what am i doing? i'm a real freak. i go on. Lord, please help me, please fix me. i'm so tired of being me. i'm so tired of being such a poor representation of You and all You stand for. i am so full of myself and i am such an idiot. man, this is so tough. i can't explain it, but i am sad. God has blessed me with so much, and i screw it all up, and ( Read more... )

well, i just got back from cal state fullerton. my pal marlene goes to school there, so my pal kenny and i went to visit her around 4:30. marlene's friend jenn was there, and later, her room mate rachel joined us. we went to downtown disney and had some fun. i was acting really goofy tonight. i'm kinda ashamed of myself. we all had fun, but i could ( Read more... )

i'm realizing a lot of things. i'm been feeling very lonely, but i realize i just need to get over it. i have the Lord and He is all i need. but the lonely i have been feeling isn't a spiritual loneliness necessarily, but rather an earthbound loneliness. it's a worthless thing to have. i mean, i just am haunted by my past. it reminds me of the mae ( Read more... )

mae - giving it away ( Read more... )

mae - embers and envelopes ( Read more... )