It’s *that* time again! Time for Orny’s Hexannual Universal Internal Vernal Underwear Interval!

Umm… what?

If you were with me back in 2013, you’d know that I discovered that I have an internal timer which universally goes off every six years in the springtime. This extremely precise biological clock provides me with absolutely vital information ( Read more... )

People really seem to appreciate my candor and openness. That’s been true for years: I was even given a company-wide Core Value Award for epitomizing Sapient’s value of Openness. And readers of this blog have told me that they admire me for my willingness to publicly share my most intimate thoughts.

So in that spirit, let’s talk about my ( Read more... )

I usually start feeling apprehensive even before I’ve finished the Pan-Mass Challenge ride. I guess most people would wonder why, since I’m on the verge of completing a noteworthy physical achievement that also represents a meaningful contribution to cancer research. I have three reasons.

The first is the easiest: the PMC takes place the first ( Read more... )

Every so often I’ve mentioned my former wife here, mostly in terms of her effect on my life or my current emotional state. She really is one of the best things to ever happen to me. But bless her soul, she had the homemaking skills of Paris Hilton. Here’s one of my all-time favorite stories…

At one point during college we lived in a tiny apartment ( Read more... )

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Do you enjoy the cold weather and snow for the holidays? Well, I’m a high summer sort of person, really. Autumn really depresses me, because it heralds the end of the world and eight months of cold, barren, deadness. On the other hand, winter biking can be a lot of fun; it’s a good challenge, there are fewer people out, it’s more peaceful, and ( Read more... )

Do holidays make any sense to you? They really don’t to me. One day we’re looking for rodents, the next we’re Irish, then we’re looking for egg-laying rabbits. One day we wear disguises and teach our children extortion, the next we celebrate the land’s bounty, then we give it all away to our friends, followed quickly by staying up all night and ( Read more... )