him yet, Jenny." He told her slowly, he wasn't going to touch the question of Grammy because that was low even if Jenny was upset. "I told you it's only just started, and it's not about my job - I got this job because I'm amazing, because I have the skills to be a great lawyer and Harvey saw that. All of this," He gestured vaguely, sitting down at the opposite end of the couch, because Jenny might still be there with him, but he didn't think she was ready for him to be close just yet, "isn't about that."
And then he thought about how to explain it to her, this inexorable connection he had with Harvey that he had been unable to deny no matter how hard he'd tried. "Harvey understands me Jen," He started. "Better than anyone I've ever known, and he can give me the things I need in a relationship, and I can give him things too and … we just work. This thing between us is right, and I want to be his."
Jenny just couldn't believe what she was hearing. The more Mike explained the more she hated it, the more it made her feel worse and when Mike finished she just looked at him like he'd told her that he wanted to cut off his own hands for the fun of it.
"I should be hurt about the fact you think he understands you better than I do, but you know what? I'm not," Jenny stood up, looking down at Mike with a shrug. "I don't know what has got in to you, but I hate it," she said bitterly, her eyes a little bit watery. "You want to be his? What's wrong with you, Mike? Aren't you supposed to be a man? Because a real man doesn't want to belong to someone," she practically spat, already opening her mouth to begin her next tirade when the front door swung open.
Harvey had heard more than enough from the hall and he made a mental note to remember how thin these walls were. "This is New York, you should know to lock your door," he said, his voice deathly calm but the rage was coming off him in waves as he slowly shut the door behind him. Having just finished his drink with Jonathan this was the last thing he'd been expecting when he turned up at Mike's but it seemed like the perfect time to cut in.
Fixing his eyes on Mike's he gave a little tilt of his head, the come here remaining unsaid but the point remaining.
Harvey's sudden appearance in his apartment was both the best and the worst thing at that moment, because Mike wanted to handle this one his own, he wanted to be able to tell Jenny that she was wrong and show her why, and at the same time seeing Harvey there was the biggest relief.
He was on his feet without really thinking about it at that tilt of Harvey's head, the meaning clear despite the lack of verbal cues. Though somewhere along the path between Harvey and Jenny Mike seemed to realize it wasn't just Harvey in the room with him, and he couldn't help the way his eyes cut to Jenny, his steps faltering just slightly though he didn't stop until he was standing with Harvey.
If Harvey had been angry before it was nothing compared to when Mike took his eyes off him and looked at her. Looked at her like he was seeking the direction only Harvey was ever supposed to provide. But he held it in, he was good at that. His hand settled on the back of Mike's neck, lips pressing momentarily against his temple.
"Ohmygod," Jenny whispered under her breath, looking between them with a mixture of shock and disgust on her face. In fact she felt sick to her stomach after what she'd just seen. "Mike, don't stay here, you can come home with me, it will be alright," she said, looking at Harvey like he was a sex offender, which she was half sure he was.
He just wanted her to understand, to see that this wasn't something that was being forced on him, and it wasn't the offensive thing she seemed to think it was. "Jenny." He shook his head; he didn't know how to make her understand. "It's alright, Jen. I told you, I asked for this." He told her again.
"I want to be here, with Harvey." The longer this went on though, the more Mike thought that maybe it wouldn't work out as easily as he'd hoped it would. Jenny was supposed to be his friend but the way she was looking at him, at the pair of them, didn't fit with that definition. "I'm happy here, Jen. Can't you accept that? This is what makes me happy." He was just this side of pleading with her to see his point, but it was a close thing.
Harvey knew that look and he knew that all of Mike's reasoning wasn't going to accomplish anything he wanted it to. But Harvey was going to let him try and he didn't get between them, even though every reflex told him to, to end this and protect what was his from coming to any harm. He simply let his thumb stroke Mike's neck, fixing Jenny with his coldest glare.
Seeing the couple together made her stomach churn, there was something so wrong in the way that Mike got up and ran to him because he tilted his arrogant head, in the way Harvey touched Mike without any trace of real affection, just what looked like ownership. It was just wrong and that didn't start to cover the fact they were both men. "Mike, you're so fucking naive, you let this hot shot lawyer give you a job and all he wants is your self-respect in return? He's sick and you're-"
But Harvey wasn't letting this continue, he'd heard enough. "Get out," he said, cutting her off in her tirade and ignoring the way she looked to Mike to undermine what he'd just said. "No, I said get out," Harvey said, stepping between the two and towering over Jenny easily.
"You can't tell me what to do, I'm not scared of you. What you're doing is fucked up and I'm sure would cost you your job, I should walk into your office tomorrow and get you fired for what you're doing," Jenny was practically shouting, her cheeks bright red.
Harvey looked down at her for a moment before giving a short, cold laugh. "You are a pathetic child and I don't have time for children." He growled, crossing his arms over his broad chest. "You go into my office tomorrow? I will destroy you. It's that simple. I will find every single mistake you've ever made, every dirty photo you've ever taken, every tiny little comment you've ever made about anyone and I will ruin your life with it." His voice was calm but his eyes were practically burning with freezing fury.
Mike could only stand there and listen to the pair of them, the way Jenny refused to listen and the way Harvey told her to get out, and then the threats. He didn't want Harvey to go after Jenny, because he had no doubt that he could very easily destroy anything good she had in her life and while she might be refusing to be understanding about all of this she was still his friend.
But more than he didn't want Harvey to ruin Jenny, the thought that she might go to their office and tell someone what they were doing made his blood run cold. The idea that she might try to hurt Harvey in all of this made him feel sick.
"Jenny-" He started, stepping to the side, to see around the wall Harvey made standing in front of him. "I think you should go. You don't have to like this, and you don't have to accept it, but you owe me the respect to let me make my own decisions about my life." He told her, without that pleading tone he'd used before, because this wasn't about getting her understanding this was about protecting what was his. "After all we've both had to deal with through Trevor I think you of all people would understand that." He reminded her.
"If you want to talk later, actually talk - not to tell me I'm pathetic and wrong, and not to insult Harvey then you can call me. And if not then maybe this should be it." He told her slowly, he hated to even suggest it, to make this possibly be the last time he saw her, but Mike couldn't let her hurt them, and he couldn't deal with trying to convince her while she refused to listen again and again either. Maybe this was the only way.
Harvey settled when he heard the shift in Mike's tone and he stepped back a little bit, seeing as he now seemed like he was in the right place to take charge of the situation. He had to admit he loved hearing Mike talk about them, so proud and sure, it made him realize they were doing the right thing. This felt right.
Jenny was scared, she couldn't help it, Harvey was intimidating and there was something in his tone that made her realize he wasn't reaching. He really could hurt her and that really made the idea of turning them in seem much less appealing. Looking between the two men she grabbed her handbag off the table and slung it over her shoulder, storming through the small space and past Mike to the door. "I don't want to talk until you've come to your senses," she said with a cold glare. "Don't you tell your gran, it'd fucking kill her," Jenny added before she threw the door open and stormed down the hall.
Hearing Jenny mention Mike's gran made something in Harvey snap and he turned sharply, ready to follow her down the hallway and shake her until she took it back.
Just when Mike thought maybe he could relax, though how he would ever relax again after that he wasn't sure, Harvey was turning toward the door - like he was going to follow after Jenny. And Mike knew that would only end badly, he moved put himself between the open door and Harvey, hands up in front of him pressed against Harvey's chest, and kicking out to catch the door with a foot and do his best to close it without moving away from Harvey. "Don't - please don't." He didn't know what Harvey had planned to do, but Mike knew he needed to keep him there.
"Stay here, please, stay with me." He let himself lean into Harvey, pressing his forehead against Harvey's shoulder, letting himself have just a moment there. Just a moment to breathe again, and push past that heavy painful feeling that had settled in him from that first look of disgust Jenny had given him.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry for - all of that. I shouldn't have told her anything." And he really did have no one to blame but himself, he could have found something else to tell her, but he hadn't wanted to lie to her, he'd stupidly wanted her to be happy for him, he wanted someone who was his friend first to know about this.
Harvey was so focused on Jenny that he was almost surprised when Mike stepped in front of him, making his reassess what he'd been intent on doing. He'd been about to tell Mike never to tell him what to do, but he couldn't, not with him pleading with him like that. Harvey hesitated for another moment before placing one hand in Mike's hair and the other in between his shoulder blades and pulling him in.
"Don't be sorry," Harvey said softly, letting out a long sigh. "You were just trying to talk to a friend, it's not your fault," he whispered, lips pressing against Mike's hairline. "Do I have to ask?" Harvey said, unable to continue on without knowing if Mike had broken their rule here with Jenny.
Mike just let himself lean into Harvey when he was pulled closer, that feeling of Harvey's hands on him again helping to make things right again, despite the way he could feel his heart beating just a bit too fast, and breathing just a little faster than normal. He wanted to stay there for the rest of the night, but Harvey's question made it impossible for him.
He lifted his face, he could have spoken into Harvey's shirt, muffled the answer putting off what would be inevitable disappointment just a little longer. "She tried to kiss me," He told Harvey. "It's what started all of this."
Harvey's chest burned and he really wanted to go after Jenny again, but this time in a way that was going to involve much more than a shaking. "The rule was that you don't touch and if someone touches you then I'll deal with them, it's not your fault she tried to kiss you," Harvey said gently, placing both hands on Mike's arms and holding him still while he stepped away.
Shrugging off his jacket he hung it over the back of the couch before he made himself comfortable. "Come here, boy," he said quietly, glancing down at his lap before he looked back at Mike.
If it hadn't been for the hands stopping him Mike would have ended following Harvey, no doubt. But he'd waited, standing where Harvey left him until he called for him again. After that conversation (though conversation was not the right word at all) with Jenny, Mike needed to be close to Harvey, he needed the reassurance of Harvey beside him and touching him again. He still felt wound tight, nerves and frustration and hurt feelings still whirling around in his veins
He moved easily though, despite the conflicting emotions warring inside of him and interpreted that look at Harvey's lap to mean that was where he should sit, and given how he was feeling Mike didn't need any further excuse for that.
Mike was a natural, Harvey actually couldn't believe how much of one sometimes. They were just perfectly in tune and all it took was a look or a few words or a glance to get Mike where he wanted him. Mike's training really had already started despite what he'd told Jonathan.
With his boy settled in his lap he was finally able to relax, even if his heart was still beating a little too fast in his chest and not because of how good this felt. Harvey sighed, wrapping his arms loosely around Mike as he looked into his eyes. "You are doing so well, Mike, just so damn good," he said quietly, giving him a little smile. "I'm so proud of you for standing up for yourself, for saying no to her," Harvey continued, squeezing the back of Mike's neck.
As good as it felt to hear Harvey tell him he was good, that Harvey was proud of him, this didn't feel like a victory to him. Not like the sort of win that came from knowing he'd found the right loop hole, the one mistake in fifteen hundred pages of bylaws, or the bit of information that could help their clients, or help Harvey achieve his goals. This was Jenny, this was his friend and she was just gone.
"She wouldn't even listen." Mike said after a moment, when it felt like he wasn't going to fall apart over this. "We've been friends for years, and she wouldn't even listen." She'd rather leave than let him be happy with this, just like everyone else had done. After Trevor she was his oldest friend and it felt like that was slipping away from him too. This, what he had with Harvey, even if they were still just barely scratching the surface was too much a part of what Mike was and what he wanted to let her try and take that from him, but it hadn't made it any easier to tell her to leave.
It was really hard for Harvey for his reassurance not to be enough, not that he was expecting it would be, but it made him feel useless and Harvey Specter wasn't good at feeling helpless in any situation. He just wanted to shield Mike from everything, he knew he couldn't but it felt like his responsibility to stop anything from touching him or upsetting him like this.
"I know, kid," Harvey said softly, letting his head drop back so he was looking at the ceiling. "She's naive and immature, Mike." He said as he stroked his hand softly up and down his boy's back.
Looking up he considered Mike's face for a moment before he cleared his throat. "Would you like me to go?" Harvey asked softly, withdrawing his hands from where they were settled on Mike. "Just because you agreed to this doesn't mean we can't stop, whenever you want."
Mike was tense, but Harvey's hand on his back helped, too much had happened tonight, too much had happened recently and he was still trying to figure out how it all worked. Adding this mess with Jenny only reminded Mike that things were changing, and while they were changes he wanted - changes that felt right, it was moving him further and further away from the life he'd had before he'd met Harvey.
"No." Mike said quickly, all his attention snapping back to Harvey and the present, "Don't go." He would have to eventually, but not yet, Mike wasn't ready for that. Not when it all felt just a little too tender still. "I don't want to stop, I tried to tell Jenny that - this, you, what we could do all of this feels right, for the first time things feel like they're supposed to. I don't want to stop."
Harvey nodded slowly, wrapping his arms around Mike and pulling him down into his chest in hopes that he'd relax. "Okay," he said softly, giving a big sigh. "I don't want to stop either, Mike. In fact, I want to start. I've been drinking and you're not in the headspace right now, but I thought I could stay the night and tomorrow we could start fresh," Harvey said, his fingers slowly trailing up and down Mike's spine.
Mike felt like he could breathe just a bit more easily when Harvey told him he didn't want to stop either - Mike wasn't sure he'd have been able to stand it if he had. But Harvey didn't want to stop, he wanted to start, and that made something inside of Mike twist eagerly - even if tonight wasn't the right night for it.
"You want to stay the night?" He asked slowly, pausing over the very idea. "You want to stay the night here?" Because it was strange enough having Harvey in his home, but Harvey staying too - it was threatening to break some part of his brain as he tried to wrap his mind around it.
Harvey laughed, looking into Mike's eyes either a lingering smile. "I want to stay the night, is that so hard to believe? It's late and I don't want to bundle you off to my place and bother Ray again. Plus this is your comfort zone and if we're going to start anything tomorrow, it should be here," Harvey explained, rubbing his thumb over a tense muscle in Mike's shoulder. "Would you rather I didn't?"
Okay, so Harvey had a point and the idea was less completely baffling than it had been a moment before. The idea of it was still a little strange but he could see the reasoning behind it, rather than just some random thought with no explanation behind it. "No, I want you to stay, I just-" He exhaled, and shrugged curling his fingers against the back of his own neck rubbing slowly. "It's not something I'd ever considered before, is all." It made all of this much more real than it had been before too, it wasn't just a conversation to be continued at a later date - or a lingering glance at the office, this was Harvey in his personal and private space and Mike definitely wanted that.
"Nothing is going to happen tonight," Harvey assured him, sliding his fingers under Mike's chin to angle his head up. "Just sleep, together hopefully, although I'm not totally opposed to the couch," he said gently. Even when he was upset, Mike was still alluring and Harvey wanted a way to make him feel better and a way to show him how much he cared and it was really long overdue.
Leaning in Harvey kissed him gently, lips seeming to slot together perfectly as Harvey pulled Mike to him.
Mike went easily when Harvey pulled him closer. He hadn't expected the kiss, not when Harvey had told him nothing was going to happen, having Harvey there made him want something to happen, he was more than content simply having Harvey there - touching him.
It was a simple thing to be kissed by Harvey and let him be the one to control it, so many times in his life Mike had been overeager, and pressed for more too quickly, but here - this was so new that Mike could only let himself be kissed. And it helped; it made him relax, like he was melting into Harvey and forgetting about everything else that had happened during the day and evening before this moment.
Breathing just a little faster when Harvey did pull away, Mike licked his lips, still leaning into Harvey. "I don't want you to sleep on the couch." He told him quietly as he had to almost physically stop himself from initiating another kiss, dropping his forehead to Harvey's shoulder, hiding his face against the side of his neck and breathing in that scent that was purely Harvey.
It felt amazing to kiss Mike, even just for a few moments, having his lap full of the boy he wanted and feeling that delicious tension between them slowly start to magnify and get more and more intense. Harvey knew by the time he gave Mike exactly what he wanted the boy would be half crazy with want and that was just how he wanted it.
"Then let's go to bed, have you got something I can wear that is going to fit someone who's got a larger build than a fourteen year old?" Harvey asked, chuckling softly and burying his fingers in Mike's hair.
"You're so hilarious." Mike said, despite his words his tone was affectionate, torn between pressing into the fingers in his hair and the warmth of Harvey's neck. "Seriously, you should consider a career change, the best comedian in the city."
He felt better, just having Harvey there, and though things had spiraled out of control with Jenny after Harvey arrived Mike couldn't help but be glad that Harvey had come all the same.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Master Post