そう連絡が取れなったのはもう５週間目になりました。さすがにウェブ上にも「自然消滅の兆候があります」って書かれます。昨日も友達に相談してやはり自分周りの男たちがみんなやばすぎて、なんたか僕はそういう相手が引き連れる素質ありそうｗ

悲しすぎるだ

もし本当の気持ちを相手にぶつかったら、紛れもなく縁を切る終盤になります。それは怖い。まだ心の準備出来てないから、ちょっと間をとって待ってます。でも最初の絶望感や苦しい気持ちも日に日にさめていって今はもうそんなに強く思ってません。やはり時間は心の病に一番の癒す薬だ。

でもそういう形で縁を切るなんて本当に悲しかった。

did my first STD checkup yesterday and shall be getting the results tomorrow afternoon. i know something is wrong since i returned, and it has not been improving. i know something is lurking within. and i do not feel right about it. something, somewhere has gone wrong. i am scared of finding out. but i have convinced myself it is better to know ( Read more... )

not having people to talk to about my anxieties brings me to this page.

people around me are getting worried. yup, the virus is spreading, i have just received the first (definitely not the last) rejection of my grant applications, my correspondence with a potential research host partner has mysteriously come to an end, my lack of confidence in my ( Read more... )

 やっと試験が終わりました。

relieved but then uneasy
its the most crucial semester in my university life but yet i know deep in my heart i did not put in my best...haha...its all over, wad's the point to fret about anyway...

just wait...

いま不安でも、待つしかできないでしょう？