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Good morning
Sex is a great way to start the morning. It's even better with two people. -
Why now?
I don't see why my kids are complaining if I wander around the house naked. I didn't hear them complaining about me being naked when they were conceived. -
Yech!
My deodorant tastes awful! Let's not ask how I know this, just take my word for it.
Posted via m.livejournal.com.
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Found her!
That last entry? About finding my first crush? Well, it's been a month and I couldn't wait any longer, so I sent her a message. Even ponied up $1 to Facebook to have it go to her inbox instead her "other" folder. She replied, and it is indeed her ( Read more... ) -
Lost (puppy) love found?
Back in elementary school, my first crush disappeared between school years. She didn't live near me, so I had no idea what happened to her. There in one grade, gone the next. This has always bothered me and I occasionally try to find her ( Read more... ) -
Out of Context Theater
Me: Where do you want it?
My Wife: I don't care! Just find a hole and put it in!
( Explanation behind the cut. ) -
Attempted hack
My e-mail provider warned me of an attempt to access my account from Russia. Since a) LJ is the only thing this account is used for and b) it came from Russia, I figure someone's trolling LJ account e-mail addresses. I thought all my friends (Dave) should be aware.
Posted via m.livejournal.com.
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She'll be popular
I was speaking with a friend who's "not from around here", thus English is not his first language, but he speaks it far better than any second language I've supposedly studied. We both have young teens and somehow the conversation took an odd turn and he stated, "I don't believe in abstinence."
The first thing that came to mind, which I did not ( Read more... ) -
Misread subject line
Today's misread spam subject line: Hot llamas banged by Germans. It actually said, "Hot latinas banged by Germans." Not sure what lead me to read it the way I did at first glance.