I'm going to make a new lj, because this one i've had since 2005. 2005! I feel depressed writing here, & I don't tend to feel that way in my daily life anymore.

Is anyone good with making layouts & such? & maybe would make one for me?
If not, that's cool. I just don't remember how to do anything.

Yeahhh. So new journal. If anyone wants to know where ( Read more... )

we have a lot of problems. a lot of them we won't, & can't resolve. but yesterday made me realize that those problems don't even matter, because i can't be without you. not now. maybe some day when it's the right thing for both of us, because i know it's not right to assume this is going to be forever. but not now, & not soon. i felt so sad ( Read more... )

maybe i'm just not the type of person who deserves happiness.

please don't leave me.

I feel really upset that I can't play WoW right now.

I'm such a loser.

( Read more... )

It's a hard thing for me just say, "hey yeah, this is who I am," because I honestly don't know. There's so many different personalities that I carry around, & to be honest I don't know which one I actually am.

I've had a hard time with my relationship with Rocky lately. For-a-long-time-lately. I think we're just very different people, & I hate to ( Read more... )

How do you feel about me? No, really, how do you feel? I don't want you to say "I don't know" or "I love you", because that has lost so much meaning since you first said it. In fact, it means alomst nothing, because I almost never fully believe you. I know you want to stay with me, yeah I know. But don't just be with me to be with me. Make me feel ( Read more... )

I'm going to try & just relax. I'm such an emotionally-driven person all the time, & it's bringing me down in so many parts of my life. Not that it's always bad to be this way, just lately, I really think, with my family, work & relationship, it's seriously making it all so much harder than it has to be. & i have to trust him on this one ( Read more... )

So I've been thinknig about University.

A lot.

& I feel very torn asunder about all of it.

If I go learn Japanese further, learn some mad teaching skills and teach in Japan, then that would be perfect & I'd love it.

But then I think... "Hey, what if you're still with Rocky?"

& as if we haven't talked about it.

We've talked about it. & he used to say he ( Read more... )

Does anyone else get afraid when their boyfriend gos out, and actually has fun? Like as if, he's out there with all his friends, and you're at work, or home, or whatever... and you're alone. & he knows that you're alone. & soon he's just going to realize how boring it is with you, and he's not even going to want to be with you.
Or what if he cheats ( Read more... )