So I'm back in California. I missssssssss Steeeeeeeeeeeve!!! It's even harder than I thought it would be. I'm not dealing well with being away from him. It just doesn't feel right, it feels so fundamentally wrong to not be able to be with him. It's like part of me is missing. On the plus side, he's even more wonderful than I expected him to be and ( Read more... )

All right, here are "Steve and I" and "a castle." This should suit anyone's photo-viewing needs for my stay in Scotland, but just in case it doesn't I'm posting 59 more photos under the cut. They're all this size and I really think they're worth seeing, but that's still a buttload of photos so I am warning you.
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I feel like my heart is being pulled in several different directions right now, and none of them coincide. I'm also pretty fucking depressed, for a number of very legitimate reasons. I do not feel like discussing any of these reasons here. This doesn't feel like a safe community for me anymore. I'm sure I will always keep this journal and will post ( Read more... )

Does anyone have any general relationship advice? It may or may not help, but I could really use some right now.

I saw Derrick on Wednesday and Sarah on Thursday. The combination of the two of them really kicked me into shape, and I genuinely feel like myself again (for the first time in literally years!). I may elaborate more on this later, but I ( Read more... )

I hate America. I want to get the hell out of here ( Read more... )

I have this personal taboo against talking about my relationship here. I didn't feel this way in the past. I used to talk like mad about my romantic life in this journal. I believed in writing about everything here, in being as honest as possible. I don't know what I believe in now, but this journal has changed. As have I. I no longer talk about ( Read more... )

Does anyone else ever feel like everyone they know is lying to them all the time about everything and that your entire relationship with them is some elaborate hoax, or am I the only one?

It sucks how much I fucking hate men. I've tried not to hate them. I spent years and years making excuses for them and admonishing myself for stereotyping them and basically just refusing to believe that what I had observed was true. And no, I don't think all men are evil bastards. There are exceptions. I just think most are. Maybe deep down they ( Read more... )