Tonight I triggered someone I was chatting with online. She has DID and some RA background like my kiddo. I don't know anything about the kiddo's RA group though so I have no idea how much is similar between their experiences. I guess I know some things are similar, but other things are different. Anyway, I guess I thought it would be OK that the ( Read more... )

Like every spring that she has been here with me the kiddo is very dissociative. I have to have her repeat everything, give many reminders, understand that she might not know how to do something that she generally knows well. It's not easy to do this without getting worn out. She is doing better so far this year though. The holidays in general seem ( Read more... )

Well I know now which of the kiddo's parts is especially concerned about Christmas. Hopefully this will lead to more communication. I'm able to work with this part to a certain extent. This is the one that spins and I can generally convince her not to by promising to watch out for the kiddo. It's generally good if I get more information about the ( Read more... )

I took the kiddo on a trip back to the state where she had been abused. This was very scarey for her and I wasn't sure that we would go in the end. But she has good memories from down there at her grandmother's house where we stayed. (she was abused by her father and his friends- this was her maternal grandmother's house and there are no abuse ( Read more... )

The kiddo has me worried. For the past few years we've been going to a water park because the kiddo told me about some bad traumas with her birth father on that day. Smelling food and preparing for the dinner seem to be big triggers. Going to a waterpark and eating pizza worked. This was a plan that over all she was happy with ( Read more... )

Yeah, she's skipping non- halloween things too. Like there was a very mellow party in someone's garage for squeezing apple cider. No one said anything about Halloween. Couldn't convince her to come which was sad because she would have liked it. We could have left if it was bad. She did make it to the SOund of Music sing along and that went pretty ( Read more... )

The kiddo is really shutting down on what she is willing to do. Yesterday she went to the Sound of Music sing along with us and that went mostly OK. Today there was a cider pressing party that I know she would have liked but she got freaked and wouldn't go. Maybe the use of the word 'party' is what was worrying her. I'm certain she was tricked many ( Read more... )

The kiddo- in some parts- is sometimes missing being back with the bad guys cause of the 'fun' she is too*** scared to remember. She did finally draw a movie projector and said she was scared of 'movie theater' but no more info. Hopefully she will let out a little more but even this helps me soothe her.

To help the kiddo deal with Halloween issues I had her pick out some extra pretty lollipops on the internet. It seems to be helping to have some control over something that she is anticipating.

This year has been such a wild ride. On the one hand I've been kind of a sad sack. Many stressful- super stressful issues this year including my Dad's death this summer. OTOH I went and studied with Marge Piercy (poet) this summer and will be studying with Billy Collins (former poet laureate) this coming January. I will also be giving a ( Read more... )